- Apr 26, 2008
- Reaction score
tl; dr#1 The Ambrosi Incident –– I was going to detail the whole fiasco, but I will let sleeping dogs lie. However, I feel compelled speak to your role in helping me save face with my Japanese partners with whom I had invested a large amount of borrowed money in a speculative real estate venture. (I referred my partners to Ambrosi, and when you make such a referral in Japan, you vouchsafe for that person's actions as your own). When my partners trousers didn't arrive on schedule, and as time and time went on, I became suspicious. I did a google search, something along the lines 'Ambrosi pants scam.' A thread in which you delineated the business practices of Ambrosi surfaced. This was the day in which I discovered this forum, a discovery which has given me endless pleasures. But on that day I was furious. I called up Ambrosi and told him the jig was up: my partners need their pants. I told him I read the Sytleforum thread, and soon all of Italy will find out about him. I said I had tracked him down and I know he's partying it up on Jeju Island. He said MaFooFan was a buffoon: he couldn't be trusted. I said, on the contrary, I have gone through his posts, and he has taught me, an Italian, things I didn't know about Italian tailoring. He said that wasn't surprising because I was a Northerner. I had it at this point. I told him to go back to Naples and get my pants. I told him in a way that roughly translates to: 'go immediately back to Naples and be with the prostitutes, but don't use your hands, which God has blessed, for immoral purposes.' Needless to say, I not only got the back ordered pants, but additional pants for my partners free of charge. If I didn't find MaFooFan's thread, I would never have confronted Ambrosi before he completely went to the dogs. I would have been financially ruined on account of all the other things that went wrong with my real estate venture: the pants would have been the straw that broke the camel's back and my partners would have left me holding the bag. Instead, we all pulled through together and prospered (Never again with the Japanese real estate: it is the worst).
#2 The Hermes Incident –– I walked into a Hermes' retail location to look at women's hand bags and received rather brusque treatment. I was upset because I had absolutely no intention of buying anything. (General Employer Rule #3: unless a maker is an artist (let's say artistsan from now on), never pay more than 80% off MSRP, but ideally have somebody take a big loss when they are in a pickle). I present myself though as a man of the world for whom money is no object. Everyone always believes this about me. But I felt like this young retail employee read into my soul: that she somehow traced the long line of aristocratic money grubbers in my features. It's like she knew that I go to a number of retail shops with the purpose of educating myself so that I may properly strike when the iron is hot. It's like she bore witness to the looks of disappointment of the faces of retail clerks across the United States when I invariably say the words, "I'll think about it." I swear dear members, the look she gave me was one of an avenging angel, like all my sins were accounted for. Needless to say, afterwards, this shattered my sense of self, and I fell into a deep depression. I was seriously contemplating whether or not I should just end it all. But then I had a thought: 'what if they treat everyone like that at Hermes?' I performed a google search, and like a miracle sent from heaven, there was MaFooFan's green wallet thread. Just like MaFooFan educated me about the business practices of Ambrosi, he likewise enlightened me about Hermes, which of course makes perfect sense in a grand sociological context: One wants to run off with your money, and another wants to spit on it. This is life, I told myself. It is nothing I didn't know already. But yet, somehow, 'I was brought to the school-house' as they say where I'm from.