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I don´t want to live, emotional dependence

post #1 of 52
1/24/09 at 6:59pm
Thread Starter 
Dear friends

I got an emotional dependence sintoma. I can´t forget my last girlfriend. I went to several psichologist who told me I got an emotional dependence sintoma.

A friend of mine called my last girlfriend, who I´m still in love with, A man picked up the phone, he said I´m her boyfriend,she doesn´t wants to even know about him.

I´m in a big depression again. No matter I drive a convertible jaguar ( that soon will have to be sold for the crisis ) with our stylish clothes.. I feel even more separate from the real world and real people.

I don´t drink,snort ... I´m about 31 but I always thinked myself as 80, that is why I like style etc I hardly can get along with people of my age..

I´ll appreciate all your thought about me, thanks
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post #2 of 52
1/24/09 at 7:01pm
i had an horiffic breakup with an older woman at 20. thought it was the end of the world. lost 30lbs in 4 weeks, all i did was sleep.

although it sounds cliche, it takes time to feel better and there will be someone else out there to make you happy.
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post #3 of 52
1/24/09 at 7:02pm
You need to get out of your world and into the real one.

And I smell troll.
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post #4 of 52
1/24/09 at 7:06pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by why View Post
And I smell troll.
+1
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post #5 of 52
1/24/09 at 7:07pm
eh, benefit of doubt. either way, no harm, no foul
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post #6 of 52
1/24/09 at 7:16pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by thekunk07 View Post
i had an horiffic breakup with an older woman at 20. thought it was the end of the world. lost 30lbs in 4 weeks, all i did was sleep.

although it sounds cliche, it takes time to feel better and there will be someone else out there to make you happy.

I´m sleeping from 12 to 16 hours a day.

Why should I be a troll if as an european is not easy for me to explain in english, you can see my older 200 messages. I wish I was a troll folks

In this last 6 months the only thing that made me happy was going out to shopping clothes.. I bought too much that even distants me from the people of my age. My mother, who I´m living again with due to my depression told me to not dress like that and drive her fiat instead on weekends, to meet ordinary girls.

Thanks for your words.
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post #7 of 52
1/24/09 at 9:29pm
All the best to you...
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post #8 of 52
1/24/09 at 9:43pm
My last girlfriend took me one-and-a-half years to get over, just managed to last fall. And I broke up with her. Seriously. And I'm 32. It's hard to explain, but being so upset about losing her, made me so pissed off at myself. For being such a fucking puss about the whole thing. So you get stuck in that self-loathing cycle (either I suck because we couldn't work or I suck because I care so much that we couldn't work) and it's hard to get out of

My only advice is to remain single for a good while longer. Learn to be happy single, don't just jump into another relationship and use it like a band-aid. And don't be bitter towards the next girl. I've moved on and life is great again. Everything is cyclical.
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post #9 of 52
1/24/09 at 10:09pm
Hire hookers to get your rocks off until you buck up and become a man again. Maybe you should go to one of those pickup artist training schools.
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post #10 of 52
1/24/09 at 11:03pm
There's no definite answer to your question. Just realize that what's gone is gone, and that you are being emotionally dependent on her. There are other wonderful women out there. You will certainly meet one or two along the way.
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post #11 of 52
1/25/09 at 2:52am
I got cut up once by a girl who dumped me.

I dated her best friend. It made me feel much better. I really recommend it; or maybe her sister or mother or something, I guess.
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post #12 of 52
1/25/09 at 2:59am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tardek View Post
I dated her best friend. It made me feel much better. I really recommend it; or maybe her sister or mother or something, I guess.

WTF? Hahahaha...
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post #13 of 52
1/25/09 at 3:03am
Quote:
Originally Posted by Azure View Post
I´m sleeping from 12 to 16 hours a day.

Why should I be a troll if as an european is not easy for me to explain in english, you can see my older 200 messages. I wish I was a troll folks

In this last 6 months the only thing that made me happy was going out to shopping clothes.. I bought too much that even distants me from the people of my age. My mother, who I´m living again with due to my depression told me to not dress like that and drive her fiat instead on weekends, to meet ordinary girls.

Thanks for your words.

The problem is that you have a very low self esteem, you view yourself as inferior to everybody else, and your girlfriend was your one connection to a normal world, the only thing you had that gave you any worth. Obviously, this is a pathalogical view of reality, and it isn't correct. Your girlfriend isn't what gives you worth, you are. Truly realize this and you'll be home free.
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post #14 of 52
1/25/09 at 3:12am
I am still not over my ex. It takes time. I know it sucks, but other than getting out there and meetin gnew people, and telling yourself that it's for the best, there's not much to do. That said, if you think you are seriously depressed, you should probably see a psychiatrist.
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post #15 of 52
1/25/09 at 3:24am
It seems to me... that you have two problems to resolve.

1. getting over the girlfriend
2. your low self esteem and depression

try not to confuse the two problems. each of these problems you will need to deal with in a different way.

i was in a similiar situation as you... i wanted to jump of a bridge or a building, etc... the very important thing to do is keep busy. Do not sit in bed all day. Try to find something to do. Learn to play the piano, read a book, go for a run, smoke some grass... do anything but sit and think about the woman.

I went to graduate school to help me forget about the woman. it worked. i became so busy that the only time i think about the woman... i start thinking about all of my homework and forget about her instantly.

If you have low self esteem and depression... perhaps u should see a doctor and get some medicine for this. That is not unusual and there is not anything wrong with that.

but like i said... the worst thing to do is sit in bed and be a victim. you cannot dig yourself out of a hole unless you first grab a shovel
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