Merry Christmas from the Family

Discussion in 'Entertainment, Culture, and Sports' started by Thomas, Dec 23, 2011.

  1. Thomas

    Thomas Senior member

    Likes Received:
    Jul 25, 2006
    A hearty Texan Merry Christmas to you all

    [color=330099]Mom got drunk and dad got drunk
    At our Christmas party
    We were drinking champagne punch and
    Homemade egg nog

    Little sister brought her new boyfriend
    He was a Mexican
    We didn’t know what to think of him
    Til he sang Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad.

    Brother David brought his kids with him
    The three from his first wife Lynn
    And the two identical twins
    From his second wife Marynell

    Of course he brought his new wife Kay
    Who talks all about A.A.
    Chain-smoking while the stereo plays
    Noel, Noel, the first Noel.

    Carve the turkey, turn the ballgame on
    Make margaritas when the egg nog’s gone
    Send somebody to the quick pack store
    We need some ice and an extension cord
    A can of bean dip and some Diet Rite
    A box of tampons and some Marlboro Lights
    Hallelujiah! everybody say “Cheese”
    Merry Christmas from the Family

    Ken and Rita came from Harlingen
    I can’t remember how I’m kin to them
    But when they tried to plug their motor home in
    They blew our Christmas lights

    Cousin David knew just what went wrong
    So we all waited out on our front lawn
    He threw a breaker and the lights came on
    And we sang Silent Night, O Holy Night.

    Carve the turkey turn the ballgame on,
    Make bloody marys, ‘cause we all want one
    Send somebody to the stop-and-go
    We need some celery and a can of fake snow
    A bag of lemons and some diet sprite
    A box of tampons and some Salem lights
    Hallelujiah! everybody say “Cheese”
    Merry Christmas from the Family[/color]

    (typed from memory, bitches, so I could be wrong in spots)
    Last edited: Dec 23, 2011

  2. geoffbrown

    geoffbrown New Member

    Likes Received:
    Dec 23, 2011
    Manchester, UK
    That was beautiful - merry christmas to you, too!

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