Do young women prefer casual looks over dress looks?

Discussion in 'Classic Menswear' started by Interface, Jan 29, 2009.

  1. JAlfredPrufrock

    JAlfredPrufrock Active Member

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    This is a subject I feel well qualified to comment on. Seeing as I've spent the last 6 years of my life in college, 4 in a mid-sized public school in the midwest and 2 at a large public school in the south. Over that time I've gone from on of the worst dressed people to one of the best dressed. Now there were some mistakes along the way, I regret to say #2 (or something near it) was one of them. The hardest thing to learn was now to be well dressed without being "dressed-up". That said, being well dressed has opened up many opportunities, if nothing else because if gives women something to compliment you on.

    For me, I find that slim cashmere sweaters work great (I like j-crew's v-neck. if you wait for a sale, you can get them pretty cheap), with a nice dark pair of slim jeans (Gap seems to do this pretty well for a reasonable price) and good shoes are a must (I have a pair of black RL Rivington's and chili AE McClain's that I switch between. These almost always illicit compliments. If you're feeling more casual, I recommend a nice clean white tennis shoe, I wear Converse Jack Purcel). Tie's are optional, depending on mood. If you wear a tie, keep it skinny. Most of mine are between 2-3".

    This general framework has worked for me. I've actually had women stop me in the halls to say "Whoa, you should totally thank whoever taught you how to dress, because they did a great job" or at the bars say "I've seen you around. You're always really well dress. Are you single..."

    I'm a fairly good looking guy, not a stud, but I can hold my own. I whole heartedly believe that the way I dress was open doors for me with women that would otherwise be out of my league.

    Of course, be aware that some women prefer someone more casual. I has an ex girlfriend who hated the way I dressed (but she dated me anyway, so wtf?)

    I should also note that this seems to work for a wide range of ages, from 18-19 to women in their late 20's early 30's. FWIW I'm 23.
     


  2. mkarim

    mkarim Senior member

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    The hardest thing to learn was now to be well dressed without being "dressed-up".

    That's exactly the "middle ground" I am going for, without looking stodgy.

    Do you have any pics to post?
     


  3. lynchpatrickj

    lynchpatrickj Senior member

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    Dress how you want, but be prepared to answer the question "why are you wearing that?" if you're in a suit every day.

    Practical problems include wear and tear on the delicate suit wardrobe, weather-appropriate pieces, and constantly having to go change your clothes in order to do stupid, impractical stuff with your friends that would probably ruin your clothes.

    Upside: you'll get mistaken for Admissions staff or a visiting Mormon occasionally, and probably be known as the Alex P. Keaton of your dorm. If those sound like upsides to you, go for it.

    If not, you can moderate. i wore a lot of old cashmere and odd jackets in college; don't expect to be getting lots of butt just because you're dressed up though. People notice, but clothes don't change who you are. I wore what I wanted and learned a lot about clothes and people at the same time. If I were you and starting from Freshman year at a new place, I'd buy a whole bunch of the more indulgent bits from Polo Rugby and J Crew and not worry about it.
     


  4. binge

    binge Senior member

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    I think we need to determine what kind of college girls he is going after. Sorority Chicks? Goth Chicks? Hipster Chicks?

    Hippie chick?
     


  5. JAlfredPrufrock

    JAlfredPrufrock Active Member

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    That's exactly the "middle ground" I am going for, without looking stodgy.

    Do you have any pics to post?


    I don't have many. I don't have a camera, so all my pictures are from someone else.


    This is the best example I have, and it isn't ideal, but if gives you a sense of what I'm getting at. (I've never posted a photo before, so bear with me)
    [​IMG]
     


  6. BruceWayne

    BruceWayne Well-Known Member

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    I think Doc Holliday is giving good advice in this thread so I'll +1 everything he's said.

    I'd also add to what someone else said and note that option 1 is not a good option for anyone in the specifics. You can do casual that looks a lot better than Gap pleated chinos. I think it's in that area that you'll find most women's preferences for everyday men's wear.


    I don't think gap sells pleated pants of any kind any more. Sorry for nitpicking.
     


  7. mkarim

    mkarim Senior member

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    I don't think gap sells pleated pants of any kind any more. Sorry for nitpicking.

    Good move on their part... [​IMG]
     


  8. SkinnyGoomba

    SkinnyGoomba Senior member

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    If I could distill it all down to one piece of advice, I'd say this much: dress within the norm, but be the best dressed of the norm. Know your context: age, peers, surroundings, norms, etc. Then be the smartest dressed within your context.

    Style isn't limited to suits and ties. Style is about knowing how to dress well for any occasion and in any situation.


    i dont disagree with this, but i dont agree completely. I think stepping a bit out of the norm occasionally works, afterall these people see you almost daily, you can walk the line a bit.

    You have a good reason (not an excuse, because it'll sound try hard) break out a nicely tailored suit.

    I've never been afraid to show them what i'm about, and while it'll detract some women, it attracts the ones i want attracted to me. I like women who like a well dressed man, and breaking out a khaki jacket to pair up with jeans works well sometimes, or a cord jacket, or something that really pushes those limits.
     


  9. SkinnyGoomba

    SkinnyGoomba Senior member

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    I dont understand the fear of being noticed, its not a bad thing.

    you cant be all things to all people, and this idea of a blanket look doesnt work as well as we'd like to think. Afterall you are going to appeal to a certain amount of women, who have a certain taste. I'd rather they know what i'm all about from round 1 then afterwards, the ones that do appreciate it will like you more, though at the cost of off-putting some of the others.
     


  10. Sator

    Sator Senior member

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    I spent a total of 12 years of my life--as an undergraduate, graduate student, post-doctoral research fellow, and assistant professor--at three different American universities between 1959 and 1973, and I sure don't recall a single "suit guy." Is this a more recent phenomenon?

    I don't know if there are any suit guys at the university my stepson attends. I once asked the lad if he would like to start emulating the classic "campus hero" look of yesteryear with, say, a nice tweed jacket, OCBD, decent slacks and shoes. He replied, "People would think I had just come from some sort of theatrical rehearsal."

    I suppose I am my company's equivalent of the suit guy.


    Jan, aren't you a bit old to be participating in this thread? Or are you trying to get tips on how to pick up 25 year old chicks?
     


  11. SkinnyGoomba

    SkinnyGoomba Senior member

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    Not a fear of being noticed. Being noticed is fine. You just don't want to be noticed for being a freakshow. I'd say that wearing a suit around campus sets off a lot of people's freakshow alarms.

    Someone earlier on the thread said it best. If you wear a suit around campus, you run the risk of being mistaken for a member of the admissions committee, a visiting Mormon, or an Alex P. Keaton wannabe. If that's what you're going for, then go for it.

    You make it sound as if I'm arguing in favor of conformity. I'm not. What I'm arguing for is stylishness within acceptable limits, given the situation (i.e., college). I got the impression that the original poster does not want to be known as the campus weirdo. If that is correct, then he shouldn't be wearing a suit to class every day.

    Note that the original poster asked "In general what types do young women like that prefer?" In general, I think it's fair to say that women on campus don't go for the guy sitting in class in a suit. The thread isn't about what a small handful of women go for; it's about what college women "in general" go for.

    Now, we can argue until the cows come home about whether or not he should concern himself with what people think. But that's not what he was asking.


    Wearing a leather suit might make you a freak show, but showing up in a suit once in a while, when you have a good reason, isnt going to make you a freakshow.

    Infact i highly doubt it sets off any alarms.

    I feel that in General you should be showing a bit of your personality through how you dress....A bit. You can take anything to the extreme and really overdo it, but thats not what i'm talking about. I'm talking about, if you have being a dresser in your personality, then wearing a well fitting Cord or Khaki jacket isnt going to put off anyone.
     


  12. joelski

    joelski New Member

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    A&F and hollister are for tools lol
     


  13. Biscione

    Biscione Senior member

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    This thread makes me happy to be studying in Europe. I wear a suit on campus whenever I feel like it. Nobody's repelled, a lot of people appreciate it, and most of them are girls. I should note, however, that I would never turn up in a charcoal or navy worsted... when I do wear a suit on campus I do it youthfully and almost casually. I also understand the allure of details, which girls notice, even if 99% of men don't. Fun socks, pocket squares, boutonnieres, etc. make a huge difference. Anyway, I can't really comment, because there I can imagine that there are American offices where wearing a suit would be considered weird, not to even touch upon universities. One more thing: of course many young women dislike 'dressy' looks, but those tend to be the young women who aren't worth spending much time with.
     


  14. Big A

    Big A Senior member

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    I work in Chapel Hill and Durham, and the girls at Duke and UNC could not be more different. I'd say it depends on the girl, the school, etc. Girls at UNC seem to like a guy in jeans, a polo, and a ball cap just fine. Girls at Hampshire college would probably appreciate a vintage Sex Pistols T-Shirt.

    In other words, don't worry about it - let your freak flag fly.
     


  15. SkinnyGoomba

    SkinnyGoomba Senior member

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    I work in Chapel Hill and Durham, and the girls at Duke and UNC could not be more different. I'd say it depends on the girl, the school, etc. Girls at UNC seem to like a guy in jeans, a polo, and a ball cap just fine. Girls at Hampshire college would probably appreciate a vintage Sex Pistols T-Shirt.

    In other words, don't worry about it - let your freak flag fly.


    +1
     


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