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Favourite euphemisms?

Britalian

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Words or phrases, ridiculously ultra-PC, ironically old-fash. etc...
 

coatandthai

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"I could care less." WTF does that mean?
"pre-owned." Oh, I guess that's better than used.
"odor and wetness." I suppose that's different than stanky and sweaty.
"feminine hygiene." 'Nuff said.
"toilet paper." Beats "butt wipes."
 

GQgeek

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heard this one for the first time last week (i know too many gay ppl)...

fag hag: "A fag hag is a straight girl that is best friends with a gay guy.
Usually earlier on they are in love with them before they find out they are gay
but then they just turn into best friends and friends.
Sometimes it takes them a while to get over the fact that the love of their life is a faggot....however they deal with it and eventually get on with their own love life. But only if the guy they date is alright with fags."
 

Huntsman

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I reserve a special disdain for the way individual words get dragged into euphemism, but little phrases can be very elegant and witty. My favorite:

"...and did he enjoy the usufructs of gallantry?"

- Rex Stout as Nero Wolfe

Regards,
Huntsman
 

hopkins_student

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Originally Posted by GQgeek
But only if the guy they date is alright with fags."

That's pretty funny.
 

GQgeek

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Originally Posted by hopkins_student
That's pretty funny.

Direct quote from a gay guy who's balls I was busting (figuratively) for not hooking me up with a fag hag. He was trying to convince me that i should move to the gay village b/c then i would be "in" with gay people and gain access to their straight female friends. Gotta love montreal...
 

EL72

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Originally Posted by GQgeek
Direct quote from a gay guy who's balls I was busting (figuratively) for not hooking me up with a fag hag. He was trying to convince me that i should move to the gay village b/c then i would be "in" with gay people and gain access to their straight female friends. Gotta love montreal...

He's right; it's very good advice.
 

whodini

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Originally Posted by EL72
He's right; it's very good advice.
My gay friends always want me to hang out with them on their home turf (aka WeHo, not the other kind) exactly for this reason. Girls will go with their gay friends to bars because they know the likelihood of being hit on is slim to nil. May not be the best way to pick up on girls, especially if they're there to avoid exactly what I'm doing, but it does work. I've always liked telling someone "catch you next tuesday" in public than just calling them a cunt.
 

Britalian

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Originally Posted by Aaron
Huh? I've never heard that one.

Are we in Derek and Clive (Cook and Moore) territory here?

Derek (or Clive, can't recall): 'Hello, Colin. How's the wife?' etc etc .. 'Ok then see you soon. {Colin leaves} Cunt!'
 

Britalian

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I've always found the word 'restroom' as a euphemism for 'toilet' highly amusing. Whenever I'm around Americans or indeed in the US I insist on asking for directions to the latter.
I like 'easy on the eye' for 'attractive, beautiful, gorgeous (woman)'
 

RJman

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"Got to see a man about a dog"
"Got to drain the weasel" (this one's my invention, hm, how would it be in Freedom? egoutter la fouine?).
 

King Salmon

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Surprise sex.
 

Saucemaster

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Originally Posted by GQgeek
heard this one for the first time last week (i know too many gay ppl)...

fag hag:


If the first time you heard "fag hag" was last week, I think if anything you know too *few* gay people....
 

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