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Australian Members - Page 3152

post #47266 of 54945
What do you call a Frenchman wearing sandals? Philippe Philoppe
post #47267 of 54945
Keep em coming. I could use a laugh.
Bar jokes are always good.

A grasshopper walks into a bar and orders a drink.
The bartender says "hey, you know we've got a cocktail named after you".
The grasshopper looks up surprised. "What? Kevin?!"
post #47268 of 54945
The barman says: “We don’t serve faster-than-light particles here.” A tachyon enters a bar.


A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says: “Five beers, please.”
post #47269 of 54945

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.

 

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonerMatt View Post
 

OK - my new location is a rainy and windy place.

 

Looking for a coat that's knee length (or mid thigh), water proof and wind resistant.

 

Preferably not $3000, but perhaps happy to pay up to $1000 for something truly great.

 

An umrella will not be enough - the rain is horizontal at the moment, and this is 'common' according to literally everyone.

 

I'll need to own gumboots to walk to work.

Luxire will make you a jacket of your design in Epic Fabric for $500 USD inclusive of shipping, fully MTM. Epic is one of the best tech fabrics around, and will keep you very dry. I will be receiving a mac in a couple of weeks.

post #47270 of 54945
.....

Edited by CoffeeDudeGuy - 3/21/14 at 6:04am
post #47271 of 54945
Quote:
Originally Posted by iSurg View Post

Any suggestions on beans? I tried a Colombian from St Ali, which had a lighter note. This Kenyan I'm on at the moment has a lot more tannic flavour.

 

Oak Room in Ashburton have some good ones at the moment. Beans by Monk Bodhi Dharma, but Ken who runs the joint provides excellent service most of all (His sons run Workshop Brothers in Glen Huntly, pretty good too). Beans from Omar and the Marvellous Coffee Bird down at Gardenvale/Brighton are good as well. These are some of the better, less well-known ones besides Auction Rooms, Proud Mary, Seven Seeds and the like...

 

Quote:
Originally Posted by sliq View Post
 

gentleman, would any of you be as so bold as to share your skin care regime?

 

at the moment i'm using Cetaphil facial wash and moisturiser - but have started to use some Grown Alchemist goods; cleanser, toner, the odd serum and moisturiser. 

 

it made make my skin look and feel as though it glowed (got a positive comment on a date last night).

 

Used coffee grinds and coconut oil. No, really.

 

Food is one of the biggest factors though, especially cutting out milk and sugars. But since we are mostly covered in classic/work/street wear, focusing on the face only should be enough :rotflmao: 

post #47272 of 54945

Two penguins toddling along when one suddenly stops, turns to his friend, looks him up and down closely and says " You know what mate? You know you look a lot like you're wearing a tuxedo".

 

The other penguin smiles back at him slyly and says

 

Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)
"Maybe I am..."
post #47273 of 54945
I love bar jokes:

Man walks into a bar with a piece of Tarmac under his arm, says to bar man, "one for me and one for the road"

Jumper leads walk into a bar, bar man says, "you can stay but don't start anything"

Two sandwiches walk into a bar, bar man says, "sorry, we don't serve food in here"

Horse walks into a bar, bar man says, "why the long face?"

And my favorite non bar joke ... Vegetarian, old Indian word for "bad hunter"
post #47274 of 54945
Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnsNotHere View Post

And my favorite non bar joke ... Vegetarian, old Indian word for "bad hunter"

How do you know if someone is a Vegan?

 

Oh don't worry, they'll tell you.

post #47275 of 54945
Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnsNotHere View Post

I love bar jokes:

Man walks into a bar with a piece of Tarmac under his arm, says to bar man, "one for me and one for the road"

Jumper leads walk into a bar, bar man says, "you can stay but don't start anything"

Two sandwiches walk into a bar, bar man says, "sorry, we don't serve food in here"

Horse walks into a bar, bar man says, "why the long face?"
Warning: Spoiler! (Click to show)
The Horse replies "I have cancer" and bursts into tears


And my favorite non bar joke ... Vegetarian, old Indian word for "bad hunter"
post #47276 of 54945
Quote:
Originally Posted by fxh View Post


nah nah - further up toward The Bay/ Forest etc. Anyway I could tell you but then I'd have to throw you over cliff into the Blowhole at the 12 11 10 9 8 7 6 5 Apostles. You could spend your weekends looking for the Mahogany Ship. Or go and see my school mates the Dead Livers - when they reform. Yet again

One of my mates (his band opened for the Stones at Kooyong in '72) used to run The Boggy Creek pub @ Curdie Vale - nothing else there - possibly still does - just outside of W'bool - nice for a visit and quiet afternoon on the slops in a bucolic atmosphere.

 

That pub is still there and it's still scenic as fuck.

post #47277 of 54945

CoffeeDudeGuy: Thanks for the suggestions! Will try those mentioned beans. I saw a whole bunch of youtube clips for BulletProof coffee and it kinda scares me that you have to drink a shiteload of butter... Probably not a good thing for someone with a sedentary lifestyle like mine...

post #47278 of 54945
Quote:
Originally Posted by Foxhound View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by JohnsNotHere View Post

And my favorite non bar joke ... Vegetarian, old Indian word for "bad hunter"
How do you know if someone is a Vegan?

Oh don't worry, they'll tell you.

When I worked for Mt Buller that was the standard ski instructor joke. And if you were an instructor it was an examiner joke. Very adaptable smile.gif
post #47279 of 54945
Satre was visiting USA - he walks into a cafe and orders a coffee with no cream.
The waitress says, “Sorry, we’re out of cream. How about coffee with no milk?

Afterwards him and Descartes walk into a bar.

A, well read, customer recognises them and asks if he can buy them a beer.

Descartes replies, “I think not.”. And they both disappear.
post #47280 of 54945
Quote:
Originally Posted by The Ernesto View Post

The barman says: “We don’t serve faster-than-light particles here.” A tachyon enters a bar.”
A sphere walks into a bar and orders a drink.
The bartender says, "I'm sorry, but we don't serve spheres here."
The disgruntled sphere walks outside, but then gets an idea and performs Dahn surgery upon himself.
He walks into the bar, and the bartender, who does not recognize him but thinks he looks familiar (or at least locally similar) and asks,

"Aren't you that sphere that just came in here?"

"No, I'm a frayed knot."
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