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Good Natured Advice Thread (improving a business wardrobe)

Discussion in 'Classic Menswear' started by Claghorn, Jan 6, 2014.

  1. lordsuperb

    lordsuperb Senior member

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    What happened?
     
  2. GuP

    GuP Senior member

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    Don't want to dig up old stuff, but if you search around it is public.
     
  3. lordsuperb

    lordsuperb Senior member

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    I take it you tried to implement the liverano lapels and rounded quarters on your jacket?
     
  4. GuP

    GuP Senior member

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    How did you guess?
     
  5. WillingToLearn

    WillingToLearn Senior member

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  6. sprout2

    sprout2 Senior member

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    He asked for side buttoning yoga pants in bone flannel and they gave him ass pleats on oatmeal flannel instead.

    After requesting that the pants be recut and delivering them to a New York hotel suite in an unmarked brown paper bag, his hand-wringing and pleas were met with obfuscation for a year, over which time he was tarred and feathered on social media and insinuations were made that he was a height-challenged Mongoloid.

    Still, trusting the end product, he waited. Finally, the pants arrived and, like a child on Christmas Day, he eagerly tore open the paper wrapping with his house keys, but the fabric was all wrong. He immediately subjected it to a burn test and realized it contained polyester. What was billed as ancient thirst loomed by the Brothers Kitsune in the West of England turned out to be a Bollywood Special from West India.

    But what could he do? He was pant-less. Resolved to turn the situation for the better with a bit of retail therapy, he strode into the Parisian house of Mèrcury, purveyors of leather goods and cravats with witty motifs of smiling Kit-Kat bars, dancing swastikas, and aliens mating. A single green billfold in cowhide would, he reasoned, "fit the bill" for this occasion. What he couldn't get in thirst that was ancient he would compensate for with new cash that was Asian.

    "Sorry," the clerk jolted him out of his reverie. "I can't discuss that at this time," she said, cementing what would henceforth live on in the lexicon in the acronym we know as ICDTATT. He was nonplussed. This maison was a farce, a tower of rarity; it seemed to besmirch his purchasing power parity.

    When a man cannot have side buttons, when a man cannot have bone flannel, when a man cannot even have a four thousand dollar wallet with his name inked in the corner by loving Parisian hands (by way of Belarus), he can do but one thing: turn to drink.

    Long story short, he went to his favorite watering hole and somewhere in the proceedings, too inebriated to houdini the family jewels through the improperly placed side buttons (why, he cursed, had they used blazer buttons, of all things?), he sprinkled his "bespoke" hip-huggers, which by this time could honestly pass for Isaia MTM.

    The pants were lost. So was his ego. But no one stands between a man and cold, hard cash. The battle was Pyrrhic, but it was his battle.
    Before closing time, he squeaks through the sliding doors of Daffy's New York, buys the first pair of Incotex he can find. Goes home, snips off the labels, strings them onto the soiled bespoke pantaloons with a bit of fishing wire. Presto, change-o: merchandise that's priced to move! He lists it on ebay:

    [​IMG]NWT INCOTEX ANCIENT THIRST 28 EUR L$$K!![​IMG]
    Buy It Now: $79.

    An offer comes in: $25 shipped to Ulaanbataar.
    Implacable, he shoots back with a counter-bid: $35.
    The counter-offer: $30 to U.bataar, plus I'll offer you a J.Crew gift code.
    Bingo. Accept offer, bitches.

    Time to post on SF about how some sucker just bought my piss-stained pants and gave me a coupon for it.

    To be continued

    -------------------
    Postscript: book offers from publishers accepted at largesumsconsidered@brownisforfarmer.com
     
    11 people like this.
  7. Murlsquirl

    Murlsquirl Senior member Moderator

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    You are one odd duck :)
     
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  8. EliodA

    EliodA Senior member

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  9. sebastian mcfox

    sebastian mcfox Senior member

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    I want to pick up a couple of sleeveless cardigans to layer under suits next winter, I'm looking at burgundy and forest green - do you think these would be versatile?
     
  10. Cleav

    Cleav Senior member Moderator

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    Seb, sure. Forest Green in particular. A favourite brand of mine John Smedley, being particularly good.
     
    Last edited: Jan 8, 2016
  11. sebastian mcfox

    sebastian mcfox Senior member

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    Looking at the discounted S&C at Exquisite Trimmings, would they come recommended @Cleav? Thanks!
     
  12. Cleav

    Cleav Senior member Moderator

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    TBH I've never picked one up. That said they look great and anything Shaya stocks is always good.

    The John Smedleys that I have are a very fine merino wool, i'm wearing a cardigan now actually, and they certainly aren't bulky whilst giving an extra layer. Horses for courses I suppose....
     
  13. sebastian mcfox

    sebastian mcfox Senior member

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    Thanks mate :)
     
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  14. Murlsquirl

    Murlsquirl Senior member Moderator

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    I tried them on at Shaya's shop and they are really nice.  If you have an athletic body they are a bit bulky and odd looking in the waist...that's the only reason I didn't get one.

    I really liked Cleav's Smedleys.
     
    Last edited: Jan 8, 2016
    2 people like this.
  15. sprout2

    sprout2 Senior member

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    When going tieless and lunching in town
    A gilet is superb for dressing down
    Wear one with contrast, in green or tan
    And navy's a must for the discerning man
    Smedley is classic, but the fit is not right
    The placket's too narrow, the rib is too tight
    The polos are fine, but the gilets do enrage
    For a first-rate waistcoat, choose Drumohr -- in 30 gauge
     
    1 person likes this.
  16. Academic2

    Academic2 Senior member

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    Last edited: Jan 8, 2016
  17. sugarbutch

    sugarbutch Senior member Dubiously Honored

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  18. EliodA

    EliodA Senior member

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    Sounds better than WAYWRN.
     
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  19. upr_crust

    upr_crust Senior member

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    Rather more a series of selfies outlining the decline of Western civilization, but yes . . ..



    Are you suggesting that we re-title the thread to ASOTDOWC? :satisfied:
     
    1 person likes this.
  20. Claghorn

    Claghorn Senior member Dubiously Honored

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    I think I have the ability to do that. I also think the powers that be would be upset if I did so.
     
    2 people like this.

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