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Girl Issue

JesseJB

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I have three rowdy college buddys that I havent seen in 6 months crashing tonight through Sunday in my one bedroom apartment. My girlfriend of 3 months is flying in from St Louis from a week long vacation with her family and wants me to spend the night at her place since the last thing she wants is to come home to four rowdy dudes. On top of this, Im hosting a rager on New Years Eve. And on top of THAT, one of my buddys is trying to get an apartment here and informed me just today he needs to crash for 2 MORE WEEKS. (He crashed for a week when he was here for interviews back in late November).

I havent seen these other guys in a long time and they are expecting to hang out.

1. Me and my girlfriend have literally not been alone for more than 15 minutes at a time in the last 6 weeks. We had a night planned before she took off to St Louis last week but it was promptly interrupted 20 minutes into it by 5 of my friends at the door wanting to out to get beers and food.

2. My friends alone in my apartment is such a bad idea. They are insane. If I go to my girlfriends place Im going to be totally worried the entire time that all my glass furniture has been pulverized.


What the bloody hell do I do? I have 1 hour to figure it out. I haven't been in a real relationship in like 5 years so I forgot how this shit works.
 

robin

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Kick the friends to the curb. I'm guessing you don't have sex with them.
 

appolyon

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I think Robin has the right idea. What happened on the night your five mates showed up at the door? You ended up going out with them? ... can't see the gf being to pleased about that.
 

JesseJB

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When they showed up I was ready to say "not tonight" but my girlfriend was hungry and wanted to go out. I didnt expect that at all.

Normally things are pretty calm but once the holidays roll around shit just get absolutely insane with people staying at my place and partying (Im centrally located as shit!) and I'm trying to comfort her in the knowledge that it'll be over soon but tonight is one of those tests...
 

johnapril

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The half life on college buddies is very, very short. Tell them to go fuck themselves and enjoy your time with the girl, while it lasts.
 

Eason

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Originally Posted by robin
Kick the friends to the curb. I'm guessing you don't have sex with them.

robin has the key here

Jesse how easy is it for you to make friends? You get like 10 a week. How easy is it for you to find a gf worth keeping?
 

BYucko

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To play the devil's advocate,

Bros before hoes, man.
 

Davidko19

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I find that college buddies are the guys who you keep your relationships with the longest.

I subscribe to the bros before hoes policy. I only see any of my friends that dont live in town once a year if Im lucky and thats usually on tight schedules and not for the best reasons (funerals?). Girls come and go man. Dont be such a puss, "woe is me, I havent been with her for more than 15 minutes!", "Waahh!!! I havent been in a relationship for 5 years!".

Grow some man you sound like a puss. I can smell your lack of confidence so she can definetly tell she can get away with pushing you around. you'll put up with it for a year or two and then get out. Hang with your boys.

EDIT: OR, best of both worlds, hang out with both groups. It takes a suave fella to pull that. Suggest you go out for dinner and drinks to appease both groups if you dont want to/cant choose.
 

appolyon

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This is not a broes before hoez thing I say ... if you have made plans with the girl then stick with them.
 

slycedbred

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Originally Posted by Davidko19
I find that college buddies are the guys who you keep your relationships with the longest.

I subscribe to the bros before hoes policy. I only see any of my friends that dont live in town once a year if Im lucky and thats usually on tight schedules and not for the best reasons (funerals?). Girls come and go man. Dont be such a puss, "woe is me, I havent been with her for more than 15 minutes!", "Waahh!!! I havent been in a relationship for 5 years!".

Grow some man you sound like a puss. I can smell your lack of confidence so she can definetly tell she can get away with pushing you around. you'll put up with it for a year or two and then get out. Hang with your boys.

EDIT: OR, best of both worlds, hang out with both groups. It takes a suave fella to pull that. Suggest you go out for dinner and drinks to appease both groups if you dont want to/cant choose.


lack of confidence? your skills of inference fail
 

unjung

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Originally Posted by JesseJB
1. Me and my girlfriend have literally not been alone for more than 15 minutes at a time in the last 6 weeks. We had a night planned before she took off to St Louis last week but it was promptly interrupted 20 minutes into it by 5 of my friends at the door wanting to out to get beers and food.
You owe your girlfriend.
Originally Posted by JesseJB
2. My friends alone in my apartment is such a bad idea. They are insane. If I go to my girlfriends place Im going to be totally worried the entire time that all my glass furniture has been pulverized.
Friends who might break your shit aren't friends. However, you have the problem of not having a clear favorite, and not being able to bring the two together. I don't see this going well in the long-term, because she'll never be cool with those guys. Is it possible to spend the first part of the evening with her, and then head back to your boys after dinner and happy-cuddle time with the lady? You may need to choose. Also, why do you not see your girlfriend more often? If this is a long-distance relationship, that's an issue. If you're going to be back in the same city as her in a week, promise her a weekend and make it special. However, this does underscore an important point. I see my four best friends in this city more than once a week - often three times. So they need to approve of my girlfriends. And vice-versa. If one of us gets serious, we'll all back off. And my buddies don't break my stuff.
 

JesseJB

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They don't break stuff per se, but they are the types where shit is just going to happen. (noise complaints, namely). Ill be with them until about 10pm when my girlfriend gets home and Ill head over there. Im hoping everyone might be wound down by then.
 

hadamulletonce

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Originally Posted by appolyon
This is not a broes before hoez thing I say ... if you have made plans with the girl then stick with them.

+1

If you've made plans with your girlfriend, keep them. It doesn't sound like you're getting pushed around to me. It sounds like you miss your GF but fear your buddies will destroy your place. If this is the case, let them hang somewhere else. Guys that you can't trust with your things aren't really Bro's.
 

Joffrey

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I really have no time for friends that dissapear once they get a whiff of regular 'poon. You need to be a man and manage the situation.

By the way, are they your college buddies or your good friends? I really can't see why they can't calm the fuck down for a few nights while you split your time with them and your girl. If they start shit, they need to get a hotel. You all aren't in college anymore.
 

JesseJB

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Originally Posted by Jodum5
I really have no time for friends that dissapear once they get a whiff of regular 'poon. You need to be a man and manage the situation.

By the way, are they your college buddies or your good friends? I really can't see why they can't calm the fuck down for a few nights while you split your time with them and your girl. If they start shit, they need to get a hotel. You all aren't in college anymore.


All three are college buddies. I see two of them about twice a year and one of them quite often and he's moving into my building this weekend actually.

Im going to talk to them about chilling up for the night while I take care of business.

What isn't too encouraging is that I just now found out they are bringing a goddamn beer pong table which I quickly told them NO FUCKING WAY.

This is scaring the shit out of me...
 

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