Homeless guy in my carport - a question of etiquette

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by mbc, Oct 5, 2008.

  1. andrewwang

    andrewwang Well-Known Member

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    have your dog set up camp in his shopping cart
     


  2. Piobaire

    Piobaire Not left of center?

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    Wait until he claims you caused him to injure himself, due to unsafe circumstances in your carport, and sues you.
     


  3. mbc

    mbc Senior member

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    Thanks for all the feedback, everyone.

    Wait until he claims you caused him to injure himself, due to unsafe circumstances in your carport, and sues you.

    That is actually a pretty sweet idea; I may try that if I ever lose my job.
     


  4. Orsini

    Orsini Senior member

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    So there's this homeless guy in our neighborhood who regularly sets up camp in our carport….
    One thing is clear: most of the respondents to this thread will not be in competition for any Mother Theresa awards…
    You did not mention if you rent or own. If you are a renter or there is a homeowners association, you could report it to them and possibly, they will handle it. This gives you a little emotional distance and hopefully avoids having this person decide you are the cause of his problem. You might try your church, if you have one (or even if you do not), you could discuss the situation with "Chaplin Charlie" after the weekly "magic show". Maybe his eminence will put his money where his mouth is and reach out to this person -- after all, it is his job to do that sort of thing. At least you will get some free "professional advice". One thing is clear; having this fellow take up semi-permanent residence in your TAOR is a problem. It could lead to liability issues or even to your becoming a victim of a crime. However, if would be nice if you did not have to become Gordon Gekko, throw away your humanity, and screw up your karma more than it already is while you are doing it…
     


  5. Orsini

    Orsini Senior member

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    Also, bindlestiffs used to have a code they would draw or write on poles near the train tracks to indicate whether or not a house was a good place, e.g. does the house offer work, food, shotgun + dog, etc. Maybe modern hobos have a similar system...
    This is still in use today. If you are going to purchase a bar, this is one of the things you want to check and make allowance for...
     


  6. Ataturk

    Ataturk Senior member

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    Sounds like you just have to wait. He'll eventually need a fix bad enough to break into your house (he knows your schedule, after all) and rob you. Then he'll probably move on.
     


  7. Rye GB

    Rye GB Angry Englishman

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    If the LAPD has the time to hide behind hedgerows in my neighborhood during every morning commute to hand out citations at Stop signs I believe they may have the time to fix this problem for you, God forbid we interrupt them from handing out frivolous tickets on behalf of local government quotas and make them conduct some real Police work.

    Sounds like something that would happen in my neighborhood: Silverlake, Echo Park, and Los Feliz vicinity. The longer you let this guy hang around your home the more you'll be exposing your daily schedule to him allowing an opportunist and his cohorts the knowledge of knowing when would be a good time to check out the inside of your house.
     


  8. j

    j (stands for Jerk) Admin

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    Sorry about that, dude... the girl kicked me out and I've been sleeping off a serious bender. I'll move out immediately.

    P.s. thanx for the wi-fi.
     




  9. Orsini

    Orsini Senior member

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    Also, bindlestiffs used to have a code they would draw or write on poles near the train tracks to indicate whether or not a house was a good place, e.g. does the house offer work, food, shotgun + dog, etc...
    Here it is: http://www.hobo.com/hobo_signs.htm Some of you might want to take a look at this, too: http://www.hobo.com/hobo_code.htm
     


  10. Dewey

    Dewey Senior member

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    Mother Theresa award
    [​IMG] That would be me, for my old coffee can suggestion. Seriously, I once rented a place in a large house that had been converted to four or five apartments. The basement was a shared laundry room with two or three washers and two or three dryers. It was never locked, and the entry was from the outside. A homeless guy found his way in. Behind the laundry room, there was easy access to the unfinished area around the furnace. With some scraps of carpet, he fixed himself up a bed by the furnace and slept there for a while. I never reported him because I thought he was harmless. But then he started shitting in the corner and leaving coffee cans full of shit and piss back there. Looking back on the situation now, I don't think I was being kind and laid-back so much as I was being lazy. That's no way to live. Even if the guy chooses that life, the fact that he's sunk to such a standard suggests he's sick and needs help. Call the cops or whatever and get him out of your carport. That's all you can do.
     


  11. Milhouse

    Milhouse Senior member

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    One thing is clear: most of the respondents to this thread will not be in competition for any Mother Theresa awards...


    Hmm, I guess it is all about the metric with which we use to judge our actions. I'm a practical kind of guy, so I think the real competition is who can eliminate the freeloader with the least amount of effort and cost. In a northern climate, I say ice water would probably win. Pepper spray is a good alternative for a generalized solution applicable to a variety of climates.

    Whatever you do, don't cut out his vocal chords as you want him to be able to tell other bindlestiffs to stay away.
     


  12. philosophe

    philosophe Senior member

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    Get rid of this guy asap. Perhaps the local service agency for the homeless can help, but your best bet is the cops.
     


  13. Orsini

    Orsini Senior member

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    [​IMG] That would be me, for my old coffee can suggestion.
    As usual, there is plenty of bad karma to go around.
    Seriously, I once rented a place in a large house that had been converted to four or five apartments...It was never locked
    You need to secure this stuff. That is one of the ways there kind of problems will get started for you
    ...and the entry was from the outside. A homeless guy found his way in....
    Yes, I know the rest. I have lived it. I was a musician in the 60's so I know that life is not a Bambi movie. I already made a couple of suggestions that could possibly have a positive effect or at least get it off the OP's plate without turning him into a scumbag.
     


  14. Orsini

    Orsini Senior member

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    Hmm, I guess it is all about the metric with which we use to judge our actions. I'm a practical kind of guy, so I think the real competition is who can eliminate the freeloader with the least amount of effort and cost. In a northern climate, I say ice water would probably win. Pepper spray is a good alternative for a generalized solution applicable to a variety of climates.
    In California I expect that would be assault. The police might not be amused. And then the problem would be motivated to come back...
    Whatever you do, don't cut out his vocal chords as you want him to be able to tell other bindlestiffs to stay away.
    Just use one of those Hobo signs I showed you...
     


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