- Oct 14, 2008
- Reaction score
Hello everyone, I would appreciate feedback on this question... I am an office worker (when employed). I work in the field of engineering, as a CAD Operator (Computer Drafting) Let me share with you some moments. (I know, I know...'when in Rome, do as Romans do'....) Basically, I am generally one paycheck away from bankruptcy, as most people are. I be poor. There, I have said it. But the world of Thrift Shopping has allowed me to enjoy clothes and shoes, that would otherwise be completely un-reachable to me. Today, I can dress like James Bond I am deeply grateful to the wealthy who donate their clothes to these stores, or share otherwise. The results of my new wardrobe (and ever-respectful behaviour), have gleened powerful reactions. Part ONE...On the 'up' side... 1) wherever I go, day or night, women, even younger women, are much nicer to me, and even agreeable in conversation. (I am in my mid-40's) Are they only seeing the illusion of wealth and sucking up?2) When I go into a high-brow clothing store, sales staff are ever-so friendly and accomidating. (especially when seeing the 'Burberry' tag on my trenchcoat; a Salvation Army Thrift Store find) It's just like that scene from the movie 'Pretty Woman' where Richard Gere is telling the store attendant that he will be spending obscene amounts of money..note the attendants response) 3) Most of the women in any office I work in, are very nice and shower me with compliments. but now... Part TWO...The 'Down-side'. I am getting some very negative reactions too.. Now to preface this portion of the thread, I want to state, that as I have been, and continue to be poor (monetarily), I have always observed and employed my very best behaviour to everyone I meet or work with. I show an abiding respect for others, and show my humility at all times. yes...some regard that as 'weakness'.. So..the negative reactions.. A) The men who DO say something about my clothes, give me comments like: 'What are you dressing up for? No one dresses like THAT every day' or 'going to a job interview?' or 'What's with the tie everyday man...lose the ties already!' or 'Crap! How many pairs of shoes do you own!!' or 'You got balls man. You dress better than the boss!' B) The company partners/owners/bosses, are much nicer, but still...I get some glaring stares; almost resentful, as though they were saying with their eyes, 'just who do you think you are, slave?' One of the supervisors one day, at the coffee machine, (we were alone) very nicely said, 'You know, you really don't have to dress up every day..casual is fine here' What I 'felt' him saying was, 'Look you pretentious little bastard, you're making the rest of us look like the slobs we are, and we will resent you for it, so tone it down'. Part THREE ...How I have responded..... IF someone compliments my clothes, I generally say, 'Oh, thank you (with a smile)'..and then add, 'I also love your oufit/blouse/dress/shoes too!' 'Well Thanks Bill (Steve, John, etc) and smile. I NEVER 'Name-Drop' the brand names unless asked. I don't ever want to make anyone feel inferior by name-dropping, or make myself look lke an arrogant creep. again....humility all the way. If a BOSS questions my dressing up, or asks why am I 'doing this'.. I simply reply, 'Well William, I always give my best efforts to you (which is true), and part of that is to show respect for myself and the company I work for. You bring important clients to the office, and I feel that I can contribute, by representing this firm by conduct and clothes, as well as my work. IF a client sees nicely appointed staff, it shows prosperity and therefore encourages confidence to the client, which may help business. Lastly, If I get REPEATED negative comments from a co-worker, (typically some jealous male) I FEEL like saying... 'Look you stupid ass...understand this ok...I am NOT here to impress YOU. I am here to impress my Employers' But what I ACTUALLY will say is, (in a lowered voice, like I am sharing a sceret) 'You know Greg, with the economy the way it is, let me share something with you...'the interview' is never overmeaning never slide on your work, appearance, or behaviour..because we are all replaceable....and ..if you want, anytime you like after work, I'd be happy to share some dressing tips with you..you know, like how to shine your shoes, or iron a shirt (wink) 'Remember Greg, you have to 'teach' people how to treat you. (more winks to him) If you dress like a poor slob, they'll treat you like one, but if you make a little effort to dress better, they WILL notice, and appreciate it; Now I never tell a man what to do, but I am always happy to share what I have learned.' To a woman who hammered on me for dressing up... I FELT like saying, 'Look *****...you spent $30,000 on that CAR of yours, $300,000 on that HOUSE of yours.....and you're dogging me for wearing a Canali shirt and Church's shoes? What I ACTUALLY said was, 'Well (half-laugh & lowered voice), you know Stella, I don't have a house, car or kids, and this is the only luxury in my life, so I hope you won't resent me for it. And, you get to enjoy it more than I do, I mean, its more fun to look at nice clothes, than to spend all of ones money buying and maintaining it all.(winks) Now THAT response usually turns her around...because she'll soften and even agree with me, that its just too expensive to maintain it all..whew! OK...... Now its YOUR turn everyoneIs it OK to dress better than the Boss? Do we poor folk have the 'right' to dress nicely every day? What are YOUR comebacks, responses, adventures? Please comment and/or add to this post, because I really need your input, as you here, are the real masters of fine clothing and what to do,when,where, etc. Thank you for your time reading this.