Know any good Sartorial Jokes?

[Despos]

A client ordered bespoke trousers because he could not find any that fit well. I ask, "What is the problem?" He says " Due to a birth defect, I have 5 penises". I thought he was joking. Made the trousers, he returns and tries them on. I ask" How do they fit". He says, "Like a glove!"

 

[BareSolid]

Originally Posted by Despos

A client ordered bespoke trousers because he could not find any that fit well. I ask, "What is the problem?" He says " Due to a birth defect, I have 5 penises". I thought he was joking. Made the trousers, he returns and tries them on. I ask" How do they fit". He says, "Like a glove!"

Ha!

Well done for posting an actual joke, rather than some snooty quip.

 

[Concordia]

And the default classic/clichÃ

:

A guy goes to buy a suit. He tries one on that is obviously a few sizes too big, but the salesman will not be denied and insists that it looks great.

The customer says "but the jacket is too long!" Not a problem, says the salesman-- just hunch up your shoulders a bit. He then complains "the sleeves come down to my knuckles!" Says the salesman, just raise your arms a bit and bend the elbows. The the customer protests "but the pants-- they are too long and even with the belt everything is sagging below the waist!" No sweat says the salesman. Just crouch a little and it will all ride up into place.

Defeated, the customer pays for the suit and lurches out into the street wearing it. An old lady, witnessing the spectacle, says "Oh, that poor man!" At which her friend replies, "Yes-- but such a lovely suit."

 

[Despos]

Tailor cleans his shop every Sunday morning. He is sweeping the side walk in front and two guys approach and say, "We always wanted to order a suit here but can never make it in when you are open." Upon entering the shop, they hit the tailor on the head and rob the store.
Police show up and ask the tailor for a description of the men. " Oh sure, says the tailor,
one was a 44R with a low right shoulder, the other was a 42L.