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How can I pull myself out of this self-induced rut?

Discussion in 'General Chat' started by robbie, Apr 19, 2009.

  1. kwilkinson

    kwilkinson Well-Known Member

    Messages:
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    Chicago
    This forum is generally about expensive (nice) things: expensive clothes, expensive furniture, expensive art, expensive food, expensive homes/apartments, expensive cities, expensive travel. Since lots of money is required to obtain expensive things, one would suggest that most involved would be very money-driven.

    I think money is one of the most important things in the world if not the most important. Money allows you to do what you want. Money allows freedom of choice. Money enables happiness and satisfaction.


    No doubt about it. But not everyone on this site is interested in working solely for the point of having enough money to buy expensive things. Just saying, some people are satisfied with being able to pay the bills and having just a little on the side, which is far different from "everybody wants to be wealthy."
     
  2. Threak

    Threak Well-Known Member

    Messages:
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    Feb 5, 2009
    Jesus Christ.

    You are 23 and working at Target because you're too much of a loser to take genuine action in your life. Your post is full of self-justifications and boils down to a list of things you don't want to do because they are "not for you." Wow. Ever think of doing something that you did not enjoy 100% in order to make some money and begin some sort of career? Stop being a lazy sack of shit working a mindless job and get up and do something with your life. You must be incredibly immature to say "I am just not there" at age twenty three. Grow the fuck up and decide what you want to do with yourself and do it. Otherwise you will wake up at 45 wondering where your life went. I can't believe you are getting married as directionless as you are.

    I apologize for the tone of this post but I feel it is well deserved.


    +1/2

    You're getting married. I don't think you would really like to have kids, raise them on a Target salary, and have them working at the checkout stand next to you in 20 years. You may not be able to find a job you have a passion for, but is there anything you're good at? Just think about it, are you a hands-on person, or a thinker, or a technical type? Find a strength and put it to work. You may not love the job, but it would be more fulfilling than working a job high school kids do during the summer.
     
  3. Flambeur

    Flambeur Well-Known Member

    Messages:
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    Jesus Christ.

    You are 23 and working at Target because you're too much of a loser to take genuine action in your life. Your post is full of self-justifications and boils down to a list of things you don't want to do because they are "not for you." Wow. Ever think of doing something that you did not enjoy 100% in order to make some money and begin some sort of career? Stop being a lazy sack of shit working a mindless job and get up and do something with your life. You must be incredibly immature to say "I am just not there" at age twenty three. Grow the fuck up and decide what you want to do with yourself and do it. Otherwise you will wake up at 45 wondering where your life went. I can't believe you are getting married as directionless as you are.

    I apologize for the tone of this post but I feel it is well deserved.



    beat me to it....


    To summarize the OP:

    - Don't want to get a degree (work) because taking classes is too hard (work is too hard). Especially, taking classes I am not interested in is too hard for me!

    - Looking for a job that doesn't require education (work) and provides money to allow someone to pursue interests/leisure activities (not work).

    - Don't see myself going to trade school because I wouldn't find myself "enjoying" it (work)

    - Don't see myself being a welder (work), electrician (work), apprentice (work)

    - Don't see myself figuring out what I want to do because personality tests don't show me careers that will bring me fulfillment (See above, I want to do no work to be able to not work)

    - If I have to "tolerate a job/career" (direct quote) I at least want to make money.

    - My gf will marry me even if I am flat broke. I guess she will take care of herself and our kids while I work at Target.

    .
    .
    .

    Are you fucking serious? This is a prime welfare candidate. Don't want to do anything (especially if it is not completely enjoyable) but want to make money. The lack of self-responsibility is astounding, and people here encourage it!


    +1 again...
     
  4. username79

    username79 Well-Known Member

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    Apr 1, 2007
    No doubt about it. But not everyone on this site is interested in working solely for the point of having enough money to buy expensive things. Just saying, some people are satisfied with being able to pay the bills and having just a little on the side, which is far different from "everybody wants to be wealthy."
    Just to expand on my money-is-all-important comment: After a certain age, I would like to do whatever I want (with reason, of course.) I have a different hobby or interest practically every day, and I would like to explore whatever comes to my mind. Travel to a different country on a whim. Wake up on a Wednesday and decide over breakfast to fly to Paris. Decide to spend the next week in Tokio. Decide the next week to enroll in an intensive cooking seminar in NYC. Read the list of best restaurants in the world on SF, start knocking them down, one weekend after the other. The above requires quite a bit of money to sustain but is financially possible and attainable with proper planning, hard work, long hours and some sacrifice, especially in the twenties. I am already well on my way, and if I had sat around post-high school playing with my dick and complaining about how working "wasn't for me" I would never stand a chance of getting close. It's not about the love of money, it's about the love of the freedom that comes with it.
     
  5. kwilkinson

    kwilkinson Well-Known Member

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    Location:
    Chicago
    Money for freedom's sake I can understand and empathize with. Money for money's sake, well I must say I don't understand it but I still empathize. [​IMG]
     
  6. delirium

    delirium Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    394
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    Jul 2, 2008
    robbie,

    i think you're doing fine. the fact that you have these goals for yourself is great , and i'm sure it'll work out if you give enough thought to what it is you really, really, really want to do.

    i'm pulling for you.

    people here should chill. not everyone has the same background. it's not like he's doing nothing...
     
  7. robbie

    robbie Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    6,424
    Joined:
    May 3, 2007
    Location:
    Nebraska
    To summarize the OP:

    - Don't want to get a degree (work) because taking classes is too hard (work is too hard). Especially, taking classes I am not interested in is too hard for me!

    I do want to get a degree.

    - Looking for a job that doesn't require education (work) and provides money to allow someone to pursue interests/leisure activities (not work).

    I am looking for something temporary that doesn't require education, to make money to pursue education.

    - Don't see myself going to trade school because I wouldn't find myself "enjoying" it (work)

    I haven't mentioned being against a trade school, only that it isn't my first choice.

    - Don't see myself being a welder (work), electrician (work), apprentice (work)
    see above.

    - Don't see myself figuring out what I want to do because personality tests don't show me careers that will bring me fulfillment (See above, I want to do no work to be able to not work)

    I've mentioned that I am not against hard work/physical labor... its something I've done, and will gladly do if it is how I am to provide for my future wife and down the road a piece our family.

    - If I have to "tolerate a job/career" (direct quote) I at least want to make money.

    I don't get why this is an issue. I think its saying, I am willing to work something I don't love in order to get by.

    - My gf will marry me even if I am flat broke. I guess she will take care of herself and our kids while I work at Target.
    I mentioned wanting to better myself.

    .
    .
    .

    Are you fucking serious? This is a prime welfare candidate. Don't want to do anything (especially if it is not completely enjoyable) but want to make money. The lack of self-responsibility is astounding, and people here encourage it!



    I live on my own, I pay my bills. As a matter of fact I attended this high school. I worked as much as the law allowed me to at the time (I was 14) in order to pay 80% of my tuition. I did similarly when I was in college.

    I have never, and will never be on unemployment or welfare. I attend church and have a loving supportive family, I don't believe the government owes me anything aside from the ability to pursue life liberty and happiness.

    I am not 'too good' for any job ANY JOB. I am not above education, or work either.

    There is no silver spoon in my mouth, and I feel no sense of entitlement.

    I am simply struggling, and this forum is a community I feel can offer me some insight.


    And FWIW, I inquired about volunteering w/ an adult literacy program. I also hand-wrote a letter to Phil Mooney (historian/archivist for Coca-Cola) inquiring as to the job requirements for a position at the archives of The Coca-Cola Company.
     
  8. Lel

    Lel Well-Known Member

    Messages:
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    May 19, 2007
    Have you just considered taking some time off and traveling?

    Could be anywhere really. Europe, Asia, Australia, even a road trip around the U.S. might provide for some insight.
     
  9. username79

    username79 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    2,144
    Joined:
    Apr 1, 2007
    Have you just considered taking some time off and traveling?

    Could be anywhere really. Europe, Asia, Australia, even a road trip around the U.S. might provide for some insight.


    Driving around aimlessly for a year should help his cause.
     
  10. robbie

    robbie Well-Known Member

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    Nebraska
    ^please... unless you have something constructive to say GTFO of my thread.^
     
  11. Tck13

    Tck13 Well-Known Member

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    Location:
    Philly
    ^please... unless you have something constructive to say GTFO of my thread.^
    Don't even waste your breath. If school is what you really want, don't get sidetracked into thinking you need a lot of money to do it. It'll only take a couple of years and it'll go by very quickly. You'll be able to work summers / evenings. You'll make it through somehow. Everybody makes it through somehow. UPS hires students and you can work 5 hrs a night M-F and I think you still get benefits. A community college to start would be perfect until you get enough credits to transfer. I'd bet you could even do this without any loans. I wish I would've done that. If that's your biggest wish, just do it. Don't worry about the money. If you really want to do it you'll find a way. Don't get bogged down in any negative thinking or put it off and don't think you have to do something else to get you through school. Even staying at target is fine. At least you know that they'll work around your schedule (and you'll have a good place to do an internship and maybe even go further - or not).
     
  12. Teger

    Teger Well-Known Member

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    Richmond, VA
    OK, for like the third and last fucking time ONCE YOU ARE MARRIED YOU ARE IN THE BEST POSITION TO GO TO A 4 YEAR UNIVERSITY FOR FREE. FREE. YOU DO NOT NEED A JOB BECAUSE YOUR TUITION WILL BE 100% PAID FOR BY GRANTS, AND IF YOU HAVE TO TAKE ANY LOANS, THEY WILL BE EXTREMELY LOW INTEREST RATE FEDERALLY SUBSIDIZED LOANS THAT YOU WON'T HAVE TO BEGIN PAYING BACK UNTIL YOU FINISH YOUR DEGREE. NOW GET MARRIED AND APPLY TO A DAMN STATE SCHOOL AND GO. FUCK
     
  13. Pennglock

    Pennglock Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,244
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    Mar 20, 2006
    Driving around aimlessly for a year should help his cause.

    Financial security is a fine thing, but shit, not the end-all existance, especially for a 20-something. There is plenty of time to catch up and provide a comfortable environment for raising kids and retirement even starting after age 30.

    Robbie, realize that there is nothing to lose and no time to waste in getting what you want out of this life. It sounds like you already have a supportive woman who is prioritizing your happiness over money. That puts you way ahead of the curve off the bat, and to hell with people who say youre too young to marry. Go after your big dreams and even if you fall short you'll acquire very valuable knowledge that will help you in other ways, including making a buck, and more importantly you'll grow old with fewer regrets.
     
  14. robbie

    robbie Well-Known Member

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    Nebraska
    teger- being married to a woman involves more than just the legal aspect[​IMG] , but yes once I am married I fully plan on taking your advice.
     
  15. bbaquiran

    bbaquiran Well-Known Member

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    robbie, have you discussed this with your fiancee? Would she be willing or able to support the both of you financially if you were to go back to school or spend time learning a trade?
     
  16. Connemara

    Connemara Well-Known Member

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    Step 1: Get the hell out of Nebraska. [​IMG] I agree with Teger re: the school thing.
     
  17. djohboy

    djohboy New Member

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    Apr 24, 2009
    go to school, its the best investment you can make, and if you pick the right one and work your ass off it'll be worth all those loans too.
     
  18. Flambeur

    Flambeur Well-Known Member

    Messages:
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    robbie,

    i think you're doing fine. the fact that you have these goals for yourself is great , and i'm sure it'll work out if you give enough thought to what it is you really, really, really want to do.

    i'm pulling for you.

    people here should chill. not everyone has the same background. it's not like he's doing nothing...


    He needs some tough fucking love. And he's doing nothing - I was working at Target when I was sixteen.

    Unless he gets his shit together, he's gonna waste his life.

    Have you just considered taking some time off and traveling?

    Could be anywhere really. Europe, Asia, Australia, even a road trip around the U.S. might provide for some insight.


    doesn't really sound like he has money or time to travel.

    I live on my own, I pay my bills. As a matter of fact I attended this high school. I worked as much as the law allowed me to at the time (I was 14) in order to pay 80% of my tuition. I did similarly when I was in college.

    I have never, and will never be on unemployment or welfare. I attend church and have a loving supportive family, I don't believe the government owes me anything aside from the ability to pursue life liberty and happiness.

    I am not 'too good' for any job ANY JOB. I am not above education, or work either.

    There is no silver spoon in my mouth, and I feel no sense of entitlement.

    I am simply struggling, and this forum is a community I feel can offer me some insight.


    And FWIW, I inquired about volunteering w/ an adult literacy program. I also hand-wrote a letter to Phil Mooney (historian/archivist for Coca-Cola) inquiring as to the job requirements for a position at the archives of The Coca-Cola Company.


    I mean dude... Seriously. Get your shit together and either find a career/trade, or go back to school. The whole archivist at Coke position thing is just silly - it's what crazy retirees do. Go get a marketing or finance or food science degree and work for the real Coca-Cola.
     
  19. Dakota rube

    Dakota rube Well-Known Member

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    A bit better than yesterday, all day vomiting for
    I think money is one of the most important things in the world if not the most important.
    I feel very badly for you. And for whatever you might spawn in your lifetime.

    You are a dick.
    Yes he is. Of an amazing measure.

    Financial security is a fine thing, but shit, not the end-all existance, especially for a 20-something ...Robbie, realize that there is nothing to lose and no time to waste in getting what you want out of this life...
    Once again another of your infrequent posts homes in on the truth. Thank you.
     
  20. username79

    username79 Well-Known Member

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    I feel very badly for you. And for whatever you might spawn in your lifetime.
    Why? You can't do shit without money. That makes it pretty important, doesn't it? Think of all the day to day things in your life that are possible with money. You probably have a family that you support and a house that you live in. These things are possible because you have some amount of money. Notice I am not specifying a quantity. http://www.styleforum.net/showpost.p...&postcount=104 Is it really that egregious? I'm glad so many of you on this forum devoted to expensive high-end clothing are actually ascetic monks. I'm clearly in the wrong here, so I hereby retract all my previous statements and agree with others in this thread with the following: Robbie, it's really great that you are 23, have no idea what you want to do with your life, and work at Target (a job someone who hasn't even finished high school could do!) Congratulations, this is really quite OK and you are a success! Perhaps you should take a meandering roadtrip across the United States to celebrate! Maybe spend some time to "find yourself!" Don't do anything that you don't absolutely want to do because as twenty year olds we are all entitled to do exactly what we want! Money isn't important. Great advice and support in this thread all around!
     

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