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Everyone seems to be talking around it, and Foof caught it, but you can't make a two-button jacket fall like a one- or a three-button. The first three examples you show as inspirations are all one-button jackets. They button at the natural waist and the quarters open from there giving a balanced silhouette. On your two-button jacket, the bottom quarters can't open until they've cleared the second button. Because the natural waist divides the two buttons, the front on your jacket is more closed than that on the models. If you want to get closer to your inspiration jackets, you are going to have to go to a single or three-button jacket. A two will never look the same. It is this different buttoning stance that makes the inspiration jackets appear to have greater waist suppression. Just nipping the waist more won't fix it.
This is just not true, a two button jacket is often cut so that only the top button is meant to be buttoned, therefore can be cut exactly the same as a one-button jacket. In this particular case it looks like the tailor cut it with the intention of buttoning both buttons, but that's not really normal.
Either your shirt collar is faddishly high or the jacket's collar is a bit low, or both.
the front-back balance issue does not seem egregious here, by any stretch. i'd just have them let out the back a bit and take in the sides (or, since it's already quite tight, not take in the sides quite so much as the back is let out). oh, and shorten the pants.
a)Can an alterationist just unsew the button, place it a little lower, and iron the lapels to it?