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How do you know when you've found "The One"?

CBDB

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What ever you do, don't ask Edmorel!
 

IUtoSLU

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I like to think practically. I decided that I wanted to marry my wife when I found that I would much prefer living the rest of my life with her, than without her. I don't believe in any magical "signs". But I do believe in serious self-assessment and looking at the facts. If she wants to be an opera singer in Italy, and you want to live in your small-midwestern home-town, then I would say you should assume no marriage. Etc, etc.
 

TheFoo

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When you find a girl who will watch Transformers: The Movie (the 1986 animated masterpiece, not the 21st century travesty) repeatedly while playing Talisman and take pictures of you at your bespoke fittings.
 

Doc4

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Originally Posted by merkur
How do you know when you've found "The One"
- the girl you want to marry/spend the rest of your life with?


You say those words out loud, about her, and they sound "right".

My rule of sixes: there is a six-month window in which it is appropriate to contemplate marriage and become engaged. It starts once you have been together for six months, and ends at the twelve month point. After that, you are just spinning your wheels: either there's something wrong with her (maybe you can't put your finger on it, but there's something ... ) or there's something wrong with you, committment-wise.

Basically, sometime between 6 and 12 months into the relationship, you need to figure out if she is "the One". I kind of like the flip-a-coin method ... heads you marry, tails you split up. Toss the coin, and then before it lands, you will find yourself hoping for heads or tails ... that's your answer, not what the coin actually lands on.
 

erdawe

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Originally Posted by Doc4
You say those words out loud, about her, and they sound "right".

My rule of sixes: there is a six-month window in which it is appropriate to contemplate marriage and become engaged. It starts once you have been together for six months, and ends at the twelve month point. After that, you are just spinning your wheels: either there's something wrong with her (maybe you can't put your finger on it, but there's something ... ) or there's something wrong with you, committment-wise.

Basically, sometime between 6 and 12 months into the relationship, you need to figure out if she is "the One". I kind of like the flip-a-coin method ... heads you marry, tails you split up. Toss the coin, and then before it lands, you will find yourself hoping for heads or tails ... that's your answer, not what the coin actually lands on.


Interesting thoughts, thanks for sharing!
 

Hard2Fit

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Originally Posted by mafoofan
When you find a girl who will watch Transformers: The Movie (the 1986 animated masterpiece, not the 21st century travesty) repeatedly while playing Talisman and take pictures of you at your bespoke fittings.

Not bad.
That's hard to top.
 

longskate88

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Do you still want to "go out for hamburger even though you've got steak at home?" Do you have steak at home?

With the current girl, I've kind of lost interest in meeting other girls. Does that mean she's the one? Maybe, also I suck at meeting girls. I think the feelings of wanting to meet someone else are slowly coming back.

When we'd been dating for a couple weeks and it was time to decide to be bf/gf, she asked if I wanted to, because I'd been acting non-commital. I said I like two girls right now, one feels like a short-term fling (I like her physically) and the other feels like a long-term thing (We mesh well and I like her personality, respect her, etc.) The current GF is the "long-term" of the two.

I think I'm still looking, because I want it all...the strong physical attraction, and the non-physical attraction and compatibility.
 

Despos

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Originally Posted by longskate88
I think I'm still looking, because I want it all...the strong physical attraction, and the non-physical attraction and compatibility.


Attraction + connection in equal parts, one third mind, one third heart and one third genitals.

If attraction + connection is greater in one area over another it comes back to bite you in the ass.
 

dirk diggler

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Let's explain something. THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS "THE ONE"!!! It is statistically impossible to find one person out of 6 billion in the world. although half of the marriages end in divorce, the other half don't. if those people are so lucky, then the lotto should be out of money!!!

I subscribe to the rule of 100. In your life, you will meet 100 people with whom you are compatible as a mate, although not necessarily in the main "dating" years (16-40). The key is to decide how much compromise you are willing to give/take.

i was married before and I thought she was the one. wrong. I am now remarried, and I am happy with her not because of how she makes me feel, or hot sex, or her education. No, I am married to her because she is my Bonnie and I am her Clyde (think of the Ice Cube/Yo-Yo song). WHen shit is going down at work (like it did this summer before I left my old job), she was my rock of sanity and backed me up, even though that meant leaving her family and moving sight unseen for my new job in a new city. She is a wonderful mother to our kids and I don't worry about them should an untimely death befall me. And yes, she knows how to hook me up in the bedroom. That's how you know.
 

tiecollector

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You know it when you don't wonder who else is out there and if you can do better.
 

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