How to decline invitation to a wedding?

[tricota]

I think if it was seone you know well in school, give him a call. Try and figure out if he really wants to see you or if he is just being friendly. It is possible, even after 6 years, that he just want you to be there. In which case you should of couse go. If he is just being friendly, no need to go.

Oh, and I agree with everything else, be polite, send a small gift etc.

 

[dtmt]

Send one of these t-shirts:

 

[johnapril]

I declined an invitation to my sister's wedding (her second) by calling her, offering my congratulations, and my regrets that I couldn't attend due to the travel distance.

 

[NoVaguy]

Originally Posted by johnapril

I declined an invitation to my sister's wedding (her second) by calling her, offering my congratulations, and my regrets that I couldn't attend due to the travel distance.

you skipped your own sister's wedding, even if it's her second?

 

[Musselma]

Second weddings aren't nearly as big of a deal to most people, especially since you've already gotten up peoples expectations that it will end up like your first.

 

[MrDaniels]

Or you can decline an invite to a first wedding by saying what I said to a slutty, whoreish ex-friend of mine "Don't worry...I'll be sure and come to one of your other weddings..."

 

[killerstyle]

if you're truly not close with him anymore, he should understand that you guys went your seperate ways and thats that.

 

[hi-val]

It is a person's right to invite you to a gathering. It is your right to accept or decline the invitation for any reason. It is NOT their right to know why or even worse, to ask why. Send your regrets that you cannot make it and express fond wishes for their happiness. Don't make excuses about travel distances, other engagements, etc. You don't need to, nor should you.

 

[TheFoo]

I don't think declining is an issue, but shouldn't the declining party still send a gift?

 

[tiecollector]

I will probably only invite my closest friends to my wedding, which will be about 5 whole people. If you haven't spoken much and it is inconvenient to go then just be straight up. If you guys haven't been close because life got in the way then I'd probably go for the free food and possibility of meeting hot chicks if nothing else.

 

[MrDaniels]

Originally Posted by mafoofan

I don't think declining is an issue, but shouldn't the declining party still send a gift?


It's a tightrope. the idea is that the gift is in exchange for your meal and drinks! But if one doesn't go, do they have to send the gift? If that was the case, then scam artist couples could invite 350 people that they only barely know to a destination wedding in The Yukon knowing that none of them will show up, yet they get all those presents anyway!

I say, send regrets, and then send a gift only if you truly regret not being able to go.

 

[Matt]

I dont even understand why this is difficult. Check the little box on the invite that says 'I cannot attend' and send it back.

Next time you see him, ask how it went, and say 'ya, sorry I wasnt able to make it, I heard from so-and-so that it was a really great day'

Don't see why that is hard at all.

 

[TheFoo]

Originally Posted by MrDaniels

It's a tightrope. the idea is that the gift is in exchange for your meal and drinks! But if one doesn't go, do they have to send the gift? If that was the case, then scam artist couples could invite 350 people that they only barely know to a destination wedding in The Yukon knowing that none of them will show up, yet they get all those presents anyway!

I say, send regrets, and then send a gift only if you truly regret not being able to go.

I think the gracious thing to do is assume that your presence was genuinely desired. That being the case, I think a gift is called for.

 

[MilanoStyle]

I took care of this. Thanks for all of your replies!

 

[hi-val]

From Miss Manners:

Always plan on sending a gift when you accept a wedding invitation. If you can't make the wedding, it's still nice to send a gift, but you won't be committing a major faux pas if you don't. At the least, send a congratulatory card before the wedding