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the hygiene of ...

post #1 of 159
10/29/07 at 11:48pm
Thread Starter 
Up until about 4 months ago, I was a clean shitter. 95% of my shits were of the don't ask, don't tell variety - the first wipe came out clean. A great place to be, my friends.

4 months ago, for reasons I don't entirely understand, I became a messy shitter. Now, I wipe and wipe and the shits are still not clean. The hair on my ass gets dirty, the asshole itself continues to ooze poo, etc. It's horrible.

I've resorted to wiping until I chafe.

If I can take the shit before my shower, everything is fine. But a lot of times, it happens at work, and I have to walk around the rest of the day with spicy ass.

How do I clean up after shits such as these? How do I shit clean again?
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post #2 of 159
10/30/07 at 12:01am
You need more fiber in your diet. Get on a fiber supplement. Eat some raw veggies, drink plenty of water. As for the chafing, that is for n00bs my friend. Get some Wet Ones or keep a roll of paper towels near the shitter, rip it in half and then wet one half to wipe, and dry with the other half.

When will people learn?
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post #3 of 159
10/30/07 at 12:43am
you dont know how to wipe and you are how old?
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post #4 of 159
10/30/07 at 1:38am
Quote:
Originally Posted by CarllraC View Post
Up until about 4 months ago, I was a clean shitter. 95% of my shits were of the don't ask, don't tell variety - the first wipe came out clean. A great place to be, my friends.

4 months ago, for reasons I don't entirely understand, I became a messy shitter. Now, I wipe and wipe and the shits are still not clean. The hair on my ass gets dirty, the asshole itself continues to ooze poo, etc. It's horrible.

I've resorted to wiping until I chafe.

If I can take the shit before my shower, everything is fine. But a lot of times, it happens at work, and I have to walk around the rest of the day with spicy ass.

How do I clean up after shits such as these? How do I shit clean again?
I am so glad I ate prior to reading this.
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post #5 of 159
10/30/07 at 1:48am
Thread Starter 
Guys, please be serious. Imagine going from a once a day clean shit, to a once a day dirty mess. Can anyone help?
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post #6 of 159
10/30/07 at 2:02am
Jsus christ man seriously this thread stinks Use some mega powerful water hose, please.
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post #7 of 159
10/30/07 at 2:02am
I can only offer moral supoprt, as I have the same problem. It seems to correlate directly with stress level, though.
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post #8 of 159
10/30/07 at 2:26am
In before lock
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post #9 of 159
10/30/07 at 2:36am
Get one of those water hose attachments to your toilet.
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post #10 of 159
10/30/07 at 2:44am
Enemas.
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post #11 of 159
10/30/07 at 2:56am
Quote:
Originally Posted by LabelKing View Post
Enemas.

I get a good colonic once a year and you feel squeaky clean from the inside out. But it isn't good to do too often as it could interfere with natural bowel movements and peristalsis.
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post #12 of 159
10/30/07 at 3:07am
Quote:
Originally Posted by acidicboy View Post
Get one of those water hose attachments to your toilet.
yup, those rock. Never been cleaner.
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post #13 of 159
10/30/07 at 5:29am
I have the same problem, for those who suffer it is a serious problem.

Right now I use special wipes for the final wipe, makes everything clean. Make sure you get the ones from the toilet paper section, normal baby wipes can clog your drains.

I have 2 long-term solutions in place:
1. Get the hairs in my arse crack lasered so they don't catch.
2. Get one of these

I am 100% not joking
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post #14 of 159
10/30/07 at 5:58am
Quote:
Originally Posted by CarllraC View Post
Up until about 4 months ago, I was a clean shitter. 95% of my shits were of the don't ask, don't tell variety - the first wipe came out clean. A great place to be, my friends.

4 months ago, for reasons I don't entirely understand, I became a messy shitter. Now, I wipe and wipe and the shits are still not clean. The hair on my ass gets dirty, the asshole itself continues to ooze poo, etc. It's horrible.

I've resorted to wiping until I chafe.

If I can take the shit before my shower, everything is fine. But a lot of times, it happens at work, and I have to walk around the rest of the day with spicy ass.

How do I clean up after shits such as these? How do I shit clean again?

So far the suggestions of more fiber and enemas.... maybe become friends with marc_au/shooman?
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post #15 of 159
10/30/07 at 5:56pm
Gsmart - where`s that video again?
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