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Movies that blow

Discussion in 'Entertainment, Culture, and Sports' started by Matt, Mar 18, 2006.

  1. skalogre

    skalogre Well-Known Member

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    What about Bela Lugosi's last ersatz role? Dying in the middle like that is throughly unprofessional.

    [​IMG]


    True but the thing is a cult classic. Plus it would be too easy a target [​IMG] .
     
  2. Matt

    Matt Well-Known Member

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    every single movie I saw on the plane to and from France blew.

    Watched the first bit of Fun with Dick and Jane, but as soon as I saw Jim Carrey and Tea Leone in it, I new I wasnt going to make it. I lasted maybe 20 minutes before it got too annoying.

    Switched to watch The Matador. I like Pierce Brosnan, but the sleazy moustache thing was bugging me and the plot kinda felt like something exciting was supposed to be happening but never quite got there. Fell asleep and didnt bother to resume it.

    Watched Cheaper by the Dozen 2.

    Enough said.

    Coming back I read a lot, but watched Rumor Has It, which I thought was basically pretty crappy. Harmless I guess, but crappy nonetheless.
     
  3. Margaret

    Margaret Well-Known Member

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    Yeah, yeah, American Sci-Fi, comedies, family films -- I just assume they have a 50/50 chance of being a complete waste of time. But when a foreign/'art' film just flat out sucks, I'm really disappointed. 'Farewell, My Concubine'? Yeah. And don't let the doorknob hit ya where the good Lord split ya. Not even Gong Li could salvage it.
     
  4. metaphysician

    metaphysician Well-Known Member

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    'Farewell, My Concubine'

    What turned you off: the interminable length, the painful Chinese opera, the cheesy melodrama, or the unsatisfying ending? All of the above?
     
  5. Margaret

    Margaret Well-Known Member

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    What turned you off: the interminable length, the painful Chinese opera, the cheesy melodrama, or the unsatisfying ending? All of the above?

    No, no, yes, yes.

    None of the characters were particularly interesting (except the young acrobat who, unfortunately, commits suicide early on); the artistic, cultural or political elements of the story were not illuminated in any meaningful way. It was just a boring, melodramatic, aimless waste of time.
     
  6. Matt

    Matt Well-Known Member

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    saw MI3 tonight.

    sucked.

    i liked the first two for what they were (ie big loud special fx explosion money machines), this one just felt like a rehash of half a dozen scenes from other movies (notably True Lies, from which it stole its honey-I'm-a-spy plot as well as the Florida Keys bridge scene)
     
  7. faustian bargain

    faustian bargain Well-Known Member

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    saw MI3 tonight.

    sucked.

    i liked the first two for what they were (ie big loud special fx explosion money machines), this one just felt like a rehash of half a dozen scenes from other movies (notably True Lies, from which it stole its honey-I'm-a-spy plot as well as the Florida Keys bridge scene)


    clearly you are possessed by thetans.
     
  8. Matt

    Matt Well-Known Member

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    clearly you are possessed by thetans.
    The disharmonious relationship between me and my thetans is what causes all sickness and disease in the world.


    (thank you urbandictionary.com!)
     
  9. tbabes

    tbabes Well-Known Member

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    Worst movie I ever paid money to see was "Practical Magic" with Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman. Horrible. It was my 3rd or 4th date with my wife though -- can't remember if it was before or after the Lilith Fair date.
     
  10. LabelKing

    LabelKing Well-Known Member

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    Any Jennifer Lopez/Ben Affleck movie deserves this thread.
     
  11. faustian bargain

    faustian bargain Well-Known Member

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    Worst movie I ever paid money to see was "Practical Magic" with Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman. Horrible. It was my 3rd or 4th date with my wife though -- can't remember if it was before or after the Lilith Fair date.

    +1 Funny
     
  12. DocHolliday

    DocHolliday Well-Known Member

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    "Superman Returns" was shockingly nonsensical.
     
  13. acidboy

    acidboy Well-Known Member

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    Any Jennifer Lopez/Ben Affleck movie deserves this thread.

    we're talking about movies, not egocentric talentless 120 minute trainwrecks captured on film. [​IMG]
     
  14. Tokyo Slim

    Tokyo Slim Well-Known Member

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    I love Flash Gordon, but only because its a huge pile of crap.

    I like Showgirls for much the same reason. Crap from beginning to end.

    I'm sure there are some others too... I'm really fond of shitty movies.
     
  15. acidboy

    acidboy Well-Known Member

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    that "the punisher" movie. total trainwreck. thomas jane is the new post-highlander christopher lambert. rebecca romijn successfully placed herself in the hollywood feeding trough a few notches lower, john travolta an overweight sadistic crime lord?, and the forgettable secondary characters are so crappy you'd wish everyone dies in the end! [​IMG]
     
  16. Tokyo Slim

    Tokyo Slim Well-Known Member

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    that "the punisher" movie. total trainwreck. thomas jane is the new post-highlander christopher lambert. rebecca romijn successfully placed herself in the hollywood feeding trough a few notches lower, john travolta an overweight sadistic crime lord?, and the forgettable secondary characters are so crappy you'd wish everyone dies in the end!

    [​IMG]


    But was it better than the Dolph Lundgren "Punisher" movie? I think it was, by a small margin. Since the Dolph Lundgren movie really had absolutely NOTHING to do with The Punisher.

    [​IMG]
     
  17. RJman

    RJman Well-Known Member

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    Ooh! But it had Lou Gossett, Jr.! And the DVD includes the German language theatrical trailer!!!!
     
  18. JBZ

    JBZ Well-Known Member

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    Speaking of bad Louis Gossett, Jr. movies, anyone here remember Enemy Mine with LGJ and Dennis Quaid? Shudderingly horrible.

    I still don't know how LGJ ever got that oscar - it's as if a journeyman middle reliever threw a no hitter during a spot start.
     
  19. acidboy

    acidboy Well-Known Member

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    Speaking of bad Louis Gossett, Jr. movies, anyone here remember Enemy Mine with LGJ and Dennis Quaid? Shudderingly horrible.

    I still don't know how LGJ ever got that oscar - it's as if a journeyman middle reliever threw a no hitter during a spot start.


    and don't forget iron eagle and iron eagle 2!

    though he did a movie with chuck norris, too, firewalker. so that redeems himself.
     
  20. mnemonic

    mnemonic Well-Known Member

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    WOW!

    i'll go with:

    Rumplestilskin, with such great taglines as F**keth Me!

    Mitchell, with Joe Don Baker. MST3K said it best, "Never corner Mitchell, see how he reacts!!"

    Leprechaun in the Hood!

    i also hated lost in translation, pearl harbor, and kindergarten cop.

    but REALLY: WHO framed roger rabbit? i dont buy that it was christopher lloyd's character. jessica was playing patty cake with other TOONS in TOONLAND.
     

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