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after being out of the house for years, would you move back to save money? ;p

GQgeek

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My lease is nearly up and I'm considering it for a period of one year. My father's place is not large and my brother is there also. My room would be tiny and I'd have to put most of my stuff in storage. I've lived on my own since I was 18. My current apartment is huge for a single guy and the only reason I'm considering it is the cost of graduate schools, as it would enable me to save an extra 14k this year. It would be nice if I could put away at least half the total cost of an mba. Alternatively, it would help make a sizeable dent in a downpayment on a condo if i decided to continue working and do an mba part-time in toronto a couple more years down the road.

I get along well with my father, but living in my father's condo won't exactly do wonders for my sex life.
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Then again, with school and work combined I'm doing a consistent 80 hrs/wk throughout the year, so it's not like i'm getting any right now.
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The pain might be worth it if it meant i wouldn't have to rent for more than a year after moving to wherever I move.
 

tonylumpkin

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One thing you don't mention in your post is how your father and brother would be affected by this move. Will you be welcome? And, even if you are, would crowding a third person into a small apartment adversely affect the good relationship you have with your family? Your brother, unless he is a minor and still entitled to be dependent on your father, has less say in the matter, but your Dad may have become accustomed to his current arrangements and, although he might never tell you this, he might be concerned that his sex life will suffer, his expenses will increase, his privacy will be encroached upon.

I don't pretend to know anything about your personal life and none of the personal thoughts I speculated might be going through your father's head may actually be there, but if you haven't done this already, sit down and try to think it through from the opposite perspective before you decide this is what you want to do.
 

GQgeek

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Originally Posted by tonylumpkin
One thing you don't mention in your post is how your father and brother would be affected by this move. Will you be welcome? And, even if you are, would crowding a third person into a small apartment adversely affect the good relationship you have with your family? Your brother, unless he is a minor and still entitled to be dependent on your father, has less say in the matter, but your Dad may have become accustomed to his current arrangements and, although he might never tell you this, he might be concerned that his sex life will suffer, his expenses will increase, his privacy will be encroached upon.

I don't pretend to know anything about your personal life and none of the personal thoughts I speculated might be going through your father's head may actually be there, but if you haven't done this already, sit down and try to think it through from the opposite perspective before you decide this is what you want to do.


Good points. I'd certainly pay for my own food and share of the expenses. The savings I calculated were just on rent. He mentionned that i could move in a couple of years ago if i wanted to, but at the time i decided against it because the whole reason i was moving from my then current apartment was to have more space. I really like the large amount of space I have now and 2 years ago I didn't even consider his offer. It would be a huge change from the way i've been living. It's not even a full year. It would be from july to april, after which i'd be out of there. Still, I'm completely undecided as to whether it's something I even want to do. I really like coming home to my current place.
 

Ludeykrus

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I did.

My parents have an old yet decent apartment below their house (it's built on a hill). I was unable to keep working full time to earn enough to live on while also going full-time to school. I pay for everything on my own, get a good deal on living in the apartment, and don't have to live on ramen noodles. I had a good girlfriend going into it, though, so that aspect wasn't an issue.
 

lost in va

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I got kicked out when I was young and made some REALLY stupid finical decisions which put me into about $18k worth of credit card debt. I stayed out on my own for a few more years (debt moving down VERY slowly before deciding for a few reasons that I should move home for about a year.

I've been here for about 7 months now and I don't have a single thing to complain about. Before moving back me and my dad had a VERY bad relationship, now that I'm back me and my dad have NEVER been closer. I'm also $3k short of being completely out of debt (CC, car, everything). The debt is what I'm waiting to clear before moving back out for good.
 

Dewey

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I think the money is secondary here.

It might be good for your father and brother to have you around, if you are a good son and a good brother. If your brother is younger, you would have a chance to set an example for him. He may not remember you so well at this point. He might not appreciate your example or the extra supervision, but he will note it anyway, and your opinion of doing this or doing that will get back into his head for perhaps a long time.

If you can be a good team player - i.e., family member, a person who does what he should do, in this case, as a son and a brother - I think this might be too good an opportunity to pass up. You guys will not be spending much time together in 20 years, for sure.

On the other hand, if you are more of an independent person than a family person, then you should probably keep living the lone wolf life and not impose on your pop and bro.
 

JohnnyLaw

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Originally Posted by Dewey
I think the money is secondary here.
Originally Posted by GQgeek
My current apartment is huge for a single guy and the only reason I'm considering it is the cost of graduate schools, as it would enable me to save an extra 14k this year.
Sounds like the money is the main concern here. Just get a cheaper apartment. You are in Montreal, right? You're paying almost 1200$ a month on rent. If you're willing to downgrade, which you obviously are because you're considering moving into a tiny room at your dad's, just get a smaller place. You could cut your rent to 700-800$ and still get a decent place in a good location if you look around a bit. That's 5 or 6 grand in your pockets right there.
 

GQgeek

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Originally Posted by JohnnyLaw
Sounds like the money is the main concern here. Just get a cheaper apartment. You are in Montreal, right? You're paying almost 1200$ a month on rent. If you're willing to downgrade, which you obviously are because you're considering moving into a tiny room at your dad's, just get a smaller place. You could cut your rent to 700-800$ and still get a decent place in a good location if you look around a bit. That's 5 or 6 grand in your pockets right there.

It'll sound funny, but the downgrade and hassle of a move and storage isn't worth it to me for 5-6k. This is an all or nothing affair.
laugh.gif
 

Pilot

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assuming your dad or bro wouldn't mind and welcome you back in, i would do it in a heart beat. i'm down at school by myself living in an apartmetn with s few guys not making any money because i go to shool full time and only work weekends because there are no jobs in the small town i go to school at. but my older brother lives at home works 40hrs a week and goes to night school. makes a decent amount of money and has no expenses. i really envy him
 

gmku

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I would do almost anything to save money. Even this, yes.
 

JoeWoah

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What about your personal life and independence? How much is it worth?

That's one reason why I could never, ever consider moving back home. I don't care if I lived a mile away, I wouldn't move back into my father's home.

Women consider guys, even young guys, that live with their parents losers. Doesn't matter how big the house is or if you have a big pool house. I wouldn't even be on a short list of potential suitors for my gf if I lived at home. It's an automatic disqualification for any young professional woman.

Even though you're an adult, you'll still get **** about staying out late. When I go home and visit, I'm still asked what time I'll be back and where I'm going. Some things die hard I guess. I'd rather avoid all that and live my life the way I want to.

Having women over, sleeping in your room. When I visit, I can't have ladies sleep in my room. Even if I could, they'd feel pretty uncomfortable and creeped out.

How about having friends over? It's not like you can throw an impromptu party having friends over at 3am or whatever else you want to do.

I don't pretend to know your family, but I can't imagine them allowing you to live as if you were on your own and letting you do as you please.

Unless you're living in NYC, 14K a year in rent is a bit too much. When you compare wants and need, I bet you'll find quite a few things about your place now that is unnecessary. Do you really need a place that big, that that neighborhood and with those amenities? I'd say moving to a cheaper place, or to a place with roommates, would be worth the move to save some cash and keep your independence and lifestyle.
 

Homme

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Originally Posted by GQgeek
I get along well with my father, but living in my father's condo won't exactly do wonders for my sex life.


Unless he stands over you and watches you type... i don't think you have anything to worry about

Just kidding.

I wouldn't do it if your father is 'overbearing'. Then again, if you're working 80 hour weeks, i don't think it matters where you sleep... it's not like you'll have any time to do anything else.
 

millionaire75

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I did it myself after living in NYC for years in my early 20's....moved home for a couple of years, paid down all my debt and built a very nice size savings....if your parents are cool with it, I would take them up on it. Obviously, it would affect your freedom and your social life but the financial gains make up for it. You have your whole life ahead of you to have fun.
 

Thomas

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I did this after graduation, largely because I took a traveling job and expected to be away from home maybe 3-4 weeks a month. Sometimes I arrived home, did laundry, slept, and then went back to the airport. It was ok as far as saving money goes, hell on the social life but I spent so little time there it wasn't the end of the world.

I paid rent, cooked my own meals, did my own laundry, helped my brother with his schoolwork, helped around the house, that sort of thing. It was nice to have the extra $$$, and at that time the family dynamic allowed for it.
 

Enzo

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I plan on living with my Mom for a couple years after I graduate. I'm studying Pharmacy and if the economic climate stays the same I'll get a very well paying job quickly. Maybe a year or two at the most until i can rent/buy myself a good place to live, unfortunately, around here the housing market is expensive as hell.
 

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