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Mens Fashion and Dating

squiresj0924

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May 16, 2019
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Hey all! New to the forum because I need some fashion advice to update my closet and get ready for the dating scene again. I've seen and read in a couple different places that ladies like solid colors, so I picked up a couple Henleys the last time I went to AE. I've got the grooming thing down pretty good, I'm sure it could improve, but I need some fashion advice. I'm a 31 year old male, was married to my ex wife for 11 years, and not exactly a small guy. I'm 5'-7" and about 260 lbs. I've got a girl I'm talking to and want to impress her. Help a guy out, please!
 

Ebitdaddy

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I don't think you can really say "woman are attracted to solid colors" anymore than you can say men are. I would just focus on getting the basics down and do whatever you want from there? Whatever makes you feel most confident is probably best so maybe focus on nailing fit.
 

johng70

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Fit is the key thing to impressing. I agree with the above poster - I don't think there's any science to that notion that women are attracted to solid colors. It's much more about fit - given your body shape you're going to need things tailored to get a good fit. You can wear jeans or chinos, just expect to get them taken in. Try to avoid getting pants that your legs swim in. So, if you find something that the waist, butt and thighs look good in just get that, buying long if you need to. Getting the length adjusted is the biggest thing.

Similar with shirts - make sure they fit well. Avoid check or anything with horizontal patterns (since that accentuates girth) and instead stick to vertical or solids. No idea where you live so can't comment on climate but with summer coming, make sure you have appropriate clothes (you should really have short sleeve shirts if you're in a warm climate).

So, find some pants, Shorts if appropriate where you live and shirts that fit you - so buy from a place you can try on. You can take to a tailor (many drycleaners have tailoring services if there isn't a stand-alone tailor shop near you) so you can get some adjustments made.

And, if it is warm, you need to have some shorts that fit well too. Outside of a first date, you're going to be in shorts in many warm places.

Shoes: Avoid the mundane brand tennis shoes (i.e. nike, addidas, etc). Get some decent casual shoes - and if warm climate and sandals or flip flops (Olukai makes some very nice leather flip flps that are amazingly comfortable) are common you can get decent quality there too. In other words, dress nicely but don't overdress (outside of that first date when people tend to overdress). I live in the midwest and in the summer people where shorts/t shirts and tennis shoes. I tend to wear nicer shorts (NO CARGO SHORTS), clean tees or short sleeve silk or linen shirts. Just a personal choice because they breath better than a cotton polo. And I'll often wear Olukai leather flip flops. All this unless I'm going to a nice venue that requires me to dress better. But, my point is - don't dress more formally than everyone (chinos, long sleeve button down and dress shoes in 85 degree heat).

So, don't think that STYLE = FORMALITY. It doesn't.
And fit is king, not price.
 

squiresj0924

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All very good points! I live in WV, so right now, the temp fluctuates a lot and it's nothing to see an 80 degree day. Most of the time, I'm in shorts and flip flops for the summer if I'm not at work. However, I would like to find some nice, breathable pants. I've thought seriously about straying away from my normal boot cut style and getting something a little slimmer fitting just for the heck of it. I have a couple shirts I generally wear for work that feel good on me, make me feel skinnier, and breath well, but I would wear them on a date. I watch Alex Costa on YouTube and his latest video on style has me thinking seriously about a pair of Chelsea boots in tan or black. What are some thoughts on black denim and Cuban shirts? I like the button up style of the Cuban as it looks more comfortable than an Oxford dress shirt. I need shorts anyway, so I will try to avoid cargo pockets and definitely look up the flip flops! Thanks for the help so far!

Fit is the key thing to impressing. I agree with the above poster - I don't think there's any science to that notion that women are attracted to solid colors. It's much more about fit - given your body shape you're going to need things tailored to get a good fit. You can wear jeans or chinos, just expect to get them taken in. Try to avoid getting pants that your legs swim in. So, if you find something that the waist, butt and thighs look good in just get that, buying long if you need to. Getting the length adjusted is the biggest thing.

Similar with shirts - make sure they fit well. Avoid check or anything with horizontal patterns (since that accentuates girth) and instead stick to vertical or solids. No idea where you live so can't comment on climate but with summer coming, make sure you have appropriate clothes (you should really have short sleeve shirts if you're in a warm climate).

So, find some pants, Shorts if appropriate where you live and shirts that fit you - so buy from a place you can try on. You can take to a tailor (many drycleaners have tailoring services if there isn't a stand-alone tailor shop near you) so you can get some adjustments made.

And, if it is warm, you need to have some shorts that fit well too. Outside of a first date, you're going to be in shorts in many warm places.

Shoes: Avoid the mundane brand tennis shoes (i.e. nike, addidas, etc). Get some decent casual shoes - and if warm climate and sandals or flip flops (Olukai makes some very nice leather flip flps that are amazingly comfortable) are common you can get decent quality there too. In other words, dress nicely but don't overdress (outside of that first date when people tend to overdress). I live in the midwest and in the summer people where shorts/t shirts and tennis shoes. I tend to wear nicer shorts (NO CARGO SHORTS), clean tees or short sleeve silk or linen shirts. Just a personal choice because they breath better than a cotton polo. And I'll often wear Olukai leather flip flops. All this unless I'm going to a nice venue that requires me to dress better. But, my point is - don't dress more formally than everyone (chinos, long sleeve button down and dress shoes in 85 degree heat).

So, don't think that STYLE = FORMALITY. It doesn't.
And fit is king, not price.
 

mensimageconsultant

Distinguished Member
Joined
Mar 15, 2006
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4,608
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There's nothing wrong with checks on shirts. Cuban shirts won't impress, and dark blue denim is more useful than black denim. Shorts almost always are a negative on dates. On a date, it nearly always is best to wear a shirt that buttons down the front, though probably not in solid white. Linen and linen-cotton pants are relatively breathable (and probably would be overkill worn with linen shirting). Dark boots would be better than tan boots; light-colored footwear looks out of place at night and in some other settings.
 

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