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wedding help!

post #1 of 6
Thread Starter 

style amateur here, but willing to take advice - on what to wear to my own wedding! 

 

Thought it would be fun (or amusing) for a few of you, to point me in the right direction.  I have many questions - I'll try to do them one or two at a time.

 

Let's get started:  Traditional around these parts (and maybe everywhere?) is:  Groom rents a tux, groomsmen rent a similar tux, The End.

 

If I weren't suspect of that "custom"  I wouldn't be posting here...please advise!

 

Is this, really, what most people do?  (I mean "most people" at large, not "most people who read this forum.")

post #2 of 6
Quote:
Originally Posted by shipcamein View Post
 

style amateur here, but willing to take advice - on what to wear to my own wedding! 

 

Thought it would be fun (or amusing) for a few of you, to point me in the right direction.  I have many questions - I'll try to do them one or two at a time.

 

Let's get started:  Traditional around these parts (and maybe everywhere?) is:  Groom rents a tux, groomsmen rent a similar tux, The End.

 

If I weren't suspect of that "custom"  I wouldn't be posting here...please advise!

 

Is this, really, what most people do?  (I mean "most people" at large, not "most people who read this forum.")

Hi,

 

I'm going to move your question to Menswear advice, where you might have some more eyes and sympathetic pens.

 

There are a lot of good ways do do wedding clothes.  

 

To start with, you might want to check out our editori-in-chief's recent wedding guides, here:

 

http://www.styleforum.net/a/what-to-wear-to-almost-any-wedding

http://www.styleforum.net/a/what-to-wear-the-black-tie-wedding

http://www.styleforum.net/a/what-to-wear-the-casual-summer-wedding

post #3 of 6
Thread Starter 

Well, I'm a bit disappointed - generally the advice is without end here for all kinds of issues!

 

I have (previously) read those articles, and I appreciate them.  However, they aren't really for the groom - me.

 

I'm trying to find out, basically, what is going to happen when I buy a tuxedo to wear, but my groomsmen do not.  Must they rent?  Can they wear a suit?

 

I know there are threads saying just that - even that the GM needn't match - but having been to dozens of weddings (i mean the ceremony) I can confidently say that 100% of them had matching groomsmen.  Is that a regional thing?  A budget thing?

 

Look, I can just do "the regular" ...but if I wanted to do that, I wouldn't need help!

post #4 of 6
Quote:
Originally Posted by shipcamein View Post
 

Well, I'm a bit disappointed - generally the advice is without end here for all kinds of issues!

 

I have (previously) read those articles, and I appreciate them.  However, they aren't really for the groom - me.

 

I'm trying to find out, basically, what is going to happen when I buy a tuxedo to wear, but my groomsmen do not.  Must they rent?  Can they wear a suit?

 

I know there are threads saying just that - even that the GM needn't match - but having been to dozens of weddings (i mean the ceremony) I can confidently say that 100% of them had matching groomsmen.  Is that a regional thing?  A budget thing?

 

Look, I can just do "the regular" ...but if I wanted to do that, I wouldn't need help!

If you looked at our instructionals, an this one in particular: http://www.styleforum.net/a/should-i-wear-a-tuxedo-if-my-groomsmen-are-wearing-navy-business-suits you'd read that it's generally considered in ill form to dress above your groomsmen.  They don't need to "match", but they should be of similar formality.

 

It's 2016, and pretty much anything goes, but this is the canonical answer.

post #5 of 6
Thread Starter 

again appreciate the info.  I have many questions, let me boil it down to this (safe to say I have read dozens of forums and articles at this point, as well as being a church employee long enough to see a lifetime of other people's weddings):

 

If the groom must match the bride in formality, and the bride is in a formal gown, and a tuxedo is not for daylight, and the groomsmen must match the groom, but most weddings are at 2 or 4 then pictures then a reception and do NOT involve a wardrobe change, while knowing that barely anyone can afford a tux (groom notwithstanding, just the GM), then what, exactly, do regular people regularly do?  Something must give somewhere...

 

I see people now in Not A Tux.  She's in a great white gown.  Is that not Awful?  I see weddings where I am better dressed in my "lounge suit" than many of the men in the wedding party - and they rented the outfit.  Is this not an important day, deserving of some sartorial respect?  What the heck are people doing these days?  I get it, "anything goes," but that's not us.  We want "anything goes" to "go ahead and be gone."

 

This very website includes links to articles reminding us that photos are forever, and wear something timeless, classic, and classy.  That is NOT anything goes.

 

See my confusion here?  I'm just looking for input on what most folks do most of the time.  Normal people.

post #6 of 6
Quote:
Originally Posted by shipcamein View Post

again appreciate the info.  I have many questions, let me boil it down to this (safe to say I have read dozens of forums and articles at this point, as well as being a church employee long enough to see a lifetime of other people's weddings):

If the groom must match the bride in formality, and the bride is in a formal gown, and a tuxedo is not for daylight, and the groomsmen must match the groom, but most weddings are at 2 or 4 then pictures then a reception and do NOT involve a wardrobe change, while knowing that barely anyone can afford a tux (groom notwithstanding, just the GM), then what, exactly, do regular people regularly do?  Something must give somewhere...

I see people now in Not A Tux.  She's in a great white gown.  Is that not Awful?  I see weddings where I am better dressed in my "lounge suit" than many of the men in the wedding party - and they rented the outfit.  Is this not an important day, deserving of some sartorial respect?  What the heck are people doing these days?  I get it, "anything goes," but that's not us.  We want "anything goes" to "go ahead and be gone."

This very website includes links to articles reminding us that photos are forever, and wear something timeless, classic, and classy.  That is NOT anything goes.

See my confusion here?  I'm just looking for input on what most folks do most of the time.  Normal people.

If that's indoors, most men probably wear dark suits. Tuxedos for weddings seem to be losing popularity. In the ideal ceremony, the groom probably should dress slightly more formally than groomsmen, as in peaked lapels and wholecut shoes.
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