Just follow sartorial rules and fit in already.
Look at the world around us - what has change brought? crime, moral depravity, nuclear war, environmental disasters and women's rights.
When we waive from our traditions society falls apart at the seams.
(1) Chelseas come from an even older tradition, consequently hold greater importance
(2) the yearling texture is not analogous to latex
(3) Last time I checked penii do not bend at a 90 degree angle