Groom's attire - Tux or Suit?

[jinx05]

Greetings forum!

I would appreciate any feedback I can get...

I just ordered a custom suit from Burberry for my wedding. I am the groom. It's a black worsted wool - two button suit. Under the suit I am wearing a classic white french cuffed shirt. I have picked a plain Robert Talbot black long tie. I felt very confident when meeting with the tailor.

My issue is that I am wondering if I should be wearing a Tux, or at least have the Tux lapels. Is a black suit appropriate for a groom? My wedding theme is traditional and formal. I see a lot of grooms wearing suits in magazines, but just want to get some feedback.

Thanks for your time!

Rhys

 

[acidboy]

Congratulations on your wedding! You will find out in a few more posts down that members here are not inclined on the BLACK SUIT. A Tuxedo would be more appropriate of course, unless it is a daytime affair.

In any case, whatever you decide on wearing, have a grand time at your wedding, and have a very fruitful and wonderful marriage.

 

[Sator]

Originally Posted by jinx05

Greetings forum! I would appreciate any feedback I can get... I just ordered a custom suit from Burberry for my wedding. I am the groom. It's a black worsted wool - two button suit. Under the suit I am wearing a classic white french cuffed shirt. I have picked a plain Robert Talbot black long tie. I felt very confident when meeting with the tailor. My issue is that I am wondering if I should be wearing a Tux, or at least have the Tux lapels. Is a black suit appropriate for a groom? My wedding theme is traditional and formal. I see a lot of grooms wearing suits in magazines, but just want to get some feedback. Thanks for your time! Rhys
First thing: is this a day time or an evening wedding? Because if it is a day time wedding here is what Carson Kressley says in his book "Off the Cuff": Tuxedos are worn to FORMAL events held after six o'clock in the evening. If you get an invitation to a black tie event before six, send me the names of the hosts. I'll 'shoot 'em an e-mail.' Or I'll just shoot 'em. For most things Kressley is way too foppish and fashion forward for most forum members but here he is spot on. Well almost spot on - because dinner jackets ('tuxedos') are semi-formal dress and NOT formal dress. White tie (with tail coats) is formal dress. The equivalent daytime form of semi-formal dress is the stroller. The daytime formal dress equivalent of white tie is morning dress but this has become rare in the United States, though it is still common at weddings in the UK, Europe, Japan and the Commonwealth. Lounge suits are informal dress and they are fine only if your bride is equally informally dressed. They should not be worn if the bride is in a formal wedding dress, as this would be like wearing a t-shirt and flip flops. However, those insistent on breaking with tradition and commiting this faux pas should do everything to make the lounge suit look more like ersatz formal dress as possible eg dove grey waistcoat, peaked lapels, bow tie, boutonnierre. Lastly, black lounge suits are worn only by those who regard their wedding day to be their funeral. However, black morning coats (cutaways), and strollers are acceptable although even then grey is the more traditional colour for a groom.

 

[jinx05]

Thank you for the kind words.

I think Gore sums it up well...

But let me ask you this, is it a matter of taste or etiquette that you all don't prefer a black suit for a groom?

Thanks!

 

[Concordia]

I suppose in a pinch one could use the top of a black lounge suit as a stroller jacket. All that is now required is the acquisition of a proper waistcoat and pair of striped trousers to go with the contrast-collared shirt.

Don't forget to put the pocket flaps inside the pockets.

 

[jinx05]

Sator -

Thank you for the insight.

The ceremony is at 4:30pm. If I understand you correctly, a suit and black tie would be approproate since it is before 6pm...no?

Thanks!

 

[Sator]

Oh yes - I should have said congratulations. Pardon my manners. As for the black lounge suit war - please read this thread (all 40 pages!) before you start WWIII again: http://www.styleforum.net/showthread.php?t=8221 It is a question of all three things you mention: taste, etiquette and the traditional preferred colours for a groom.

 

[MrDaniels]

Two big questions:

1) What is the bride wearing?

2) What is the setting for the ceremony?

 

[Sator]

Originally Posted by jinx05

Sator - Thank you for the insight. The ceremony is at 4:30pm. If I understand you correctly, a suit and black tie would be approproate since it is before 6pm...no? Thanks!
My preference would be a stroller in the US and for everywhere else morning dress: http://www.folchisformalwear.com/ima...Stroller_b.jpg Lounge suits are only fine if the bride is wearing an informal dress too. In other words you have to match to your bride. If she is wearing t-shirt and flip flops on the beach then you can wear them too. However, if she is wearing a formal wedding dress you have to match that by at least wearing a stroller. Lounge suits are too informal to match with a formal bridal dress. I know you will see lounge suits being worn with brides in full formal wedding dresses but from the point of view of the traditional rules this is a major faux pas. Sadly bridal magazines are full of all sorts of bizarre monstrosities such as peach coloured dinner jackets with notched lapels being worn in the middle of the day etc. The female fashion consultants who put those ensembles together clearly have no clue about menswear.

 

[Sator]

Oh BTW if you go for a stroller you should be in grey to mark you out as the groom but any other members of the wedding party should have a black coat.

 

[jinx05]

Sator -

Very helpful advice. Not only do I need to know what is appropriate, I also need to understand why. Thanks for explaining the rules.

Mr. Daniels - Jack is it? ;-)

The bride will be in formal attire. No vail though. Her dress is ivory. The ceremony will be outdoors in San Diego, Ca.

Thanks again!

 

[Sator]

Originally Posted by jinx05

Sator -

Very helpful advice. Not only do I need to know what is appropriate, I also need to understand why. Thanks for explaining the rules.

Mr. Daniels - Jack is it? ;-)

The bride will be in formal attire. No vail though. Her dress is ivory. The ceremony will be outdoors in San Diego, Ca.

Thanks again!

If you match the formality of the bridal dress with a grey stroller this will mark you out as being a class above the increasing number of day time weddings being held in the US with the men in the most bizarre so-called "tuxedoes".

If you really want to be ultra tradtional then you might consider morning dress:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Morning_dress

This is the most formal and traditional daytime attire for a man.

http://personales.ya.com/fororeal/ch...amilasalen.jpg

It has sadly become rare in the US but forum member say they have managed to find them. You can get nice vintage ones too - all you need is a 'cutaway' coat and you can get the waistcoat and striped trousers seperately.

 

[Sator]

Now I have recommended a stroller as a the best option for a daytime wedding in the US. I hesitate to push the issue with morning dress as some US members think I am trying to resurrect extinct dinosaurs.

Here are some dashing examples of morning dress done right:

The Duke of Windsor at his wedding:

Gary Cooper:

 

[jinx05]

Wow! This is really educational.

Great examples, too.

Thank you for your time!

Rhys

 

[odoreater]

Originally Posted by Sator

Now I have recommended a stroller as a the best option for a daytime wedding in the US. I hesitate to push the issue with morning dress as some US members think I am trying to resurrect extinct dinosaurs.


Count me in as one of the members that thinks you are trying to resurrect extinct dinosaurs. My general feeling is that a person should wear whatever they want because the rules simply do not apply anymore. But, as a matter of personal choice, I would tend to agree with you here that a black lounge suit would be a bad idea and that a stroller would be a good idea. Morning dress, on the other hand, would just make it look like you made everyone dress up in a costume - at least in the US.