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I am farting and I don't know how to stop - Page 3

post #31 of 45
12/17/08 at 5:36am
i have a friend with this problem, its becoming less funny and more a serious condition
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post #32 of 45
12/17/08 at 7:17am
Quote:
Originally Posted by SField View Post
I think I've done more than enough of the raunchy posts, but I don't know what's going on anymore. Last night (I actually posted incorrectly in the "what did you east last night", that was 2 nights ago), I quickly went to whole food and bought one of those "ultimate" burgers at their meat counter. I made it with some bacon, which is something I don't normally eat, on a whole wheat bun.

Since about 10pm last night, I have been emiting some of the most foul, vicious smells I can imagine. By 1am I didn't even think that it was funny, and I actually cancelled having drinks with someone because it was seriously that horrible. One fairly sizeable morning constitutional later, I am still unleashing memoirs of Chernobyl from my sit upon. I want this to stop. Last night as I lay in bed I was dropping bombs that I'm sure could qualify my apartment for U.N. weapons inspections. When even you are disgusted by your own foulness, you know there's something wrong.

I eat fairly clean at home but I didn't think 1 strip of fatty bacon would do this. What the fuck is going on!?!?!

go to your doctor instead..
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post #33 of 45
12/17/08 at 2:03pm
Look at your carbohydrate intake as well. Starchy foods cause gas in the stomach to develop.
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post #34 of 45
12/18/08 at 2:51pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by thekunk07 View Post
my farts always smell exactly like what i ate. taco farts. turkey farts. dim sum. anyone else?
Ditto, except if I eat a lot of pistachios.... christ there is nothing worse than a warm, wet pistachio fart. It's the kind of fart that actually burns a little.
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post #35 of 45
12/18/08 at 4:54pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by 98Percent View Post
Look at your carbohydrate intake as well. Starchy foods cause gas in the stomach to develop.

I think you're right. That night I'd eaten an utter meat/fiber bomb (two big hamburgers on two whole foods ultra whole wheat buns) plus I ate a lot of starch. All these problems have gone away. But, it still entertains me to talk about it.
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post #36 of 45
12/18/08 at 4:55pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eason View Post
Yesterday I was a fucking biohazard, I don't know what I could have eaten to cause such horrific pungent and numerous incidents of flatulance.

This was a good effort, but a little generic. I'd suggest adding a little drama, possibly a slight bit of detail without getting too gross. You're well on your way to writing a great fart post.
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post #37 of 45
12/18/08 at 7:23pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by thekunk07 View Post
my farts always smell exactly like what i ate. taco farts. turkey farts. dim sum.

anyone else?
You sir are a liar or someone who always eats fresh cut flowers. I am not sure which I despise more.

http://www.styleforum.net/showpost.p...5&postcount=25
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post #38 of 45
12/18/08 at 7:41pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by SField View Post
This was a good effort, but a little generic. I'd suggest adding a little drama, possibly a slight bit of detail without getting too gross. You're well on your way to writing a great fart post.

I'll add a little drama to it. It seemed like every time I let one go (and this was once every 5 minutes), somebody had to come near me and start doing something, which made me very nervous. Right after I let one out in my chair, another teacher came in and started looking for her USB key all around me, bending down on all fours or something. I hoped to god that the smell had risen above her level, because it was VILE, like opening a hot oven taking a deep breath expecting apple pie, but getting the shit of a dog who had eaten milk, eggs, and lemons all day. While I was teaching I had to roam around the room randomly as I let them go, but I don't think it looked natural as I randomly went from side to side and to the back of the room constantly. Thank god that day is over.
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post #39 of 45
12/19/08 at 1:35am
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eason View Post
I'll add a little drama to it. It seemed like every time I let one go (and this was once every 5 minutes), somebody had to come near me and start doing something, which made me very nervous. Right after I let one out in my chair, another teacher came in and started looking for her USB key all around me, bending down on all fours or something. I hoped to god that the smell had risen above her level, because it was VILE, like opening a hot oven taking a deep breath expecting apple pie, but getting the shit of a dog who had eaten milk, eggs, and lemons all day. While I was teaching I had to roam around the room randomly as I let them go, but I don't think it looked natural as I randomly went from side to side and to the back of the room constantly. Thank god that day is over.

HAHAHAHA

I love when your flatulence affects how you move around a room and the paths you take to avoid dropping a bomb near people.

Lemon makes you fart?
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post #40 of 45
12/19/08 at 1:37am
my stomach looks like i am 8 months pregnant and i am dropping egg bombs. mexican did not agree with me tonight.
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post #41 of 45
12/19/08 at 4:02am
Quote:
Originally Posted by SField View Post
HAHAHAHA

I love when your flatulence affects how you move around a room and the paths you take to avoid dropping a bomb near people.

Lemon makes you fart?

Lemons don't make me fart, but there was definately a lemon flavor you could taste.
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post #42 of 45
12/19/08 at 4:27am


..


Edited by merkur - 7/27/11 at 4:46am
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post #43 of 45
12/19/08 at 8:44am
dont stop just enjoy!
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post #44 of 45
12/19/08 at 9:39am
Helicobacter Pilori infection.

I had something similar some years ago and the farting/gas lasted months, I have myself fully checked by a good gastroenterologysts and he found out and prescribed me a 10 day antibiotics treatment and then I was healed.

Nasty bugs they are those ones
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post #45 of 45
12/19/08 at 4:54pm
I've got the same problem man, I think it's just par for the course if you lead a healthly lifestyle. I eat like 6x a day with a 40/40/20 carb/protein/fat ratio and no processed foods. I can literally fart every 5 minutes for an entire hour whe I wake up in the morning. It's atrocious.

Being single, it's not so bad b/c I can blast out whenever the urge hits, though obviously not while at work. What I am concerned about is what happens when I find a new woman? I can't lay in bed all morning and cuddle, my guts would explode. At night I lay on my side with the blanket uncovering my ass so as not to taint the comforter or create my own personal dutch oven.

As demonstarted from February 23rd, 2007 LINK, I've been enduring this problem for some time now. There is virtually no help or end in sight.
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