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“Black tie optional” is an utterly ridiculous phrase.
Think about how odd it would look for just a few people to show up in tuxedos and and the rest wearing whatever.
Skip the tux. Wear a dark suit.
in my world this means everyone wears the ****** suit they have in the closet and two people show up dressed nicely and then look weird because they stand out so much.Can not decide whether to wear a tux to BLK Tie optional wedding. Santa Fe in late September. Wedding is at 4 p.m.
Is Black Tie Optional just code for "please wear a tie and dark colored suit"?
Thanks
Can not decide whether to wear a tux to BLK Tie optional wedding. Santa Fe in late September. Wedding is at 4 p.m.
Is Black Tie Optional just code for "please wear a tie and dark colored suit"?
Thanks
Wedding is at 4pm. My understanding is that tux's are a no-go before 6pm (hence why I'm wearing a suit when I get married at 4:30 and a tux for my reception later this year.) Wouldn't going in a tux to a 4pm wedding be incorrect (or, perhaps, incorrect but overlooked since it's explicitly "optional"?)
Black Tie Optional just means they didn't have the stones to go Black Tie or even Black Tie Preferred.
I always translate Black Tie Optional as "I really wish people would wear black tie, but I'm afraid of imposing my will on other people or being seen as too pretentious."
or understanding that there may be some friends or family that are not as well off and attending the wedding, paying for travel or whatever, and adding a tuxedo rental to the cost, might cause them to be apprehensive or uncomfortable about attending. And ultimately a wedding is supposed to be a celebration with friends and family, so no need to make them uncomfortable.
Black Tie Preferred allows for all those options while still strongly letting people know that if they can do BT the couple wants that to be what is worn.
BTO always leads to majority not in black tie.
not disagreeing.
but the word “preferred” could still lead to an uncomfortable feeling for those who are going against the bride’s “preference”
A wedding is about the guests being a part of the occasion, families being together that might not see each other all that often, etc.. for some, it’s better to make everyone that is invited feel welcome.
so I view black tie optional as the couple letting the guests know that they would like to see some tuxedos. So play the part of you can.