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How can I pull myself out of this self-induced rut?

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by robbie, Apr 19, 2009.

  1. deacon.516

    deacon.516 Well-Known Member

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    In a few years you obviously qualify to be the president (if you have a birth certificate). Until then get a federal job as a park ranger or lighthouse attendant.
     
  2. username79

    username79 Senior member

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    Jesus Christ.

    You are 23 and working at Target because you're too much of a loser to take genuine action in your life. Your post is full of self-justifications and boils down to a list of things you don't want to do because they are "not for you." Wow. Ever think of doing something that you did not enjoy 100% in order to make some money and begin some sort of career? Stop being a lazy sack of shit working a mindless job and get up and do something with your life. You must be incredibly immature to say "I am just not there" at age twenty three. Grow the fuck up and decide what you want to do with yourself and do it. Otherwise you will wake up at 45 wondering where your life went. I can't believe you are getting married as directionless as you are.

    I apologize for the tone of this post but I feel it is well deserved.
     
  3. username79

    username79 Senior member

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    Whatever you do, don't force anything upon yourself. I'm 23 years old as well, and while I do have a degree, I don't have the slightest clue about what I want from life. I know very well what I don't want, and that's a start, but without knowing what you want and more importantly what you want to do, it makes things difficult and rather painful.
    What is up with this generation of twenty-something year old whiners that have no idea what to do with themselves? Everyone still living at home with their parents post college? Still breast feeding? Don't force anything upon yourself? Whatever happened to hard work, discipline, and some understanding of delayed gratification in order to get somewhere?
     
  4. Aaron

    Aaron Senior member

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    Vancouver and ?
    Jesus Christ. You are 23 and working at Target because you're too much of a loser to take genuine action in your life. Your post is full of self-justifications. Stop being a lazy sack of shit working a mindless job and get up and do something with your life. You must be incredibly immature to say "I am just not there" at age twenty-three. Grow the fuck up and decide what you want to do with yourself and do it. I apologize for the tone of this post but I feel it is well deserved.
    Yes, you need to get some more direction but don't worry if you don't have it all "figured out." I'm 24 and just quitting my job of two years and going traveling in Asia for the summer. I've been accepted into a Mandarin language program in Taiwan that starts in September. If I like it there I will stay and learn the language and explore industries to get into while I'm there. I don't like it I'm coming back my hometown to pursue a Chartered Accountancy. Do I know where either of these paths will ultimately take me? Nope. Am I worried? Not really. I'm just going to try and see what comes up. Don't feel you need to have an exact plan of what you're going to do in a month. I know it's hackneyed and cliched but try a lot of stuff out and follow what interests and excites you. Interested in cars? Try an auto mechanic class through a continuing education program at your local high school. Shit, if you've always wanted to spin a pot (a la Patrick Swayze in Ghost) take a pottery class. It doesn't matter, the whole fact that you tried something new will change your perspective. You've mentioned that you're a practicing Christian. Have you given any thought to missionary work? Travel and seeing how others live, especially non-Westerners, has always opened my eyes. I can't believe I just referenced Swayze semi-seriously... Good luck! PS> If you decide to go to school - It's a pretty bad excuse to say "I can't afford college" when over half of scholarships for education issued every year in the US go unredeemed.
     
  5. username79

    username79 Senior member

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    Yes, you need to get some more direction but don't worry if you don't have it all "figured out." I'm 24 and just quitting my job of two years and going traveling in Asia for the summer. I've been accepted into a Mandarin language program in Taiwan that starts in September. If I like it there I will stay and learn the language and explore industries to get into while I'm there. I don't like it I'm coming back my hometown to pursue a Chartered Accountancy. Do I know where either of these paths will ultimately take me? Nope. Am I worried? Not really. I'm just going to try and see what comes up.

    I just don't understand this stuff. Don't people want to be wealthy? How are you not worried about your future? At least you have a plan unlike the OP.
     
  6. kwilkinson

    kwilkinson Senior member

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    I just don't understand this stuff. Don't people want to be wealthy? How are you not worried about your future? At least you have a plan unlike the OP.

    Not everybody has $$$$ on the mind.
     
  7. Aaron

    Aaron Senior member

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    Vancouver and ?
    I just don't understand this stuff. Don't people want to be wealthy? How are you not worried about your future? At least you have a plan unlike the OP.
    Oh, I want to be wealthy. I am often more money driven than I care to admit. However, do I have a goal of being a millionaire by 35? Nope. I've met too many people that are in high paying jobs because they believe it's where they were supposed to go. They are successful in the sense of having good monetary compensation. However, I don't think they're happy. They're tied down by a lifestyle they have grown accustom to. That being said I've met some hyperkinetic bond traders that are stressed out as hell, make a ton of money but love what they do. Good on them, I just know it's not for me.

    At my age, experience and situation I am able to take some time and really dig and see what I want to devote most of my waking hours to for the next 40-50 years. And in an area of the world I believe will be an incredibly important in the next 100 years. For now I know I have the luxury of time. This wil close sooner rather than later but why would you not take advantage of the opportunity?

    Moreover, I've had the privledge of meeting some very successful people (financially and otherwise). In all of the successful (and happy) people I've gotten to know and admire they've followed what interested them, became passionate about it and worked extremely hard to become really good at what they do. The money usually followed. They never set out knowing what they would accomplish they just kept going.

    Alright, enough rambling...
     
  8. Jekyll

    Jekyll Senior member

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    6,274
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    Jul 1, 2008
    Lot of good advice in this thread. I strongly recommend taking at least a few classes at a community college. It's a good way to get some gen eds taken care of, but beyond that it's a really good way to experiment with different fields without a lot of risk. I've always had an interest in film, but if it wasn't for the fact that my local community college has a video production program, I never would have gone in that direction simply because film school is such a huge investment. Since you're interested in photography, I would think photography classes would be beneficial, not just for the learning, but also for the opportunities to network and to share your work with others.

    Now is the time for you to experiment and try new things. Do it.


    I apologize for the tone of this post but I feel it is well deserved.


    No it is not. You are a dick.
     
  9. clee1982

    clee1982 Senior member

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    New York City, NY, USA
    Have fun in Taiwan, which program at which school, I lived in Taiwan until 15 years old.

    Sorry for hijacking.

    As to the OP, the only thing I can tell you is "try" something. You will never figure out anything if you don't try.

    Yes, you need to get some more direction but don't worry if you don't have it all "figured out." I'm 24 and just quitting my job of two years and going traveling in Asia for the summer. I've been accepted into a Mandarin language program in Taiwan that starts in September. If I like it there I will stay and learn the language and explore industries to get into while I'm there. I don't like it I'm coming back my hometown to pursue a Chartered Accountancy. Do I know where either of these paths will ultimately take me? Nope. Am I worried? Not really. I'm just going to try and see what comes up.

    Don't feel you need to have an exact plan of what you're going to do in a month. I know it's hackneyed and cliched but try a lot of stuff out and follow what interests and excites you. Interested in cars? Try an auto mechanic class through a continuing education program at your local high school. Shit, if you've always wanted to spin a pot (a la Patrick Swayze in Ghost) take a pottery class. It doesn't matter, the whole fact that you tried something new will change your perspective.

    You've mentioned that you're a practicing Christian. Have you given any thought to missionary work? Travel and seeing how others live, especially non-Westerners, has always opened my eyes.

    I can't believe I just referenced Swayze semi-seriously...

    Good luck!

    PS> If you decide to go to school - It's a pretty bad excuse to say "I can't afford college" when over half of scholarships for education issued every year in the US go unredeemed.
     
  10. username79

    username79 Senior member

    Messages:
    2,144
    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2007
    Lot of good advice in this thread. I strongly recommend taking at least a few classes at a community college. It's a good way to get some gen eds taken care of, but beyond that it's a really good way to experiment with different fields without a lot of risk. I've always had an interest in film, but if it wasn't for the fact that my local community college has a video production program, I never would have gone in that direction simply because film school is such a huge investment. Since you're interested in photography, I would think photography classes would be beneficial, not just for the learning, but also for the opportunities to network and to share your work with others.

    No it is not. You are a dick.


    If the OP follows on the path of his first post, he will try your suggestions and then decide that they "are not for him" because they might involve commitment, work, and perhaps a little discomfort. "Man, I went to a photography class but I didn't really like the chairs they made me sit on, so I went home."

    Glad you think I'm a dick.
     
  11. Tck13

    Tck13 Senior member

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    5,750
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    Location:
    Philly
    Would working in a medical field be appealing? Look at certification as an x-ray technician, radiation therapist, nuclear medicine tech, etc. Two year technical degree, no college required; decent pay and hours; possibly personally rewarding? Otherwise, +1 to the trades.
    +1 Someone I dated did this and is now a Resp. Therapist. Makes good money and loves her job. Minimal education.
    Electricians and welders can get paid more than many 'professional' jobs, but you need at least levels of certification to get into them, and/or apprenticeships.
    I haven't read all of the pages in this thread but the whole country is in desperate need of Lineman. It's outdoor, Union work and pays into the high $20's per hour. One just needs to take a math test to get into a union (check out IBEW). It can be physical work but it's really not that bad and it'll keep you in shape. Also, some companies will pay for you to go to school and in 2 years of school / work you'll be making great $ with a good job. ($40 / hr for overtime in storms and other bad weather) Target might have tuition reimbursement? I'd also just go to a community college to get the regular courses out of the road. I graduated from a private college and it was really a waste of money. If I had it to do over again, I'd go to a community college and then transfer to a regular college and get a degree at night in 2 years. Many schools now have this program if you have about 60 credits (or something like that). Trades are good $ at times but can be boring / slightly dangerous at times (if you aren't careful) but can be a short term plan while you take some classes and enjoy time with the wife...
     
  12. username79

    username79 Senior member

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    Not everybody has $$$$ on the mind.
    This forum is generally about expensive (nice) things: expensive clothes, expensive furniture, expensive art, expensive food, expensive homes/apartments, expensive cities, expensive travel. Since lots of money is required to obtain expensive things, one would suggest that most involved would be very money-driven. I think money is one of the most important things in the world if not the most important. Money allows you to do what you want. Money allows freedom of choice. Money enables happiness and satisfaction.
     
  13. Jekyll

    Jekyll Senior member

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    If the OP follows on the path of his first post, he will try your suggestions and then decide that they "are not for him" because they might involve commitment, work, and perhaps a little discomfort. "Man, I went to a photography class but I didn't really like the chairs they made me sit on, so I went home."

    Glad you think I'm a dick.


    Bitter much?



    Also, it's none of my business (but what the hell, this is the internet)...I agree with the people cautioning you against marriage. Early marriage can work, but it requires someone much more stable than you seem to be. You don't want to lock yourself down at this point in your life.
     
  14. username79

    username79 Senior member

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    Bitter much?
    No, just think the OP is someone who can't stand up and make a decision. Is that wrong?
     
  15. Jekyll

    Jekyll Senior member

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    No, just think the OP is a pussy who can't stand up and make a decision. Is that wrong?
    It's wrong to make a decision if you aren't reasonably certain that it is the right decision. You remind me of the Lee J Cobb character in 12 Angry Men.
     
  16. username79

    username79 Senior member

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    It's wrong to make a decision if you aren't reasonably certain that is the right decision.

    Ah, so you advocate "experimenting" with your life making minimum wage until you find something you like (welfare?), at say, age 45?
     
  17. tagutcow

    tagutcow Senior member

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    Greensboro NC
    This forum is generally about expensive (nice) things: expensive clothes, expensive furniture, expensive art, expensive food, expensive homes/apartments, expensive cities, expensive travel. Since lots of money is required to obtain expensive things, one would suggest that most involved would be very money-driven.

    I think money is one of the most important things in the world if not the most important. Money allows you to do what you want. Money allows freedom of choice. Money enables happiness and satisfaction.


    Can you do the Gordon Gekko speech?
     
  18. Jekyll

    Jekyll Senior member

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    Ah, so you advocate "experimenting" with your life making minimum wage until you find something you like (welfare?), at say, age 45?

    Well...if you say that is what I said, than that must be what I said.
     
  19. JustinW

    JustinW Senior member

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    Lot of good advice in this thread. I strongly recommend taking at least a few classes at a community college. It's a good way to get some gen eds taken care of, but beyond that it's a really good way to experiment with different fields without a lot of risk. I've always had an interest in film, but if it wasn't for the fact that my local community college has a video production program, I never would have gone in that direction simply because film school is such a huge investment. Since you're interested in photography, I would think photography classes would be beneficial, not just for the learning, but also for the opportunities to network and to share your work with others.

    Now is the time for you to experiment and try new things. Do it.

    No it is not. You are a dick.


    Multiple +1's, for various points.
     
  20. username79

    username79 Senior member

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    Well...if you say that is what I said, than that must be what I said.
    To summarize the OP: - Don't want to get a degree (work) because taking classes is too hard (work is too hard). Especially, taking classes I am not interested in is too hard for me! - Looking for a job that doesn't require education (work) and provides money to allow someone to pursue interests/leisure activities (not work). - Don't see myself going to trade school because I wouldn't find myself "enjoying" it (work) - Don't see myself being a welder (work), electrician (work), apprentice (work) - Don't see myself figuring out what I want to do because personality tests don't show me careers that will bring me fulfillment (See above, I want to do no work to be able to not work) - If I have to "tolerate a job/career" (direct quote) I at least want to make money. - My gf will marry me even if I am flat broke. I guess she will take care of herself and our kids while I work at Target. . . . Are you fucking serious? This is a prime welfare candidate. Don't want to do anything (especially if it is not completely enjoyable) but want to make money. The lack of self-responsibility is astounding, and people here encourage it!
     

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