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Five sheets is not enough - the official clean ass thread

frenchy

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Originally Posted by Dakota rube
Why do people look at boogers they pick out of their noses?

i already have enough of my own unanswered questions thank you
 

Monaco

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scrunching the paper is just a waste, when I was a kid I used to wrap it around my hand like 10 times, wipe it once and throw it away. Now that I'm older and more frugal, I try to get as many wipes as I can from a 3 sheet fold.

BTW, it's not weird to look at your poop when you're done. I like to congratulate myself on a job well done after wards.
 

frenchy

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Originally Posted by Monaco
scrunching the paper is just a waste, when I was a kid I used to wrap it around my hand like 10 times, wipe it once and throw it away. Now that I'm older and more frugal, I try to get as many wipes as I can from a 3 sheet fold.

BTW, it's not weird to look at your poop when you're done. I like to congratulate myself on a job well done after wards.





just dont shake the hand you just wiped with
 

e0d9n0b5

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gotta say, i love this thread. everything i would say has already been said.
 

Cognacad

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Fuck I was going to do the first reply in this thread but I am glad I waited, I love it. Every forum goes through this stage, and I am sure others have to.

How many sheets?
Standing or sitting?
Scrunch or fold?
Front to back or back to front?
Shower or no shower?
Touch the toilet seat or hover?

What will really tickle your fancys later is when someone asks if guys pee with their balls in or out of their underwear. Hilarity ensues!
 

Monaco

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Originally Posted by Cognacad
Fuck I was going to do the first reply in this thread but I am glad I waited, I love it. Every forum goes through this stage, and I am sure others have to.

How many sheets?
Standing or sitting?
Scrunch or fold?
Front to back or back to front?
Shower or no shower?
Touch the toilet seat or hover?

What will really tickle your fancys later is when someone asks if guys pee with their balls in or out of their underwear. Hilarity ensues!


it has to be balls out...just sayin...
 

stevester1

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Originally Posted by Cognacad
What will really tickle your fancys later is when someone asks if guys pee with their balls in or out of their underwear. Hilarity ensues!

Over the fence or through the gate?
 

mundieTRAINS

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On a side note - favorite wiping hand?

I literally cannot wipe my ass with my left hand. Can't find the target
 

brad-t

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Originally Posted by word
We are cheap bastards.



Also, why the fuck do you guys take showers after a shit. wtf? Do you squeeze your ass cheeks together while dropping a turd so it smears all over yourself? Or do you have a wild jungle of ass hair that catch dingleberries every time? Please tell me that your internal clock just times your shits to happen before your already routine shower.


ahahahahahahah
 

frenchy

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Originally Posted by mundieTRAINS
On a side note - favorite wiping hand?

I literally cannot wipe my ass with my left hand. Can't find the target


this thread has officially jumped the turd...i mean shark
 

e0d9n0b5

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Originally Posted by CrazyJew
The biggest shit I ever took reared itself above the toilet water almost half a foot, so I took a picture of it and showed it to my friends at work. I was really proud of myself.

post it!
 

HRoi

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how do you use a bidet anyway? i'm deathly afraid of getting my clothes completely soaked. i'm talking about the ones that spray water straight up to the ceiling (not sure if there are any other kind)...?
 

frenchy

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Originally Posted by CrazyJew
The biggest shit I ever took reared itself above the toilet water almost half a foot, so I took a picture of it and showed it to my friends at work. I was really proud of myself.

was it kosher?
 

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