Interracial/Intercultural Dating - Page 2

I think the cultural differences between non FOB Americans is pretty small in regards to race. I feel a lot of Americans who like to think they have some kind of strong cultural identity would be very clueless if they were ever dropped into their "motherland." Anyone remember in The Sopranos when Tony's crew went to Italy? That's what I'm talking about.

arent you like 19?

Im almost 24.

oh ok, sorry. For some reason thought you were a lot younger.

It's a bad idea, avoid it.

I think it depends on your personality type. Some people are more suited to this than others. My girlfriend of 2+ years is from another culture, but I believe we are a perfect match; I can't conceive of anyone in my culture being as good for me, and she said vice versa. But we're both kind of weird.

If that was directed at my marriage, I have thought about it quite a bit, trust me. I spent around 2 years (one month here 8 months there) in a long distance relationship with her. There are some very very cute girls at my school and all, but Yumi and I more or less just connect well and share similar values when it comes to a lot of household shit and what not, and dont get me wrong, she is not ugly, Just fairly normal OL fare. There have been times I just wish she came later in my life, especially with temptations that I had to withstand, but in the end she is more important to me than banging a girl (or several) who might look better than her but are as deep as kiddie pools/are immature.


QFT. I am kind of an oddball of an American guy as i dont dig sports (at least trad sports) and am a very neat/tidy guy who takes care of himself. I am also rather thoughtful when it comes to details (such as dressing myself, I dont just step out the door wearing whatever, and you will never see me wearing sweats or shit from Abercrombie and the like). Though at the same time I am a total gearhead who loves to get arm deep into cars and bikes and I love the good kinds of racing (Rally, Wangan, Touge, F1, AutoX), and I love beer. The white women that I have dated in the past were slobs and messes emotionally and well. My ex girlfriend (whom I lived with for almost two years) would never clean anything around the house and often her clothes would end up in piles in the closet/ on her side of the room.
I value a woman who can stand on her own and doesnt need me constantly, but is willing to share responsibility for everything around the house.

Excellent, I feel exactly the same way. Interracial Dating is all about personalities, whether they clash or not. It really doesn't matter to me what your "racial background" is, as long as we have a good time and such.

It was directed at myself actually, but I think I found the right girl in the end. IMO all things equal, go for someone in your own culture. It's so, so, so, so much easier.

It works if one of you speaks the other's language well enough.

If not, it can be tough for you when you really want to SAY something, or especially if you have to use a "third" language for communication.. a lot of my international students have other international student significant others... it seems REALLY tough for them sometimes. For example, a Japanese male and a Korean female. The Japanese guy speaks almost no Korean, the Korean girl speaks NO Japanese, so they tend to communicate in English, which neither of them speak fluently.

I never date interracially, but dated across cultures pretty frequently. Actually I've date more out my culture than in. Most of my girlfriends have been West Indian, though I suppose it isn't really interculturally as my father is Jamaican and I grew up in Hartford, CT. I've only run into cultural issues dating Haitians which I chalk up to a preference for and greater understanding of people of Afro-Anglo cultures.

That is a good point Rach. I would also like to hear the experiences from the gay perspective as well. Gays are discriminated against simply on sexual preference, regularly, but throw in race and what happens? Now this could be viewed as Straight to gay discrimination and vice versa as well as amongst the gay community.

my wife is columbian - while she is also from European genetic heritage, culturally there are differences. sometimes that can cause friction, but all is all it has worked out very well. the biggest things probrably were in how we see family, and the general accepted noise level of the house. but after 10 years, we have reached very acceptable comprimises.

I've dated women of various races and ethnicities. There is baggage with ALL of them. Is there a short hand for people of your own background? Yeah, but relationships boil down to 1.) compatibility; 2.) compassion; 3.) love. My wife is of Russian-Jewish extraction, FWIW.