Advice sought over wedding dress: Awkward morning or lounge suit

[Pseudosyco]

Afternoon everyone

I am attending a wedding next month, and am keen to get a third opinion on a sartorial matter! The groom will be wearing a morning coat for the occasion, his two twin brothers also, and his third brother (best man) dress blues. Although I will not be the best man, I will be performing a few duties and am probably to be considered as "in" the wedding. I own a morning suit from my own wedding, and it has been suggested I wear it if I want. The problem is I would rather wear something inconspicuous (I have a nice bespoke three piece in mind), and as I previously mentioned my morning rig is of the light grey suit variety, and therefore not totally correct for my role. The groom has told me to wear what I would like (I am not sure of the bride's opinion, if she has one).

Will I be underdressed if I don't go with my morning suit, or should I just wear a lounge suit like the majority of the male guests? I was hoping simply to acquiesce to the wishes of the bride and groom, but they have been very nice and told me to wear what I feel comfortable in.

Any opinion/advice would be greatly appreciated

 

[Macallan]

I would say it depends on what the duties are:

If they are not apparent, then the three-peice suit

If they are apparent, then the morning suit - the groom is in the more formal version of morning wear, brothers in formal military wear, whereas you will be wearing a less formal version of morning wear. This will make all five of you stand out from others, whereas in a suit you would seem more like a guest rather then part of the wedding.

 

[Pseudosyco]

Originally Posted by Macallan

I would say it depends on what the duties are:

If they are not apparent, then the three-peice suit

If they are apparent, then the morning suit - the groom is in the more formal version of morning wear, brothers in formal military wear, whereas you will be wearing a less formal version of morning wear. This will make all five of you stand out from others, whereas in a suit you would seem more like a guest rather then part of the wedding.

As far as I know the only duty I will have, above that of any other guest, will be the signing of the register.

 

[GBR]

If you will be discharging 'duties' in connection with the guests ie usher or as you have now added signing the register then you should wear morning dress particularly as you are fortunate to own it already. Signing the Register is one of the key elements of the ceremony and photographs will surely be taken.

It is not your day but the that of the couple and so to fit it is appropriate to forget your own preference.

 

[Pseudosyco]

Originally Posted by GBR

If you will be discharging 'duties' in connection with the guests ie usher then you should wear morning dress particularly as you are fortunate to own it already.

It is not your day but the that of the couple and so to fit it is appropriate and forget your own preference.

Do you think the fact that I will be wearing a grey, 'groom's' morning suit has any bearing on it?

I am sure no one would notice much less comment, but I dread someone interpreting it as an attempt to 'out-do' the groom.

 

[rmanoj]

This is why a morning suit probably isn't a wise purchase unless you already own normal black morning dress. I don't think it would be a massive problem though - as you say, traditionally only the groom (and the father of the bride?) would have worn grey, but does anyone really know or observe this distinction these days? I've seen a picture of Prince Charles wearing his morning suit to a wedding that wasn't his.

 

[GBR]

Originally Posted by Pseudosyco

Do you think the fact that I will be wearing a grey, 'groom's' morning suit has any bearing on it?

I am sure no one would notice much less comment, but I dread someone interpreting it as an attempt to 'out-do' the groom.

Grey can be worn by any member of the wedding party not merely the groom. There is no connection between the two whatever.

 

[TheEdwardian]

Correctness or grey morning suit is endless debated without much of a definitive answer here, which make me suspect that if there is one, barely matters anymore.

Depends on the friends. Most of my close knit group got married or went to enough of each others' weddings in our mid/late 20s, that we all got morning clothes. I don't feel mine is out of place at any 'traditional' (i.e. standard CofE/painfully middle class register office) UK wedding unless invite specifies something else, and have worn it happily at wedding where I have nothing to do with the groomsmen. It puts me in the minority of the young dandies and aged relatives, but I have never felt innapropriate. Depends on your friends and your own cojones, though, I imagine.

Since they've offered you the chance to where what you like, follow your instinct. It's likely to be better than any advice teh interwebs can offer you.

 

[rmanoj]

I got the example of Prince Charles from this thread. Of course, the propriety of his wearing it is still questionable because he actually does own proper morning dress, but that doesn't apply in your case, so just wear it and don't worry.

 

[Alex C]

If you have access to her, ask the bride. It doesn't matter what everybody else things, and you're choice is between two classic options that you'd be happy with. If you can go out of your way to make her happy, you'll win.

 

[in stitches]

without quoting everyone above i would say it seems the morning suit is the way to go

to be honest though i only opened the thread because i thought it was about a dude wearing a wedding dress and the morning after

 

[LaoHu]

Originally Posted by TheEdwardian

Since they've offered you the chance to where what you like, follow your instinct. It's likely to be better than any advice teh interwebs can offer you.

+1

 

[Pseudosyco]

Thanks to everyone - I think I will go with the morning suit afterall (I don't get to wear it all that often).