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If you owned your own Firm, what would the dress code be

Discussion in 'Classic Menswear' started by Quadcammer, Jun 6, 2012.

  1. JPHardy

    JPHardy Senior member

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    Wasn't that the slogan from your 2008 campaign?
     
  2. F. Corbera

    F. Corbera Senior member

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    I thought it was, "They can have my Allen-Edmonds seconds when they pry them from my cold, dead feet!"

    Note exclamation point.
     
  3. Quadcammer

    Quadcammer Senior member

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    Have I been involved in a start up, yes. Worked in technology, no.

    Not all start ups are tech based, for one, and for two, I don't care if this guy is the best coder east of the mississippi. I'm paying him good money to code, so he can put on a pair of khakis and a polo shirt.
     
  4. acridsheep

    acridsheep Senior member

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    It is best not to mess with the nerds. Ply them with mountain dew, shitty pizza and free tickets to dragon/comic/nerd con and forget that you ever gave even half a shit about what they might be wearing. Assuming you want good coders.
     
  5. Hayward

    Hayward Senior member

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    All of my employees are female. When they ask how to dress, I hand them a copy of Popteen.
     
  6. acridsheep

    acridsheep Senior member

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    Ken from Accounting. The gals really fawn over him:

    [​IMG]

    Trevor from Sales. He has an important pitch coming up in Dubuque:

    [​IMG]

    Russ and Jim head to Subway for lunch!

    [​IMG]
     
  7. F. Corbera

    F. Corbera Senior member

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    Why do you have to hand them a copy of a magazine that is at every station in your manicure salon?

    :confused:
     
  8. Hayward

    Hayward Senior member

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    Because that's where I get all my magazines.
     
  9. Layered Player

    Layered Player Senior member

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    I could swear that this was lifted from an old 30's movie like the Thin Man with Ronald Coleman but I can't find a cite.
     
  10. jammyo40

    jammyo40 Well-Known Member

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    ^ These, if you're running a software-based startup. I, for one, cannot think of a single successful startup that enforced any sort of dress code.
     
  11. F. Corbera

    F. Corbera Senior member

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    Just a hint: coders are cheaper in India, and they do not require Mountain Dew.

    Same with lawyers.
     
  12. jammyo40

    jammyo40 Well-Known Member

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    Same with clothing.
     
    1 person likes this.
  13. Jackie Treehorn

    Jackie Treehorn Senior member

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    Is there a reason why the OP insisted on capitalizing the word "Firm" in every usage, by the way? Is this hypothetical firm the sort that would employ, say, Wilford Brimley to chase down and antagonize Tom Cruise?

    If so, I'm on board.
     
  14. MikeDT

    MikeDT Senior member

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    Perhaps it's Firm, as in a gang of criminals or football hooligans? The Kray Twins are often referred to as "The Firm"
     
    Last edited: Jun 6, 2012
  15. MyOtherLife

    MyOtherLife Senior member

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    CIS & TRANS MEN:
    Executives & Managers: Mon-Thu: Suit & Tie. Fri-Sat-Sun: Sport Jackat & Collared Shirt
    The Rest: Mon-Thu: Minimum Sport Jacket & Collared Shirt. Emergency tie to be kept in desk fo use when clients tour the office. Fri-Sat-Sun: Casualwear.
    Denim (without holes or garrish markings) allowed for lower echelon only.

    [COLOR=FF00AA]CIS & TRANS WOMEN: [/COLOR]
    Executives & Managers: Mon-Thu: Suit or Consevative dress. Fri-Sat-Sun: Casual Dresswear
    The Rest: Mon-Sun: Whatever they like. No thongs from Mon-Thu.

    General Rules:
    No Satanic shit, whatsoever it will be permitted. Worship the devil on your own time.
    Turbans can be worn but the concealed ceremonial dagger stays at home or in your cars glove box.
    No Weapons of any kind.
    No invocation of a mating ritual is permitted.
    No Fatwā or other religious judgements are to be passed against any co-worker or their families ever.
    No discussion of Religion or Politics allowed on company ground.
    Metal ear, nose, tongue, clitoral & penile piercings are allowed as long as they don't interfere with the company equipment or internet transmissions.
    No Smoking permitted but Vaping is ok.
    Janitors room not to be used for sexual purposes during business hours.
    If an afternoon meeting is scheduled and business dresswear required, all employees will wear a bib during lunch so as to not soil their clothes.
    Any portable device that vibrates is not allowed to be sat upon or placed between the legs.
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2012
  16. clapeyron

    clapeyron Senior member

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    you Monster!
     
  17. Fraiche

    Fraiche Senior member

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    I would add this to the dress code:

    - No crew neck undershirts if you're wearing a button down with no tie.:bigstar:
     
  18. Keough1206

    Keough1206 Member

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    A volcano in the break room? :nodding:
     
  19. F. Corbera

    F. Corbera Senior member

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    What kind of cleaning policies would you titans institute governing usage of the employee snack and lunch fridges? Would responsibilities rotate among all users, or in cases in which the employee has posted in this thread, would the responsibility be presumptively assigned to him punitively?

    Also, would fish or fragrant ethnic foods be allowed for reheating in the microwaves? Oh, like a fish curry or anything Koreans eat?

    Finally, would you limit lanyard lengths to above crotch level, or is a low, low hang okay?

    I'm asking because we're developing some rules for Styleform that will go into effect next week.

    Thanks.
     
  20. curzon

    curzon Senior member

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    “Curzon understands the cultural nuances of our ti
    
    Easy... if your company monitors Internet usage. Whoever goofed off the most for the week gets to clean the following week.

    Unfair! Korean, Indian, and Thai are 90% of my diet. Forbid those and someone will demand likewise for buttery popcorn and stinky burritos. And have you ever caught a whiff off those Lean Cuisine frozen microwave dinners? Vile.
     
    Last edited: Jun 7, 2012

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