Holy shit. You're right. I THOUGHT I'd read the whole thing when I posted.
What a train wreck.
Sometimes I have no class on this thread, or I post after a drink or six. Or I have an avatar with...just saying It's hypocritical for me to call out people for rudeness or going off the rails in their wordings. OR many other sins of political incorrectness.
The gay thing, however, is different. Please accept this.
I believe this Titanic of an Internet argument was headed in the right direction before it rammed the iceberg/ran into traffic/whatever. Elsewhere on SF, especially when you search archives gay/ghey etc. is not only an accepted pejorative but it's almost a badge of honor to use in a sentence. (and I know, some of those posts are a decade old and perhaps at least some of the poasters could have changed their ways in the intervening years--or left SF because they were called out for it and felt unwelcome)
I didn't search SF looking for it. I'm not the language police. I discovered SF in a Google search, and started searching the site for things like "what shirt colors go best with a brown suit" and all the other basic clothes questions we have at first that are answered here 1,000 wonderfully different ways. But there among the information/inspiration I needed...seeing gay/ghey everywhere made me think twice before participating here or registering...it took me a while to realize that it's just some subset of the people who act that way.