Attending a "black tie prefered" wedding in two weeks

[sac4th]

My wife and I are attending our couple-friends' "black tie prefered" wedding on September 7th and I need help on what to wear.

I've done some research on the 'net but haven't found a viable solution to my specific conundrum.

I would wear a tux if I had one. But since I don't, it's on to plan B.

From all the sources I read, they say that one should wear a dark suit in lieu of a tux at "black tie prefered/optional" event.

But there in lies the problem: I don't have a "dark" suit. I bought a notched lapel, two button, double vented mid gray one last year for my own (very small and very "cost effective") wedding held in my godparents' back yard last year. It surprising fit very well and looked great. Surprising because it was a $99 poly/rayon Michael Kors and because I never have any luck with OTR suits. I wear a 38S jacket and they usually come with size 30 or 31 pants. I have a 28" waist but had put on a little weight so the pants fit. I've gotten back into working out regularly since then and have returned to a 28" waist so, thus, the pants no longer fit.

Even though a don't own a tux, I bandied about the idea of still wearing a bow tie (since I already own one). But for that, I thought it best to purchase a charcoal 3 piece. I was hoping to have the money to purchase one but my wife and I are on a tight budget these days. We cannot even afford the Alfani suit separate rig I saw at Macy's at the moment.

So as it stands, I have to work with what I've already got:

-that mid gray two button (that needs taking in on the pants)

-a slim fit white french cuffed Ben Sherman button down

-a slim fit white french cuffed tuxedo-style Bowie by Keanan Duffty button down

(I prefer french cuffs as opposed to barrel cuffs)

-a slim fit black Apt. 9 barrel cuffed button down

-a black notched lapel waistcoat with faint navy blue "embroidered" pinstripes

suggestions and advice would be greatly appreciated

 

[Mute]

Forget the fancy shirt and bow tie. Go with a plain white shirt and a darker tie. Keep it simple.

 

[Ianiceman]

This.

A tux is a good outfit.

A solid suit with white shirt and dark tie is a good outfit.

A pretendy tux patched together with bits and pieces looks ****.

 

[msulinski]

If that is actual picture of the suit, then I think the color is dark enough.

I agree with the others that you should skip the vest and the tuxedo shirt.

 

[Wallcloud]

No shame in wearing a dark suit to a black tie optional event. Do like Bond, white shirt, crunchy silk knit black tie. You will look better than a lot of the guys wearing notch lapel tuxes.

 

[Veremund]

Wear the suit you have with a black necktie. Black satin, or black knit. No vest, no new suit. White pocket square too.

 

[VinnyMac]

First, contact your friends to verify that their idea of "black tie" is what you have in mind. Some people use the words "formal" and "black tie" when they only mean "wear a suit."

Second, go from there.

EDIT:

Third, don't wear that vest. The double-lapel 3-piece is one of the worst-looking suits out there, but I see it quite a bit. I guess guys think that it makes them look more fancy. It makes them look like idiots...just my opinion though.

 

[GBR]

Just go with what you wore at your own wedding. Perfectly good enough.

 

[sac4th]

Thank you all so much for your advice

 

[Veremund]

So, what are you going to do? Have you got a plain black satin tie?

 

[msulinski]

Wear the suit you have with a black necktie. Black satin, or black knit. No best, no new suit. White
pocket square too.

Satin and knit ties seem to me to be on the opposite end of the formality spectrum, at least as far as ties go. What about a wedding tie of some sort?

 

[sac4th]

I'm going with the suit and yes i own a black satin tie

Here's a quick pic I took of my ensemble

 

[sac4th]

Another question:

Is it ok that my shirt has some texture to it (See photo) instead of just being a plain weave?

I anticipate doffing my jacket at the reception later in the evening to go dancing. The texture might add a bit of interest, no?

 

[AdamP77]

What kind of pattern is that? Really nice subtle touches that you wouldn't notice unless you're looking up close

Another question:

Is it ok that my shirt has some texture to it (See photo) instead of just being a plain weave?

I anticipate doffing my jacket at the reception later in the evening to go dancing. The texture might add a bit of interest, no?

 

[msulinski]



Another question:

Is it ok that my shirt has some texture to it (See photo) instead of just being a plain weave?

I anticipate doffing my jacket at the reception later in the evening to go dancing. The texture might add a bit of interest, no?

Generally, for a more formal evening outfit, such as the one you are planning on wearing, you are going for sleeker and simpler rather than incorporating subtle textures. That shirt is probably still fine though.