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Give your best advice to an expecting father

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by gdl203, Nov 10, 2008.

  1. DextersMorgan

    DextersMorgan Well-Known Member

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    Do not get ghetto with him and calling him to you by yelling out ," Boy! Come here!" Only dads on crack or those who only finnish the 5th grade talk like that.
     
  2. acidboy

    acidboy Senior member

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    congratulations!
     
  3. Gots1966

    Gots1966 New Member

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    Don't complain for lack of sleep because you have to get up and feed the baby. Time flies so fast and before you know it your child already has a world of their own.
     
  4. lawyerdad

    lawyerdad Senior member

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    Especially for girls.
     
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  5. MrG

    MrG Senior member

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    So, the missus and I were talking (entirely in the abstract) about what it would be like if we have another child. One thing we discussed was the fact that a major contributor to stress during our son's first year was the fact that we were all constantly sick from the daycare germs. After the first year, it got dramatically better for all of us, and now MrsG and I are ill much, much less frequently than we were during that year. Still more than we were before having a kid, but we so rarely got sick pre-kid that even a couple/few illnesses a year is more than we'd experienced before. LowerCaseG is also less prone to illness, although he's still got a little bit of something more often than we do (which is to be expected).

    All of this got us to wondering about what it's like with a second child. Obviously, just like LowerCaseG did, the new child will get sick all the time for the first year in a group setting, but have you guys with multiple kids found that you're better able to fight stuff off with kid two than kid one, or can we just pretty much plan on spending another year in illness misery? My inclination is that we won't get sick all the time like we did the first time around, since our bodies are already accustomed to the germ onslaught we've experienced with kid one, but I'd be interested to hear what you guys have experienced.
     
    Last edited: May 14, 2013
  6. NorCal

    NorCal Senior member

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    I'm a bit late to the party, but congratulations to you and your wife!
     
    1 person likes this.
  7. in stitches

    in stitches Senior member Moderator

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    belated congrats to you, M!
     
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  8. in stitches

    in stitches Senior member Moderator

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    very cool that you are considering going for more kids, G.

    ime, there was no influx of getting sick with kid #2 or #3, thank g-d. but tbh, i dont recall that happening to us with kid #1 either. maybe we were lucky? in any case, i endorse you having a second child, if that is worth anything, obviously i wont be the one charged with the child's upbringing so its easy for me to say go for it.

    even if ya'll get sick for a bit, the joy is beyond worth it imo. one of the things we enjoy the most about having more than one child is seeing the siblings play so well with each other. beyond the relief of the kids having what do without needing us all the time, seeing siblings that you brought into the world who love and appreciate each other is a tremendous thing to behold. i truly feel blessed to have kids that get along so well.

    whatever you do, i know you guys will be doing the right thing. i have seen your posts about family and clearly you guys are great parents who understand what it means to have kids and what factors into these important decisions.
     
  9. NorCal

    NorCal Senior member

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  10. emptym

    emptym Senior member Moderator

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    Thanks guys! R, we did get a mattress. Just a spring one. Couldn't find a good latex one, but I should have thought of Foamorder. Plus, latex ones ones are significantly heavier than spring ones and we read that it can be a pain to change sheets on a heavy mattress in the middle of the night when the little one has an accident.
     
  11. globetrotter

    globetrotter Senior member

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    my experience is that after the first kid we didn't get sick anywhere near as much, as a matter of fact, the twins didn't get sick anywhere near as much as their older brother. the whole daycare thing might be a once for a family event. but fuck, I was so sick that year.
     
  12. acidboy

    acidboy Senior member

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    how's it going, m? looks like fatherhood has brought you to a new light.
     
  13. MrG

    MrG Senior member

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    Yes, m, give us an update!

    (And add me to the list of people wishing you a belated congrats!)


    We never thought we'd stop at one. Truth be told, MrsG would probably have half a dozen if I were amenable to it, but I'm not inclined to do so. I love being a father, but I don't have any desire to have a litter. That said, I do want my son to have a sibling, both because I value my relationship with mine and because I'm afraid he'd end up with entitled-center-of-the-universe-only-child syndrome. That all being the case, when/if the next child is coming has become a big topic in our house, given I don't want them to end up being five or six years apart in age.

    Getting sick definitely isn't going to stop us from having another one if we decide we want to. It was just something that came up as part of a bigger discussion on what it was like the first time around, and that made me think to ask what others experienced. If you didn't have it with kid #1, count yourself lucky. It was awful. Hands down the hardest part of my son's first year.


    This is good to hear, thanks. One thing I think of is the teachers we know who've had kids. They fared dramatically better during their kids' first year than we did with ours because they'd already spent a bunch of time around sick kids during the beginning of their career. Using that logic, I figure it should be easier with kid #2, and it sounds like that's the case.

    And, yeah, it was staggering how sick we were for that first year.
     
    Last edited: May 17, 2013
    1 person likes this.
  14. in stitches

    in stitches Senior member Moderator

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    very good stuff, G. we definitely count ourselves lucky. although, its entirely possible only i didnt get sick and that is my memory, and my wife might have very different take on that entirely, but i think my memory is working on this one.

    best of luck to you guys on this decision.

    big plus one to "entitled-center-of-the-universe-only-child syndrome" being a reason to want more than one. though i do know quite a few only children that do not have that syndrome at all. good parents can remove that if they are aware of the potential issue, imo.

    lastly, my wife is a firm believer that children should be more than 2 years apart, because she feels that it removes a good bit of the competition. lots of phycology there that i dont want to get into, but i dont totally agree. my younger brother is 22 months my junior, and while we are SUPER competitive with each other, and certainly have had our ups and downs, we do have a relationship that i cherish deeply, and would love for my children to experience that.
     

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