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Would You Sleep W/ Your Childhood Friend's Mom?

post #1 of 108
Thread Starter 
I've been mulling over posting this all day, but I figured I'd go ahead and share / ask for advice. Soooooo, I was at the pet store today getting cat food when I saw my ex-friend's mom buying several bags of dog food (they own a kennel). I went over to say hello and we talked for several minutes. The normal stuff: how is school going, how is your work going, me asking about the family, etc. I end up helping her take the shitload of dog food out to her car. We pack everything up and she just stands there and gives me a weird look. She asks me, "What are you doing tomorrow night", and I respond with something along the lines of, "I'm actually going out of town, but I'll be back Sunday. Why, is ***** still home from school?" (I'm incredibly naive). She says that he isn't and she thought maybe her and I could "get together". Being the awkward moron that I am, I say, "Yeah, maybe." She decides this is great, has me put her cellphone number into my address book and grabs my hand and says goodbye before getting into her car.

Yeah. I have no idea what spurred that but, some background info: the friend was a childhood friend (probably my best for some time) that I played soccer with. We hung out sparingly throughout high school (he went to another school) but he turned into a neo-douche so I've only spoken to him a few times within the last few years. However, he did leave me a message about three months ago, totally out of the blue. I returned his call, left a message, and haven't heard back from him since. The mother: has aged very well. Having ridiculous teenage ideals, I don't think I ever really realized it. To give you an idea: she dated a professional baseball player after divorcing my friend's dad, so she has the typical athlete's girlfriend look of a blonde bimbo with breasts. Very conventionally attractive. Growing up with my friend, I always thought it odd that she had not one, but two very serious boyfriends for many years. They had to know about each other, and it didn't occur to me until later that they probably didn't care as long as they got a piece.

And now I'm here, wondering what to do. I wouldn't post anything if I didn't want to have sex with her. Sex would be the ideal route. However, I'm afraid of the karmatic retribution. This "friend" did contact me just a few short months ago, so obviously there's still a connection there. What if he finds out? My mom knows his mom on a first name basis, though I doubt they've come into contact in a long, long time. Am I missing anything? Is there anything else I should be worried about besides being murdered or accidentally scarring her son for life? Should I just stop being a pussy and have at it? Thoughts.
post #2 of 108
Have at it. You will certainly regret it if you pass up. If you do hit it, there's just a slim chance for regret. Realistically, all you risk is a bit of embrassment.
post #3 of 108
You only have one life, chap.
post #4 of 108
Nope. She's married!!!
post #5 of 108
Are you sure this isn't some sort of fantasy you just made up?! ---She's married? I figured she was a single mom with multiple boyfriends when they were growing up. This is his fantasy, so I'm sure he can just make her unmarried in his mind... It can't actually be real... Can it?
post #6 of 108
Quote:
Originally Posted by jonglover View Post
I've been mulling over posting this all day, but I figured I'd go ahead and share / ask for advice. Soooooo, I was at the pet store today getting cat food when I saw my ex-friend's mom buying several bags of dog food (they own a kennel). I went over to say hello and we talked for several minutes. The normal stuff: how is school going, how is your work going, me asking about the family, etc. I end up helping her take the shitload of dog food out to her car. We pack everything up and she just stands there and gives me a weird look. She asks me, "What are you doing tomorrow night", and I respond with something along the lines of, "I'm actually going out of town, but I'll be back Sunday. Why, is ***** still home from school?" (I'm incredibly naive). She says that he isn't and she thought maybe her and I could "get together". Being the awkward moron that I am, I say, "Yeah, maybe." She decides this is great, has me put her cellphone number into my address book and grabs my hand and says goodbye before getting into her car.

Yeah. I have no idea what spurred that but, some background info: the friend was a childhood friend (probably my best for some time) that I played soccer with. We hung out sparingly throughout high school (he went to another school) but he turned into a neo-douche so I've only spoken to him a few times within the last few years. However, he did leave me a message about three months ago, totally out of the blue. I returned his call, left a message, and haven't heard back from him since. The mother: has aged very well. Having ridiculous teenage ideals, I don't think I ever really realized it. To give you an idea: she dated a professional baseball player after divorcing my friend's dad, so she has the typical athlete's girlfriend look of a blonde bimbo with breasts. Very conventionally attractive. Growing up with my friend, I always thought it odd that she had not one, but two very serious boyfriends for many years. They had to know about each other, and it didn't occur to me until later that they probably didn't care as long as they got a piece.

And now I'm here, wondering what to do. I wouldn't post anything if I didn't want to have sex with her. Sex would be the ideal route. However, I'm afraid of the karmatic retribution. This "friend" did contact me just a few short months ago, so obviously there's still a connection there. What if he finds out? My mom knows his mom on a first name basis, though I doubt they've come into contact in a long, long time. Am I missing anything? Is there anything else I should be worried about besides being murdered or accidentally scarring her son for life? Should I just stop being a pussy and have at it? Thoughts.
Sounds to me like you're in for a spin out of something from Dustin Hoffman's film classic "The Graduate".
Most of us have had a friend or two with a knockout mom [and the mom knows it]

I guess it really depends on whether you're of the legal age of majority, and, if you can handle the fallout.
post #7 of 108
If you don't like her son all that much, do it. I doubt he'll find out anyway. It's not like she's going to tell him. I'd be very suprised if she wants anything more than a one-night stand with her son's friend. "Short fling" is the ceiling on this one.
post #8 of 108
You know, sometimes you just gotta say fuck it.
post #9 of 108
Fuck her. Fuck her brains out. Suck her tits, squeeze her buns. You know she wants it.
post #10 of 108
Quote:
Originally Posted by jkennett View Post
Are you sure this isn't some sort of fantasy you just made up?!


---She's married? I figured she was a single mom with multiple boyfriends when they were growing up. This is his fantasy, so I'm sure he can just make her unmarried in his mind...

It can't actually be real... Can it?

Oh boy... This sort of thing starts off as a fantasy but if I can recollect some of the things that happened in high school over 30 years ago - be careful what you wish 'hard' for. A coming of age ritual more than you think and the pun is intended.
post #11 of 108
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dakota rube View Post
You know, sometimes you just gotta say fuck it.
Exactly. You know the inside scoop.
post #12 of 108
Quote:
Originally Posted by c3cubed View Post
Oh boy... This sort of thing starts off as a fantasy but if I can recollect some of the things that happened in high school over 30 years ago - be careful what you wish 'hard' for. A coming of age ritual more than you think and the pun is intended.
Hah... yeah. Sadly, or perhaps luckily based on what you're saying, those days have passed me by. I really just wanted to use the smiley b/c I haven't had a reason to yet, and felt this was a good fit. Question for the OP. Can you take the son in a fight, because if he finds out.... you're going to have one angry bastard coming after you.
post #13 of 108
Quote:
Originally Posted by jkennett View Post
Question for the OP. Can you take the son in a fight, because if he finds out.... you're going to have one angry bastard coming after you.


Or do you happen to keep a Louisville Slugger handy?

Though it's probably not common for the mother to recap her daily fuckfests with her son lol
post #14 of 108
Now you got one more conversation piece at the dinner table, banging your friend's mom.
post #15 of 108
Shit, if you won't do it, give me her number!
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