Contacting a girl for the first time

Discussion in 'Social Life, Food & Drink, Travel' started by Jr Mouse, Dec 11, 2010.

  1. EMY

    EMY Senior member

    Messages:
    264
    Likes Received:
    2
    Joined:
    Jan 24, 2010
    I've never understood this rule bullshit. If I go through all the effort of flirting with you, complementing you, and asking you for your phone number, why the hell am I going to wait around to get in your pants?

    +1

    if anything, she might think you were just playing w/ her if you wait too long.
     




  2. Sanguis Mortuum

    Sanguis Mortuum Senior member

    Messages:
    5,059
    Likes Received:
    129
    Joined:
    Jul 2, 2006
    Location:
    Cambridge, England
    Recently, I asked a few of my close females friends what their opinion of it was.

    You might want to also consider the possibility that what women say and what women actually do are not necessarily the same thing.
     


  3. Dakota rube

    Dakota rube Senior member

    Messages:
    14,506
    Likes Received:
    193
    Joined:
    Jan 14, 2005
    Location:
    A bit better than yesterday, all day vomiting for
    If these fool-proof "rules" work so well, why are so many guys always having to use them?
     


  4. Jr Mouse

    Jr Mouse Senior member Dubiously Honored

    Messages:
    17,622
    Likes Received:
    2,788
    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Location:
    All of time and space, everything that ever was or
    +1. I hate when men are like, what do women want? As if women acted like a homogeneous block. They're like, people.

    This is true. I know I stated that I follow this "rule" myself, but also dislike it when people try to give general advice on how to interact with women. Each girl is different. What one likes, another may find a turn off.

    You might want to also consider the possibility that what women say and what women actually do are not necessarily the same thing.

    This occurred to me too after the conversations I had with them on the subject.

    If these fool-proof "rules" work so well, why are so many guys always having to use them?

    Maybe guys use them because they work well? Waiting a day or two has always worked well for me so it became a habit. This is really the only "rule" I follow so I can't speak for any of the others. Even then I am reconsidering the need for it.
     


  5. Oski

    Oski Senior member

    Messages:
    724
    Likes Received:
    882
    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2009
    Location:
    Chicago
    if you have to ask you're pathetically Beta. hell, you probably even laugh on the first date.

    [​IMG]
     


  6. willpower

    willpower Senior member

    Messages:
    4,414
    Likes Received:
    40
    Joined:
    May 25, 2009
    Location:
    West Coast
    Those girls are setting you up. It's a trap. Chicks have no idea what they want, never have.
     


  7. word

    word Senior member

    Messages:
    755
    Likes Received:
    1
    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2009
    Location:
    North Carolina
    As far as I'm concerned calling soon is a move done out of interest, not desperation. Besides if you got their number in the first place you probably didn't come off as desperate anyways. Otherwise you never would have gotten it.

    Usually what I do is text the following morning asking what a good time would be to call that day and make it happen. If it was early in the day when I got the number and I'm not busy I'll try to talk that evening. Adding them on facebook helps too because I have trouble remembering names and faces for #s I get.
     


  8. landshark

    landshark Senior member

    Messages:
    1,716
    Likes Received:
    51
    Joined:
    Apr 22, 2010
    I usually wait a few days. If I met them on the weekend, I won't call until the middle of the following week. I used to not have a rule really and call the next day or the same weekend and it never really worked out. It comes across as desperate and as if you have nothing to do. Obviously, if a girl says, "call me tomorrow" it would be okay and I have had that happen. Otherwise, make them wait. They shouldn't be your priority anyways.
     


  9. Jr Mouse

    Jr Mouse Senior member Dubiously Honored

    Messages:
    17,622
    Likes Received:
    2,788
    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Location:
    All of time and space, everything that ever was or
    As far as I'm concerned calling soon is a move done out of interest, not desperation. Besides if you got their number in the first place you probably didn't come off as desperate anyways. Otherwise you never would have gotten it.

    Usually what I do is text the following morning asking what a good time would be to call that day and make it happen. If it was early in the day when I got the number and I'm not busy I'll try to talk that evening. Adding them on facebook helps too because I have trouble remembering names and faces for #s I get.


    I usually don't even bother with a phone call. Text them to say hi and when I hear back I ask them if they want to do lunch or something.

    I never do the FB request before we have gone out a few times. That just seems like a bad idea to me.
     


  10. ConcernedParent

    ConcernedParent Senior member

    Messages:
    4,234
    Likes Received:
    30
    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2009
    Location:
    West Coast is back for all you suckas
    So you're saying dictures also?

    It was kind of the subtle, implied joke.
     


  11. sartorialism

    sartorialism Senior member

    Messages:
    1,080
    Likes Received:
    12
    Joined:
    Jun 23, 2008
    Location:
    New York
    +1. I hate when men are like, what do women want? As if women acted like a homogeneous block. They're like, people.

    [​IMG] Should I put my neck out on this one?

    if you have to ask you're pathetically Beta. hell, you probably even laugh on the first date.


    Ahh, re-read, pause and think.
     


  12. word

    word Senior member

    Messages:
    755
    Likes Received:
    1
    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2009
    Location:
    North Carolina
    I usually don't even bother with a phone call. Text them to say hi and when I hear back I ask them if they want to do lunch or something.

    I never do the FB request before we have gone out a few times. That just seems like a bad idea to me.


    Hm, I've not had trouble with it. But most of the women I meet are through friends when we're hanging out. You're right though, probably not a great idea for a stranger. But I don't really ask out strangers unless they make a damn good impression on me right away, which is never.
     


  13. Jr Mouse

    Jr Mouse Senior member Dubiously Honored

    Messages:
    17,622
    Likes Received:
    2,788
    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2009
    Location:
    All of time and space, everything that ever was or
    Hm, I've not had trouble with it. But most of the women I meet are through friends when we're hanging out. You're right though, probably not a great idea for a stranger. But I don't really ask out strangers unless they make a damn good impression on me right away, which is never.

    Yeah if it's a friend of a friend then it's not a big deal. I just find there is too much crap on my FB profile to be sharing with someone I just met. Would rather leave a little mystery to myself and keep a little to her too.
     


  14. kwilkinson

    kwilkinson Having a Ball

    Messages:
    33,652
    Likes Received:
    857
    Joined:
    Nov 21, 2007
    Location:
    Chicago
    I usually don't even bother with a phone call. Text them to say hi and when I hear back I ask them if they want to do lunch or something.

    I never do the FB request before we have gone out a few times. That just seems like a bad idea to me.


    You text women to ask them out on your first date?

    Srsly? I thought you were an adult. Like 30 years old. That's like.... teenager shit.
     


Share This Page

Styleforum is proudly sponsored by