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Dogs Are Better Than Wives

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by bachbeet, Nov 12, 2008.

  1. bachbeet

    bachbeet Senior member

    Messages:
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    Location:
    San Diego
    Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:

    1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see
    you.

    2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

    3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

    4. A dog's parents never visit.

    5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your
    point across.

    6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24
    hours a day.

    7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

    8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

    9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died,
    would you get another dog?"

    10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and
    give them away.

    11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without
    calling you a pervert.

    12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad.
    They just think it's interesting.

    13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

    And last, but not least:

    14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.
     
  2. kwilkinson

    kwilkinson Senior member

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    I think this list should convince Kunk to get a dog regardless of how his wife feels.
     
  3. JayJay

    JayJay Senior member

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    I think this list should convince Kunk to get a dog regardless of how his wife feels.
    +1
     
  4. forsbergacct2000

    forsbergacct2000 Senior member

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  5. X-It

    X-It Senior member

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    But... Why some WOMEN have DOGS and not HUSBANDS?

    - Life's too short to commit to someone you will need to know over time. [​IMG]

    - A dog is less critical, far more polite, less demanding, and far more loving. [​IMG]

    Some women have dogs and not husbands = Dogs are better than husbands. [​IMG]
     
  6. merkur

    merkur Senior member

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  7. Fuuma

    Fuuma Senior member

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    There a canine beauty salon near my place called "doggy style".
     
  8. lakewolf

    lakewolf Senior member

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    Zurich, Switzerland
    But... Why some WOMEN have DOGS and not HUSBANDS?

    - Life's too short to commit to someone you will need to know over time. [​IMG]

    - A dog is less critical, far more polite, less demanding, and far more loving. [​IMG]

    Some women have dogs and not husbands = Dogs are better than husbands. [​IMG]


    DOGS can lick it real good
     
  9. Flieger

    Flieger Senior member

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    how do you know?
     
  10. X-It

    X-It Senior member

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    Aren't all bitches the same?

    Aren't all assholes the same?

    There a canine beauty salon near my place called "doggy style".

    Euh? [​IMG]

    DOGS can lick it real good

    Nay! Dogs never say never again! [​IMG]
     
  11. BDC2823

    BDC2823 Senior member

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    how do you know?

    Do you really want to know his answer?
     
  12. MetroStyles

    MetroStyles Senior member

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  13. X-It

    X-It Senior member

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    how do you know?

    Curieuze-neus! [​IMG]

    Do you really want to know his answer?

    Euhm... [​IMG]
     
  14. edmorel

    edmorel Senior member Dubiously Honored

    Messages:
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    Location:
    NYC
    But... Why some WOMEN have DOGS and not HUSBANDS?


    - A dog is less critical, far more polite, less demanding, and far more loving. [​IMG]


    X-It, the kind of loving I would give you would make a dog vomit.
     
  15. zjpj83

    zjpj83 Senior member

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    Last I checked, you don't have to pick up your wife's shit. Unless your in to that.
     
  16. redcaimen

    redcaimen Senior member

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    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2006
    A dog never calls the police after you beat it.

    A dog never tries to talk your kids into getting "help" if you chain it to the radiator.

    A dog doesnt need to be physically forced to eat dogfood out of a dog dish.

    If your dog suddenly disappears you dont have to waste a lot of time handing out flyers and answering nosy questions from the media.

    If your neighbor looks over the fence and catches you burying your dog in the backyard he will offer his condolences and may even offer to help!
     
  17. Dakota rube

    Dakota rube Senior member

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    A bit better than yesterday, all day vomiting for
    A dog is less critical, far more polite, less demanding, and far more loving.
    Reminds me of a show I saw at a dark, dank club in Waikiki on my 18th birthday!

    "Come here, boy. Come to mama..."[​IMG]
     
  18. Flieger

    Flieger Senior member

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    X-It, the kind of loving I would give you would make a dog vomit.

    o that is easy
     
  19. X-It

    X-It Senior member

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    X-It, the kind of loving I would give you would make a dog vomit.

    Dog poisoning? [​IMG]
     
  20. Milhouse

    Milhouse Senior member

    Messages:
    2,059
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    May 11, 2007
    If your friend brings over his dog, the dogs won't mind you petting your friend's dog and your friend petting your dog. In fact, the dogs probably enjoy this. The dogs may even wrestle playfully without lots of alcohol, suggestions, or begging.
     

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