1. Welcome to the new Styleforum!

    We hope you’re as excited as we are to hang out in the new place. There are more new features that we’ll announce in the near future, but for now we hope you’ll enjoy the new site.

    We are currently fine-tuning the forum for your browsing pleasure, so bear with any lingering dust as we work to make Styleforum even more awesome than it was.

    Oh, and don’t forget to head over to the Styleforum Journal, because we’re giving away two pairs of Carmina shoes to celebrate our move!

    Please address any questions about using the new forum to support@styleforum.net

    Cheers,

    The Styleforum Team

    Dismiss Notice

Less than a week's notice for black tie wedding

Discussion in 'Menswear Advice' started by RandMan14, Apr 18, 2016.

  1. RandMan14

    RandMan14 Member

    Messages:
    5
    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2016
    Hi All,

    Just joined the site a few minutes ago! So here's the scoop: my girlfriend's boss got drunk last night after a long and stressful day of work and told my girlfriend that he would absolutely love if her and I could attend his wedding..... This Saturday. The website for their wedding lists the attire as "black tie". I emailed back and forth with him this afternoon and he told me that he knows he gave me ridiculously short notice and "not to worry" about the black tie part; just wear what I want. I wouldn't have time at this point anyway to go out and rent a tux so that obviously leaves me in a suit at this point. Of course I don't want to look like a complete goober so I need some guidance on what to wear. Wedding is at 1:00 pm in a nice church in downtown Manhattan, and the reception afterwards is at Blue Hill at Stone Barn. I have about 10 or 12 different dress shirts and a lot of ties, the ties most of which are patterned in some way or another (some tiny and conservative, others more colorful and bold, plaids etc.). Going out and buying an appropriate tie in the next few days is of course no issue. I have two tailored suits, one is dark grey/charcoal and the other is a more medium to light grey. So I'm thinking the following:

    • Charcoal suit
    • Black cap toe oxfords with black laces (I have lots of colored laces I wear at work but I'm assuming those are a no-no)
    • Solid white shirt (or something else?)
    • Simple white linen pocket square with thin light blue border
    • No clue about the tie
    • No clue about the socks
    So solid white shirt or maybe a light blue? I'm guessing white is what you guys will recommend. As far as the tie goes, should it be solid and clean with no patterns or color whatsoever? If it should be plain what color/s? Black? Grey? And lastly the socks: black? Dark grey? No patterns or colors?


    I appreciate any guidance you're willing to share,
    Randy
     
  2. Shirtmaven

    Shirtmaven Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,335
    Joined:
    Dec 26, 2003
    Location:
    NYC
    your outfit sounds fine
    no colored laces.

    You live or work in NYC?
    rothman's has a good selection of tuxedos in stock
    under $600
    a tux does not have to cost a fortune
    even men's warehouse, if it fits properly.
     
  3. starro

    starro Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    520
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2016
    Shirt: Solid white is preferable to blue, or patterns.

    Tie: Solids are nice, especially with a grenadine weave. If you want patterns, make sure they're muted: nothing louder than stripes or minidots. Color-wise: this depends on if it's in the day or at night, and whether most guests will be in tuxedos (black tie vs black tie preferred). If at night (and most in tuxes), then the color should be as dark + close to black as possible (midnight navy is of course another option). If during the day, you have more color options.

    Socks: No biggie on this one. They are not even supposed to be seen. Can't go wrong with solid black

    good luck
     
  4. starro

    starro Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    520
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2016
    Come to think of it, if you just get a black bow tie and tuxedo shirt (or if one of your white dress shirts can pass for a tux shirt), and your charcoal suit is dark enough, I'll bet that most people wouldn't even notice you are wearing "incorrect" black tie. something to consider
     
  5. RandMan14

    RandMan14 Member

    Messages:
    5
    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2016
    Any input on the tie?
     
  6. Caustic Man

    Caustic Man Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    7,321
    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2012
    He's having a black tie wedding at 1pm? Don't worry about looking like a goober because he's already taken care of that. [​IMG]
     
  7. RandMan14

    RandMan14 Member

    Messages:
    5
    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2016
    Sounds a bit too risky for me - thanks for the suggestion though.
     
  8. RandMan14

    RandMan14 Member

    Messages:
    5
    Joined:
    Apr 18, 2016
    Yeah - I found that pretty interesting (odd) myself.
     
  9. starro

    starro Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    520
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2016
    Well, technically, the correct black-tie get-up for daytime is a stroller, but hardly anyone knows what it is, let alone owns one. Hell, many tailors have no freaking idea!
     
    Last edited: Apr 18, 2016
  10. Caustic Man

    Caustic Man Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    7,321
    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2012
    A stroller isn't black tie, it's daytime semi-formal. Daytime formal would be Morning Dress.
     
  11. starro

    starro Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    520
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2016
    Getting a little bored there? [​IMG]

    Stroller aka Stresemann is daytime lounge, just as evening lounge is the dinner jacket. So stroller is what the guests should be wearing before 6pm in order to be at black tie's formality level.

    Morning dress (assuming you mean the morning cutaway coat) is a body coat. Apples and oranges.
     
  12. LA Guy

    LA Guy Opposite Santa Staff Member

    Messages:
    33,238
    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2002
    Location:
    Moscow, Idaho
    Moving this to Menswear advice. I can talk morning dress all day long, but really, let's just try to answer the OPs questions, please?
     
  13. Caustic Man

    Caustic Man Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    7,321
    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2012
    The dinner jacket (aka tuxedo) supplanted full dress as the acceptable formal evening wear over time. The stroller never did that for day wear and remains semi-formal, especially considering it is relatively unknown today. Your knowledge of the subject lacks nuance but since you are new I will excuse it.
     
    Last edited: Apr 18, 2016
    1 person likes this.
  14. starro

    starro Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    520
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2016
    Man, someone really has too much free time on his hands! @Caustic Man , I would heed LA's warning and stick to advice giving. But since you insist...

    White tie is still alive and well, and to anyone who knows, is a step above black-tie/DJ in formality. Let me break it down for you (and anyone interested):
    White tie -> Evening formal
    Black tie -> Evening semi-formal
    Morning dress -> day formal
    Stroller -> Day semi-formal

    Ergo, white tie tailcoat is to morning dress cutaway as black tie tuxedo is to stroller. That's alot of terms to juggle, especially if English is a second language.


    So you're an expert? Prove it by giving the key differences between a body and a lounge coat. If you can't without having to look it up, cut the bullying crap out.
     
  15. LA Guy

    LA Guy Opposite Santa Staff Member

    Messages:
    33,238
    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2002
    Location:
    Moscow, Idaho
    If you guys really feel like discussing the niceties of formality in morning and evening dress, please tell me, and I'll take those posts to a new thread in CM. (for real)
     
  16. starro

    starro Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    520
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2016
    I certainly don't. Just trying to provide information relevant to the OPs questions. My interest in discussing morning dress has completely waned by now, so I'm not going to go into it unless my points get misrepresented. peace out
     
  17. Caustic Man

    Caustic Man Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    7,321
    Joined:
    Apr 17, 2012
    I don't think there is a need for it. We've discussed these things extensively for years in threads specific to strollers, morning dress, black tie, etc. Just because one newb wasn't privy to it is no reason to start a new thread. Of course, you are the man so it's your prerogative to start one or not.
     
  18. starro

    starro Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    520
    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2016
    Not giving substance, avoiding the issue, name calling: the tell-tale signs of someone who's got nothing to say. At this point, I'm out; feel free debating morning dress with your hand.
     
    Last edited: Apr 18, 2016
  19. LA Guy

    LA Guy Opposite Santa Staff Member

    Messages:
    33,238
    Joined:
    Mar 8, 2002
    Location:
    Moscow, Idaho
    Stop guys, seriously. Both of you.
     
  20. chippneckwear

    chippneckwear Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    80
    Joined:
    Feb 2, 2015
    If you wanted to rent a Dinner suit you will have no problem doing it in NYC and getting it the same day.

    Since you do not choose to do that, your dark grey suit, white shirt and grey or black Grenadine tie will work. My guess is you will not be the only individual attending who is not wearing a dinner suit.

    Paul Winston
    Winston Tailors/ www.chippneckwear.com
    212 687-0850
     

Share This Page

Styleforum is proudly sponsored by