1. Welcome to the new Styleforum!

    We hope you’re as excited as we are to hang out in the new place. There are more new features that we’ll announce in the near future, but for now we hope you’ll enjoy the new site.

    We are currently fine-tuning the forum for your browsing pleasure, so bear with any lingering dust as we work to make Styleforum even more awesome than it was.

    Oh, and don’t forget to head over to the Styleforum Journal, because we’re giving away two pairs of Carmina shoes to celebrate our move!

    Please address any questions about using the new forum to support@styleforum.net

    Cheers,

    The Styleforum Team

    Dismiss Notice

What's the First Thing You Did When You Got Out of Jail?

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by NORE, Mar 1, 2012.

  1. NORE

    NORE Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,495
    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2010
    Location:
    Back On Here
  2. NORE

    NORE Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,495
    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2010
    Location:
    Back On Here
    Fine. I'll start.

    This one time me and a guy I was locked up with got sprung at the same time. Upon breathing in the fresh air his first exhalation included, "yo, I'm about to go pick up a couple of bricks. You in?".

    I'm thinking, this dude seriously doesn't like freedom. So we part ways and my first inclination is to get a good shower after taking a proper dump, changing and burning the clothes with which I was clad for the horrendous past few days. (Was it weeks? Months? Oh well) Then dunking something in someone's donut.

    I bump into him randomly sometime later in Harlem. We briefly started speaking when he caught sight of a plump chica, and interrupting our meaningless banter he hollered at teh fattie; "Yo! Gordie. Never change. Stay just like that. You all that, ma. Come here."

    Shocked I left and wrote him off to the chronically institutionalized.

    What's your story?
     
  3. grundletaint

    grundletaint Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,216
    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2007
    dude. i'm that dude, man. you just fucked yourself.
     
  4. NORE

    NORE Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,495
    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2010
    Location:
    Back On Here
    What color and brand sweater did I give you when the CO came to get me?
     
  5. grundletaint

    grundletaint Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,216
    Joined:
    Dec 27, 2007
    You gave me your pudding and a BJ
     
    1 person likes this.
  6. mordecai

    mordecai Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    11,479
    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2008
    Location:
    Los Angeles
    [VIDEO][/VIDEO]
     
  7. NORE

    NORE Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,495
    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2010
    Location:
    Back On Here
    

    Wrong. Sorry. Next contestant please.
     
  8. Trompe le Monde

    Trompe le Monde Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    2,004
    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2009
    shower, and a steak dinner
     
  9. Texasmade

    Texasmade Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,915
    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2008
    Location:
    Houston, TX
    After I got bonded out by my friends, they took me to eat. After that I got my car drove home, took a dump, shower, then a nap.

    For some reason when you're in jail everyone says "bonded out" but everyone outside of jail says "bailed out".
     
  10. NORE

    NORE Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,495
    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2010
    Location:
    Back On Here
    Depends on the crime and your sheet, if the judge grants you bond you can get sprung with just 10% of your bail. Some dudes only get a cash bail which means you have to pay all of it if you want to get sprung. Last time I got pinched I got a cash bail :(
     
    Last edited: Mar 5, 2012
  11. yywwyy

    yywwyy Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,750
    Joined:
    May 8, 2011
    Location:
    NY
    Fucking criminals.
     
  12. Harold falcon

    Harold falcon Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    27,420
    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2009
    Location:
    NE PA
    I always try to schedule jail visits for late in the day so that immediately afterwards I don't have to go to the office but instead can start drinking.
     
  13. NORE

    NORE Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,495
    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2010
    Location:
    Back On Here
    Why not start drinking on the way to jail?
     
  14. Harold falcon

    Harold falcon Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    27,420
    Joined:
    Dec 6, 2009
    Location:
    NE PA
    

    They might not let me in if I was intoxicated.
     
  15. NORE

    NORE Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,495
    Joined:
    Dec 3, 2010
    Location:
    Back On Here
    They would if you were also driving ;)
     
  16. MrGoodBytes

    MrGoodBytes Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    412
    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2010
    never been jailed but I did get several dozen calls from hookers trying to get bailed out.... apparently some pimp was giving out my number as an emergency contact... Interesting conversations to say the least.
     
  17. lasbar

    lasbar Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    26,133
    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2006
    Location:
    FOLKESTONE
    Could have been but nver been..

    I will go straight to see my kids after stopping at a whore house..
     
  18. whiteslashasian

    whiteslashasian Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    11,809
    Joined:
    Aug 20, 2008
    

    Begs the question....why did a Pimp have your number?
     
  19. lasbar

    lasbar Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    26,133
    Joined:
    Oct 13, 2006
    Location:
    FOLKESTONE
    

    He must be his Anonymous Sexual Addiction's mentor..
     
  20. Neo_Version 7

    Neo_Version 7 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    19,625
    Joined:
    Nov 26, 2007
    Easy. I would do something that could get me a harsher sentence.
     

Share This Page

Styleforum is proudly sponsored by