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  1. Oddly Familiar

    Oddly Familiar Senior member

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    Just recently, I witnessed what I beleive to be true love between one of my best friends and his girlfriend of 6 months, and I didn't beleive it to exist at my age. Well, an old boyfriend came up. Several times, actually, and she supposidly cheated on my friend with him. My friend found out, and needless to say, he was devestated. Me, being the good friend that I am, went to his house today, and we just chilled for a little while. Smoked a little of that 'dro we had lying around and watched garden state. He is depressed. Severely depressed, and now I'm seeking your advice once again. When a friend has gone through something like that, what are the best ways to help him over her? I've gone through some bad break ups myself, but none of them where as bad as this one. Any advice is appreciated.
     


  2. Brian SD

    Brian SD Moderator

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    I've heard people say a million different things but the best thing I have ever seen is just to do things you know they already love. For example, I fucking LOVE that cartoon Futurama, and no matter what it always puts me in a good mood. If they have a favorite video game or if there's a sport or something..

    Trying to go out and bone a billion different girls *only makes it worse*

    The other thing is to help him realize that if he pays too much attention to his depressed state and tries hard to feel better, he's just going to sink deeper. If you think calmly to yourself, "why bother trying to feel better. all it needs is time," you'd be surprised how much better it feels.

    Anyway this is stuff that I went through fairly recently, and while I didnt actually get cheated on - and the ending for me is happy (nabbed the girl, I win, haha) I completely understand the feeling of depression that comes out of this.
     


  3. LA Guy

    LA Guy Opposite Santa Staff Member Admin Moderator

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    Shit like that happens to everyone. Just be there to chill out with him and listen to him bitch and moan without giving any advice. He'll eventually get over it - eventually being the key word. If he finds someone else (and not just a random hookup), you'll be amazed how quickly he'll recover. Otherwise, he could be in for a long "eventually".
     


  4. visionology

    visionology Senior member

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    My friend in December was devastated over a breakup and coincidentally I broke up with my GF of 4 years in december as well. I took mine much better than his, however. When I heard how he was feeling I gave him a call and made sure we hang out, he was able to let his feelings out and get over the whole mess. Thats what good friends are for. I think just having a friend close to talk to makes life a whole lot easier and eventually it will blow over when he realizes that there really other other women out there, lots of them.
     


  5. wallateer

    wallateer Well-Known Member

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    Yep, there are other women out there. They just keep making more!

    But seriously, just hang out with him like the other posters here having been saying. Don't try to correct him or offer advice or get him to jump into anything new right away. Just listen. Encourage him to go out with you and your other buddies, not necessarily to meet girls, but just to hang out.

    These things tend to work themselves out, given enough time.
     


  6. imageWIS

    imageWIS Senior member

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    To cheer him up you should kill the chick and bring him her heart on a platter; that will definitely cheer him up.

    On second thought, just be there for him and realize there's nothing you can do but be there for him.

    Jon.
     


  7. Matt

    Matt [email protected]

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    Shit like that happens to everyone. Just be there to chill out with him and listen to him bitch and moan without giving any advice. He'll eventually get over it - eventually being the key word. If he finds someone else (and not just a random hookup), you'll be amazed how quickly he'll recover. Otherwise, he could be in for a long "eventually".
    yup spot on Fok.

    We have all been there.

    If you havent yet Oddly, rest assured, its coming.

    Theres not much you can do, just hang out, listen to him whine and nod a lot - theres nothing you can say that will help, so just let him have his time.

    An old friend used to say 'the best remedy for pussy lost is pussy found' - and there's merit in it, especially at your age, the next one makes you forget the last one.

    Ive got a mate back home who moped for years over a girl who he caught fucking...wait for this...his dad's heart surgeon. He may well still be crying over that one....
     


  8. Oddly Familiar

    Oddly Familiar Senior member

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    I've been there before, but I just didn't know what I should say when she comes up.
     


  9. Vaclav

    Vaclav Senior member

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    Tell him to choose 1 song that makes him remember, and put it on repeat.

    All the night and day he should listen.

    This is the true advice,perhaps already he knows.
     


  10. Matt

    Matt [email protected]

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    Tell him to choose 1 song that makes him remember, and put it on repeat.

    All the night and day he should listen.

    This is the true advice,perhaps already he knows.

    yup i did that too [​IMG]
     


  11. Arethusa

    Arethusa Senior member

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    I think that's just a great way to end up hating a song.
     


  12. aybojs

    aybojs Senior member

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    Read Arthur Schopenhauer's Essay "On Women." Very politically incorrect, but pretty accurate. Don't waste your time.
     


  13. LA Guy

    LA Guy Opposite Santa Staff Member Admin Moderator

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    Tell him to choose 1 song that makes him remember, and put it on repeat.

    All the night and day he should listen.

    This is the true advice,perhaps already he knows.


    Been there, done that. More than once.
     


  14. LA Guy

    LA Guy Opposite Santa Staff Member Admin Moderator

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    I think that's just a great way to end up hating a song.

    Nah. Unless you are someone who really won't let things go, if you hear that song years later, you'll feel slightly nostalgic and think "Shit, that happened a long time ago..."
     


  15. jay allen

    jay allen Well-Known Member

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    Whenever this happened to me, as a much younger guy, I would nail everything in site. Some people drink, others play video games, etc......I chose to get as much tail as humanly possible. If she was cheating on him she really wasn't much was she? I could see being crushed if your girl decided you weren't right for her.....or became a nun/lesbian/transexual, but she was fucking someone else. Come on....get pissed, get laid, get over it. There are approx. 3 BILLION women in the world. It is highly unlikely she was the only one that is interesting, smart, and sexy. Just be glad you found out NOW that she can't keep her pants on. You dodged a bullet....
     


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