1. Welcome to the new Styleforum!

    We hope you’re as excited as we are to hang out in the new place. There are more new features that we’ll announce in the near future, but for now we hope you’ll enjoy the new site.

    We are currently fine-tuning the forum for your browsing pleasure, so bear with any lingering dust as we work to make Styleforum even more awesome than it was.

    Oh, and don’t forget to head over to the Styleforum Journal, because we’re giving away two pairs of Carmina shoes to celebrate our move!

    Please address any questions about using the new forum to support@styleforum.net

    Cheers,

    The Styleforum Team

    Dismiss Notice

When does a gentleman fight back?

Discussion in 'Health & Body' started by Lear, Apr 17, 2009.

  1. slider07

    slider07 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    45
    Joined:
    Mar 1, 2009
    Good point - the jaw will drop 'em like a rock.
     
  2. Crane's

    Crane's Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    6,237
    Joined:
    Jun 4, 2008
    Location:
    Chasing tornadoes across the plains.
    This thread is kinda weird. I rarely have these kinds of problems (maybe I need to get out more?). I wonder if it's what kind of vibes that one puts out. Other people can "smell" if you're a pushover, doormat, scared, nervous, etc. and they can pick you out in a crowd and they'll fuck with you. But people can also tell if you're not going to mess around and you're assertive. I've noticed that if the latter's the case they'll leave you alone.

    What you referring to here is called the predator prey response. A predator can sense and will act on any perceived signal of weakness with an attack. Likewise they can also sense when their prey will hold it's ground and fight back if it has to. Most predators will pass on this kind of prey and will go hunting somewhere else.

    It's all about attitude and composure most of the time.

    There are other situations where you'll need some serious skill sets in order to survive but fortunately those encounters are rare.
     
  3. Nexus6

    Nexus6 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    741
    Joined:
    Oct 14, 2008
    Location:
    Toronto, Ontario, Canada
    Greetings Lear & gentlemen. Lear, the Al Pacino movie is 'Carlito's Way'. I salute you and all who have the presence of mind & strength of character to walk away. You are correct in saying the evil-doers can sense you. When good energy and bad energy come into contact, one sees the other 100% I am a Christian, and have been persecuted most of my life so far. I have been laughed at, mocked, punched, beaten with fists, boots, sticks, and almost every other thing a person can use as a weapon. I have been spit on, falsely accused, treated like **** all my life. And by the grace of God, I am still standing. The only times I ever used a fist, were in a few occassions where the honour of a woman was at stake. I don't care if I come across as 17th century or not. Chivalry is not dead..not yet [​IMG] I start every day this way, to set my mind for the day. When I wake, I pray; 'I am yours almighty God. Do with me as you wish' From that point to the rest of the day, I will try to use every skill I have to avoid confrontations. Avoid eye contact with creepy people. eyes are magnets. Well...sometimes there's no avoiding it, correct? If & when confrontation strikes, I have a few modest but powerful tools in combat... Example: A physical confrontation whereby I am being threatened with physical violence, I'll say, 'OK Pal...you try any rough stuff...and I am going to BLEED all over you!' and give a wink. Using comedy, it gives the moron a way out of his stupidity without him 'losing face' It has worked 100% You know the 2 old 'rules of arguing with idiots' [​IMG] Rule 1) Never argue with an idiot, because he (she) will only drag you down to his level, and then beat you with experience. Rule 2) Never argue with an idiot, because anyone coming late to the conversation, will not be able to determine which of you is the idiot. [​IMG] Instead, say 'Thank You' aloud, for all to see & hear...that any and all witnesses will see who is the trouble-maker, and who is the gentlemen. Then get the heck away from the evil-doer. Seems like you are a victim of afore-mentioned Rule 2. If you won't mind, I share this with you.... Hostility from the World (the words of Jesus) "If the world hates you, remember that the world hated me first. If you belonged to the world, then the world would love you like it loves its own people. But I have chosen you out of the world. So you don't belong to the world. That is why the world hates you. Remember the lesson I told you: A servant is not greater than his master. If people did wrong to me, then they will do wrong to you too. And if people obeyed my teaching, then they will obey yours too. - John 15:18-20 and these: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/...203&version=9; http://www.prayerguide.org.uk/stfrancis.htm God bless all of you who persevere in the face of bad behaviour. It will be by our example, that lost souls are encouraged to become gentlemen. It is our torch to hold high; our time to prepare those who follow in our place. Those who are afflicted need only to be shown the light. It costs us nothing to return hatred with compassion. Peace gentlemen. [​IMG]
     
  4. West24

    West24 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,960
    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2007
    i try my hardest never to get into fights. and it usually works, but just recently i got into two fights in 1 week. both times i was with friends from boxing, and none of us look like boxers or tough guys etc. we try hard to avoid it but people take that as being weak and continue to bother you. i know they genuinely probably dont want to fight but rather pick on you and make themselves feel better in the end by bullying people.
     
  5. Tck13

    Tck13 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,749
    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2006
    Location:
    Philly
    Greetings Lear & gentlemen. Lear, the Al Pacino movie is 'Carlito's Way'. I salute you and all who have the presence of mind & strength of character to walk away. You are correct in saying the evil-doers can sense you. When good energy and bad energy come into contact, one sees the other 100% I am a Christian, and have been persecuted most of my life so far. I have been laughed at, mocked, punched, beaten with fists, boots, sticks, and almost every other thing a person can use as a weapon. I have been spit on, falsely accused, treated like **** all my life. And by the grace of God, I am still standing. The only times I ever used a fist, were in a few occassions where the honour of a woman was at stake. I don't care if I come across as 17th century or not. Chivalry is not dead..not yet [​IMG] I start every day this way, to set my mind for the day. When I wake, I pray; 'I am yours almighty God. Do with me as you wish' From that point to the rest of the day, I will try to use every skill I have to avoid confrontations. Avoid eye contact with creepy people. eyes are magnets. Well...sometimes there's no avoiding it, correct? If & when confrontation strikes, I have a few modest but powerful tools in combat... Example: A physical confrontation whereby I am being threatened with physical violence, I'll say, 'OK Pal...you try any rough stuff...and I am going to BLEED all over you!' and give a wink. Using comedy, it gives the moron a way out of his stupidity without him 'losing face' It has worked 100% You know the 2 old 'rules of arguing with idiots' [​IMG] Rule 1) Never argue with an idiot, because he (she) will only drag you down to his level, and then beat you with experience. Rule 2) Never argue with an idiot, because anyone coming late to the conversation, will not be able to determine which of you is the idiot. [​IMG] Instead, say 'Thank You' aloud, for all to see & hear...that any and all witnesses will see who is the trouble-maker, and who is the gentlemen. Then get the heck away from the evil-doer. Seems like you are a victim of afore-mentioned Rule 2. If you won't mind, I share this with you.... Hostility from the World (the words of Jesus) "If the world hates you, remember that the world hated me first. If you belonged to the world, then the world would love you like it loves its own people. But I have chosen you out of the world. So you don't belong to the world. That is why the world hates you. Remember the lesson I told you: A servant is not greater than his master. If people did wrong to me, then they will do wrong to you too. And if people obeyed my teaching, then they will obey yours too. - John 15:18-20 and these: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/...203&version=9; http://www.prayerguide.org.uk/stfrancis.htm God bless all of you who persevere in the face of bad behaviour. It will be by our example, that lost souls are encouraged to become gentlemen. It is our torch to hold high; our time to prepare those who follow in our place. Those who are afflicted need only to be shown the light. It costs us nothing to return hatred with compassion. Peace gentlemen. [​IMG]
    [​IMG] Maybe I never get into fights because I'm not religious.
     
  6. StopPolloition

    StopPolloition Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    575
    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2008
    Location:
    USA
    Greetings Lear & gentlemen......

    Is this guy being serious?
     
  7. heavy D

    heavy D Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    84
    Joined:
    May 14, 2008
    The bottom line is: I am simply NOT a fighter, never have been, not that sure I could ever be.




    Well the first thing you have to realize and accept is that no matter how civilized you feel you are, you're still an animal. You still have those instincts deep down no matter how "evolved" you are. The fact that you have a little more control over your animal than others doesn't mean it's not there.

    And I agree with you that it's almost always best to walk away from a fight. I haven't been in a fight in years. But part of the reason is I'm in touch with my animal, and there's more to it than the physical side. Someone earlier mentioned predators and prey, and there's a lot of truth to that. You don't have to walk around like some kind of cromagnon alpha male, but being in touch with that side of you will give you a better insight into how to handle these things, and people can see that on you before you even open your mouth. And I agree, if you get some training in how to handle yourself physically I think you'll feel even less of a need to want to stand up to these situations. It's sounds backwards, but the more confidence you have in your abilities the less you feel like you need to use them. It's a lot easier to talk your way out of something, kill 'em with kindness, defuse the situation with humor, etc if are doing it with the timing and rhythm of a predator rather than prey.

    As long as we're talking about movies there's one I'd recommend, it's called Four Friends and is directed by Arthur Penn. The main character is an American immigrant and deals with something similar in that he's a pacifist and an intelligent guy, but he keeps getting knocked down. Worth a watch I think.
     
  8. ysc

    ysc Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    2,301
    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2008
    Location:
    London
    All of the talk about how you present yourself - whether you give of the impression of a victim or not is kind of missing the point, I agree with the concept in general but it doesn't really hold true with what Lear is talking about.

    If I understand him correctly he is talking about violent chavs, a special problem almost unique to the UK as far as I can tell, and you can be as confident as you like but the fact is if you walk past them and you are not wearing a tracksuit and trainers with your tracksuit tucked into your socks, or whatever their local uniform is you run the risk of attracting their attention.
    They are not looking to rob you (although if you lose a fight with a bunch of them they may rob you), they may be drunk but they are often aggressive even when they are not, they will heckle you, or body-check you as you walk past, more or less regardless of what you look like, if you don't look like one of them.
    I, a fairly physically slight guy occasionally get stick from them sometimes but just as often so does my shaven headed several hundred pound boxer/martial artist friend and plenty of other tough guys I know, so in fact sometimes does my girlfriend. I have found I get more trouble walking down the street in some English towns than I have done in poor areas of Mexico and Peru, the culture of casual/nuisance violence here has become a real problem. It is not big serious stuff for the most part, just teenagers being dick heads, but it is all the time in some areas, and it is a real pain in the ass.

    Short of carrying an assault rifle and a sign saying "I kill people" when you walk around you can't avoid this in some areas of Britain now, and it is always better to walk away. The fact is plenty of them act as if they are too stupid to realise the consequences of their actions, even though the consequence might be them getting beaten down. Not all people who look like "chavs" are violent, it is a minority, but a fairly irritating one and unless you have no other option you should not fight, even if you win the fight just by fighting with a chav you have lost.
     
  9. bobdobalina

    bobdobalina Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    233
    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2007
    If I understand him correctly he is talking about violent chavs, a special problem almost unique to the UK as far as I can tell, and you can be as confident as you like but the fact is if you walk past them and you are not wearing a tracksuit and trainers with your tracksuit tucked into your socks, or whatever their local uniform is you run the risk of attracting their attention.

    Short of setting fore to the council houses and shooting everyone who tries to escape, how would a good Right-winger seek to solve the problem of the UK's chav lumpenprole?
     
  10. ysc

    ysc Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    2,301
    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2008
    Location:
    London
    Well I am a lefty, so my solutions are education and so on. I think you covered most of the conservatives policy on the problem actually, apart from that I think the conservative parties ideas mostly revolve around telling them all they should go and get jobs, because that's how they were successful, Eton had nothing to do with it, and national service to help them "build character" Also this: To be honest I don't think anyone has a good idea, it is not just kids who come from "bad" backgrounds, plenty of them have parents who work and have no idea what little twats their teenagers are when left out on the street, it is a serious problem at the core of our society at the moment, deep selfishness and a casual attitude towards violence. Some sort of national service might not be a terrible idea - so long as it wasn't military national service - and better child care and provision of things for kids to do - youth centres and so on.
     
  11. Marcus Aurelius

    Marcus Aurelius Member

    Messages:
    6
    Joined:
    Apr 19, 2009
    Walk away when you can... even if it hurts your pride. One should only engage in a physical fight when necessary to protect yourself or another. Clearly I am stating the law; but more precisely, I am stating the harsh reality of what I will call combat. When two adults fight, one may die, and it might be you. I do not fight for fun or ego. I will fight to survive, and engage in all that is utterly ruthless, and without reservation, to pursue that end.

    There is another maxim: If you don't want to get into a bar fight, stay out of bars. I get the impression that many of the listed circumstances took place in suspect environments. Alcohol and other intoxicants, and places where they are served... including sports bars, ball parks, parties, etc... can be trouble. Read the warning signs, and get out... or better yet, don't go in.
     
  12. Reggs

    Reggs Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,528
    Joined:
    Mar 11, 2006
    Location:
    The Internet
    I don't know what to say.

    Walking away always sounds logical. I've done it once, but it made me feel very bad, and I regret not fighting. I'm older now, so it might not be the case if it were to happen today.

    I'm old fashioned when it comes to women. If I ever do get in a fight, self defence aside, I'm sure it will be in defence of, or retaliation for a girlfriend/fiance/wife.
     
  13. nomed

    nomed Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    106
    Joined:
    Jan 3, 2009
    You guys think way to much. Just fight, it's fun.
     
  14. Tardek

    Tardek Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    701
    Joined:
    Dec 30, 2008
    You guys think way to much. Just fight, it's fun.

    Are you a chav?
     
  15. sho'nuff

    sho'nuff Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    22,225
    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2006
    Location:
    Irvine
    Lear,
    No need to fight. or even think about it. A gentleman will always find a way to settle things down. turn anger into a smile. yield when you have to.
     
  16. makushin

    makushin Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    111
    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2007
    Please. It's not that simple. If being a gentleman involves getting your faced bashed into pulp, then I suppose you're right.
     
  17. needler

    needler Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    210
    Joined:
    Sep 19, 2008
    Short of setting fore to the council houses and shooting everyone who tries to escape, how would a good Right-winger seek to solve the problem of the UK's chav lumpenprole?

    Import the second amendment!

    Seriously, one of my british friends was telling me about the epidemic of happy slapping, where the chavs run around and slap people across the face hard then run away while their friends record it. I was shocked since something like that is largely inconcievable in the US, but I wasn't sure why.

    Then I realized... guns. You go around happy slapping in Texas, your life expectancy is probably measured in days. Not that they doesn't cause lots of other problems, but hey, a small price to pay for chav control.
     
  18. Tck13

    Tck13 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,749
    Joined:
    Mar 9, 2006
    Location:
    Philly
    Short of setting fore to the council houses and shooting everyone who tries to escape, how would a good Right-winger seek to solve the problem of the UK's chav lumpenprole?
    I was thinking about this today. I'll bet one of these punks would run home crying to mommy if they got cracked (or pepper sprayed) after slapping someone.
     
  19. ysc

    ysc Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    2,301
    Joined:
    Nov 18, 2008
    Location:
    London
    I was thinking about this today. I'll bet one of these punks would run home crying to mommy if they got cracked (or pepper sprayed) after slapping someone.

    The problem is telling the pussy chav who will run away from the hardcore psycho chav who if you are unlucky will stab you/call his mates and have the whole lot of them fuck you up. Also most of the violent ones seem to have little to no gasp on the consequences of their actions - whether that be a beat down because they were harassing someone they shouldn't have, or a prison sentence because they stabbed someone. This makes them dangerous.

    I have seen things go both ways, It is very satisfying when you see some lairy little fucker get his comeuppance.
    I remember a friend of mine being accosted by this guy demanding money from him, my friend punched the guy down threw a few pennies from his pocket on him and walked off, but on the flip side I remember a couple of guys I know being confronted by a few chavs and deciding to fight it out - they were both big guys and on the rugby team, it went fine till more chavs turned up and they got fairly badly beaten up.
    An acquaintance at university was stabbed to death on a train after intervening in a fight with a chav.
    Since you often can't tell which variety of chav it will be, and they generally don't hold with any concepts like fighting fair its not worth the risk, no matter how satisfying it might be when it goes right.
     
  20. makushin

    makushin Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    111
    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2007
    This Chav thing is interesting. I've never heard of this type of behavior in the supposedly ultra violent US.

    Actually now that I think about it, some native Hawaiians act in a similar manner. Groups will randomly beat down white boys at night... happened to a couple friends of mine.
     

Share This Page

Styleforum is proudly sponsored by