20% of all Americans don't know who their real Daddy is anyway. Sucks, doesn't it? I dont think so. I never knew my biological father or what he looked like, never had much desire to anyway. I was adopted as a result of a long custody battle and have a wonderfull familly. I dont get why people say "real ____" What makes them more real than a dad who raised you? Nurture over nature I always say. I hate to think of the person I would have become had I been raised by my birth mother. As for the poster of this thread. I would advise to keep on dating this woman, but let her know that you want to build a wall between you and the kid. Have little to no contact with him/her untill you get serious with this woman. It would be a horrible thing for the kid to become attracted to you and see you as a father figure only to have you break up with the woman and never to be seen again. Just limit yourself at first and things will work out for the best no matter what you decide.