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Australian Members

Discussion in 'Classic Menswear' started by earthdragon, Nov 18, 2008.

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  1. fxh

    fxh Senior member

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    ernesto - I've managed to combine my 3 loves, drink, sex and word play.

    I run an Erotic Pun Bar.
    I hire a barman.
    We have the usual run of drinks and cocktails especially erotic named ones. Long Slow Screw - and other obvious names

    Anyway. One night this tall slinky blonde extremely attractive lady walks in.

    Sashays up to the bar and says to my barman.

    "Give me Double Entendre please."

    So

    He jumped over the counter - and - gave her one.
     
  2. Prince of Paisley

    Prince of Paisley Senior member

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  3. LonerMatt

    LonerMatt Senior member

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    Hey FHX, where in Otways? Laver's Hill? Johanna?
     
  4. fxh

    fxh Senior member

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    nah nah - further up toward The Bay/ Forest etc. Anyway I could tell you but then I'd have to throw you over cliff into the Blowhole at the 12 11 10 9 8 7 6 5 Apostles. You could spend your weekends looking for the Mahogany Ship. Or go and see my school mates the Dead Livers - when they reform. Yet again

    One of my mates (his band opened for the Stones at Kooyong in '72) used to run The Boggy Creek pub @ Curdie Vale - nothing else there - possibly still does - just outside of W'bool - nice for a visit and quiet afternoon on the slops in a bucolic atmosphere.
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2014
  5. The Ernesto

    The Ernesto Senior member

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    :laugh:

    Nice set up. I also like the short version...A woman walks into a bar and asks for a double entendre, so the barman gave her one
     
  6. fxh

    fxh Senior member

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    I think aesthetically and in keeping with the genre the short version is actually the better one - its the one I use anyway.

    The shorter one is the one I usually use.

    So I've noticed -as the actress said to the bishop.
     
  7. The Ernesto

    The Ernesto Senior member

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    What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals? Philippe Philoppe
     
    1 person likes this.
  8. ovlov

    ovlov Senior member

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    Keep em coming. I could use a laugh.
    Bar jokes are always good.

    A grasshopper walks into a bar and orders a drink.
    The bartender says "hey, you know we've got a cocktail named after you".
    The grasshopper looks up surprised. "What? Kevin?!"
     
    1 person likes this.
  9. The Ernesto

    The Ernesto Senior member

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    The barman says: “We don’t serve faster-than-light particles here.” A tachyon enters a bar.


    A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says: “Five beers, please.”
     
  10. Foxhound

    Foxhound Senior member

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    Luxire will make you a jacket of your design in Epic Fabric for $500 USD inclusive of shipping, fully MTM. Epic is one of the best tech fabrics around, and will keep you very dry. I will be receiving a mac in a couple of weeks.
     
  11. CoffeeDudeGuy

    CoffeeDudeGuy Senior member

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    .....
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2014
  12. CoffeeDudeGuy

    CoffeeDudeGuy Senior member

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    Oak Room in Ashburton have some good ones at the moment. Beans by Monk Bodhi Dharma, but Ken who runs the joint provides excellent service most of all (His sons run Workshop Brothers in Glen Huntly, pretty good too). Beans from Omar and the Marvellous Coffee Bird down at Gardenvale/Brighton are good as well. These are some of the better, less well-known ones besides Auction Rooms, Proud Mary, Seven Seeds and the like...

    Used coffee grinds and coconut oil. No, really.

    Food is one of the biggest factors though, especially cutting out milk and sugars. But since we are mostly covered in classic/work/street wear, focusing on the face only should be enough [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2014
  13. ovlov

    ovlov Senior member

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    Two penguins toddling along when one suddenly stops, turns to his friend, looks him up and down closely and says " You know what mate? You know you look a lot like you're wearing a tuxedo".

    The other penguin smiles back at him slyly and says

    "Maybe I am..."
     
  14. JohnsNotHere

    JohnsNotHere Senior member

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    I love bar jokes:

    Man walks into a bar with a piece of Tarmac under his arm, says to bar man, "one for me and one for the road"

    Jumper leads walk into a bar, bar man says, "you can stay but don't start anything"

    Two sandwiches walk into a bar, bar man says, "sorry, we don't serve food in here"

    Horse walks into a bar, bar man says, "why the long face?"

    And my favorite non bar joke ... Vegetarian, old Indian word for "bad hunter"
     
    1 person likes this.
  15. Foxhound

    Foxhound Senior member

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    How do you know if someone is a Vegan?

    Oh don't worry, they'll tell you.
     
    2 people like this.
  16. ovlov

    ovlov Senior member

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  17. LonerMatt

    LonerMatt Senior member

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    That pub is still there and it's still scenic as fuck.
     
  18. iSurg

    iSurg Senior member

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    CoffeeDudeGuy: Thanks for the suggestions! Will try those mentioned beans. I saw a whole bunch of youtube clips for BulletProof coffee and it kinda scares me that you have to drink a shiteload of butter... Probably not a good thing for someone with a sedentary lifestyle like mine...
     
  19. lennier

    lennier Senior member

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    When I worked for Mt Buller that was the standard ski instructor joke. And if you were an instructor it was an examiner joke. Very adaptable :)
     
  20. fxh

    fxh Senior member

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    Satre was visiting USA - he walks into a cafe and orders a coffee with no cream.
    The waitress says, “Sorry, we’re out of cream. How about coffee with no milk?

    Afterwards him and Descartes walk into a bar.

    A, well read, customer recognises them and asks if he can buy them a beer.

    Descartes replies, “I think not.”. And they both disappear.
     
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2014
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