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from the UK, I can't see them as an even remotely controversial choice.
I don't have a problem with them at all. I wear them from time to time when I want something a little different.
I was "raised" (in the style world) to think of silk knots as appropriate only for black-tie. Is that wrong?
I would say it's wrong. They are less formal. For black tie you want your most formal set.
I have a few. Charvet makes very nice ones. I do not presently own any French cuff shirts, however!
I think for most people who are against silk knots, their main reason is that they don't cost much to buy. Because they are not expensive, they must be nasty.