Embarassing Sports Plays

[edinatlanta]

When I was playing college rugby in Australia I blocked several kicks, but with my head.

A few years ago I was playing rugby in Atlanta and had missed most of the season and started to take up refereeing. I spoke with this particular ref for a while before the game trying to learn more about what to look for etc during a match, he knew I knew the rules and all that. So anyway, it is the last match of the autumn season and we were decisively beating this team and I went in for the last few minutes. I hadn't played in several months and was dying to tackle someone. Unfortunately I never got the chance, I was too out of shape to be effective. Well a penalty was called and play had clearly stopped except dude had stopped running and was slowing down as he approached me. I could have let him go, instead I blindsided him and drove him to the ground. The ref had the most confused look on his face and said "what are you doing?" as did the rest of our team and supporters. Worth it.

 

[Texasmade]

I was in football practice and we were doing 7 on 7 coverage drills. The QB throws an incomplete pass and since I was the closest guy to the football I go and get it. I throw it to the RB who wasn't paying attention and it hits him right in the nuts. He's on the ground rolling around in pain and I'm about to die from laughter. The guy ended up missing the rest of practice.

 

[gomestar]

varsity ice hockey during my freshman year:

zipping through center ice with my head up to avoid being creamed, I mishandle the puck but I don't notice in time. I end up stepping right on it, slipping, then cascading down to the ice like a bunch of Jenga blocks (but teeth saved by the face mask).

Although I was a forward, I oftend played the point on the power play. One game, some guy zips the puck along the far boards and I race to keep it in the zone. I get there, but something was up with the ice, I slip and although I regain my balance, I do an awkwardly long "I can't skate!!" dance that is only seen in 40-50 year old dads trying to ice skate for the first time. I was at the bench later and one of my coaches asked "buuuut ... wtf was with that little prance on the blue line, you looked like a little panzy out there"

 

[Augusto86]

Possibly slightly different, but last week @ capoeira I kicked a girl in the face when I came up from an esquiva into a kick and she was going blind the other direction.

Some blood but fortunately no permanent damage!

 

[Piobaire]

About 1996, cycling club ride early Saturday morning. It was just suppposed to be a light breakfast ride, like 20 miles to grub, eat, cycle back. So I go out drinking Friday night, thinking no probs as to the ride.

I show up, and find out I had read the club schedule wrong. Century ride through the Irish Hills of sourthern Michigan. Oh joy. However, I man up and go. I feel like ****, feel like puking...no doubt dehydrated from the start, so I'm drinking water pretty freely due to dry mouth. We hit the breakfast place, and I eat a healthy meal. I'm thinking I'm going to make it.

Twenty minutes later, we're in a really hilly section. I feel like I'm going to puke up that tasty breakfast I just had. I stand up to proj up the hill. My cleat slips out of the pedal and I land nuts first on the crossbar. Hard. Yeah, I puked up that breakfast.

On the person cycling next to me.

 

[gomestar]

Originally Posted by Piobaire

My cleat slips out of the pedal and I land nuts first on the crossbar.

this happened when I raced in college, but I had clipless pedals. I tweak my leg a little bit so my foot detaches from the pedal, not a big deal, I'm standing and quickly go to click back in, but I whiff, slip, and land on the bar. but thankfully my pelvic bone was cushioned by my nuts

 

[Piobaire]

Originally Posted by gomestar

this happened when I raced in college, but I had clipless pedals. I tweak my leg a little bit so my foot detaches from the pedal, not a big deal, I'm standing and quickly go to click back in, but I whiff, slip, and land on the bar. but thankfully my pelvic bone was cushioned by my nuts

Yeah, was clipless too. I thought I was clipped in, but soon as I stood and put weight on it...

At least I've never done the "TIMBER!" thing of not clipping out at a stop. Seen it dozens of times though, and never ceases to be funny.

 

[gomestar]

Originally Posted by Piobaire

At least I've never done the "TIMBER!" thing of not clipping out at a stop. Seen it dozens of times though, and never ceases to be funny.

haha, always a scene to cherish. Or, somebody is going at quite a speed and then stops for traffic or something and clips out. They forget they're in a massive gear at the start, can't gain momentum to clip back in, fall, curse, get up, adjust the gears on the bike while somebody holds it up, gets back on, and finally gets back to riding.

 

[Thomas]

Originally Posted by Piobaire

Yeah, was clipless too. I thought I was clipped in, but soon as I stood and put weight on it...

At least I've never done the "TIMBER!" thing of not clipping out at a stop. Seen it dozens of times though, and never ceases to be funny.

Have done "TIMBER!" often enough to hang up the cleats.

At least with running, no one's really watching you. One morning I was out early putting in some mileage and really dragging on the trip home. My feet are barely coming up from the sidewalk and one foot catches a seam - it slowly dawns on me that I'm falling forward and I curl up a bit, roll onto my knee and arm, then roll forward back up onto my feet. Keep running under the streetlamps, get home, shower, tend to my wounds.

Then there are the improvised pit stops when you HAVE to take care of business: tuck into a shady area in the neighborhood (usually along a fenceline), hope there's no dogs around. Dog barking at 4 a.m. --> Homeowner wakes up and turns on floodlights --> Thomas hops around to find another hiding place while completing his business.

 

[whiteslashasian]

Originally Posted by Thomas

Have done "TIMBER!" often enough to hang up the cleats. At least with running, no one's really watching you. One morning I was out early putting in some mileage and really dragging on the trip home. My feet are barely coming up from the sidewalk and one foot catches a seam - it slowly dawns on me that I'm falling forward and I curl up a bit, roll onto my knee and arm, then roll forward back up onto my feet. Keep running under the streetlamps, get home, shower, tend to my wounds. Then there are the improvised pit stops when you HAVE to take care of business: tuck into a shady area in the neighborhood (usually along a fenceline), hope there's no dogs around. Dog barking at 4 a.m. --> Homeowner wakes up and turns on floodlights --> Thomas hops around to find another hiding place while completing his business.
lol, good story. I had a bad incident with my first ever XC race. We got to the meet late and barely had time to stretch/do a warm up run before the start of the race. I had a mild urge to go #2 but decided to run instead. Halfway through the race that mild urge turned into panic as I didn't want to turn into THIS GUY (probably NSFW). I had to clench my cheeks tight the rest of the 1.5 miles left and when I finally got to the finish line I asked for the closest restroom, about 500 feet away.... ....FFFFFFFUUUUUUU

That was the worst XC 5k of my life. Ever since then my body somehow knows I'm I'm preparing to do something physically intensive, like hit the gym or go for a run, etc and I get an urge to poo. I ALWAYS follow that urge now.