or Connect
Styleforum › Forums › Culture › Social Life, Food & Drink, Travel › Nerd dating
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Nerd dating - Page 2

post #16 of 80
How old are you? Are you in undergrad or grad school? And why the heck would you want to date a lawyer? Many cultural organizations in large cities (e.g., museums, theaters, symphonies) have benefactor organizations composed of young professionals that provide social and networking opportunities. You might want to check them out.
post #17 of 80
Quote:
How old are you? Are you in undergrad or grad school? And why the heck would you want to date a lawyer? Many cultural organizations in large cities (e.g., museums, theaters, symphonies) have benefactor organizations composed of young professionals that provide social and networking opportunities. You might want to check them out.
Not in Florida. (read: Florida Philharmonic went bankrupt and no longer exists; thus you can guess the status of the "˜cultural' life in Florida) OK, sorry, rant over. Jon.
post #18 of 80
Quote:
thus you can guess the status of the "˜cultural' life in Florida
and just what do you call JIMMY BUFFETT? i rest my case.
post #19 of 80
Regarding um, "˜nerd' dating. I think what you are looking for is someone to have an intelligent conversation with (not to say that sexual attraction and the "˜liberties' that go with it are not important as well) something that even in an ever-growing world population is exceedingly difficult to find. Most people are unfortunately on average not interested in cultural life, save for living a few select major metropolitan around the world (NYC, London, Tokyo, Paris, Berlin, etc...) or for that matter interested in anything that requires the use of ones mental ability. The overall general populace worldview is that intelligence is something to be frowned upon. Instead the concentration of most people's attention lies towards activities and interests that require as minimal amount of brain power as possible, such as sports, movie stars, concentrated vernacular music, and so and so fourth. Before I get flamed, please understand that I am not stating that sports, vernacular music, etc... are subjects that should not broach ones attention, nay, one should be in tune with the world in which one lives in; avoidance will only lead to a devoid of modern knowledge that will challenge ones ability to properly function as a member of society. Obviously, people who are still in college (the so-called "˜academics') or attended / graduated college will yield better possibilities of finding a match, but that is by no means a guarantee of finding what you want. Thus, my point is that you should not give your hopes up, hope for the best and expect the worse; if not too much heartache occurs. Jon. Sorry for the grim view, I guess it's the Argentinean in me (ever heard Tango lyrics?)
post #20 of 80
Must we revive this thread?
post #21 of 80
Quote:
As such, I don't really understand vero's comments.
Allow me to elaborate, based on my 20/20 hindsight of college. If you are a "nerd", as you say you are, you are likely smarter than 95% of the women you are attempting to have conversation with. Therefore, based on 20/20 hindsight, I advise that instead of focusing on trying to have good conversation with these women, focus on having good sex with these women. You'll find plenty of good conversation with women later AFTER college. Right now, let your and her hormones do the talking. In college, many women WANT to have sex. For this reason, some of the best sex you will ever have in your life you will have in college, 'cause, man, once you get married, it can all change on you -- very little sex, but plenty of great conversation, assuming you married the right woman for you. I was very likely a "nerd" just like you in college, but I never viewed myself that way. I was extremely studious and by no means popular or active in student government or anything. But, I had just as much or more to offer than the jocks, frat boys, or Mr. Populars. Whether or not some women recognized that at the time was their problem, not mine. Some women recognized this, and we had a great, not-very-intellectual time together. Finally, in my junior year, I met a woman far smarter than me and we got pretty serious (plus had even better sex). Come graduation, we recognized that college is not reality and decided that we had to not go further with our relationship because we had divergent career aspirations (two Type A's with career aspirations is hard to manage in a young marriage). After college when we were still single young professionals, we met up on business travel if our paths were scheduled to cross and had more great sex. Now, I'm married. Now, she's married. And it ain't to each other. For that, we are both happy. We are different and it took years of growth to recognize that we probably would not have been happy together in the long run if we had done something stupid like gotten married in our early twenties. But, boy, do we have great memories of great sex in college. Remember, NOW IS THE TIME to do it doggie-style on the roof of the Administration building with the skyline of the city glimmering in front of both of you -- it will be much harder to do that after graduation. So, net/net, I advise you to contain your intellectual conversation in college to yourself, your professors, and your guy friends, and go have fun with the women on your campus. Most likely, fun is more of what they are looking for in this time of their life anyway. Don't bore them to tears with intellectual dribble when they would rather jump your bones. Focus on biology, not physics.
post #22 of 80
Hmm, I will agree with vero group that perhaps one can just muddle through worthless, insipid conversation in a relationship so one can achieve the final goal of (hopefully) great sex. Now all this depends on how much shit (pardon my French; Ernest pardon my use of the word French ) you are willing to put up with to reach your final goal. My current limit regarding a relationship is drug use. And I don't mean Turkish heroin, I'm talking about pot. Since I do not partake in any drug-related activities (well, alcohol...which technically is a drug) it is kind of hard to be with a girl (um, I mean young woman) who wants to stay alone get stoned and then (for lack of a better term) fuck. Granted, I'm all for the latter, but I shan't partake in the former. Unfortunately the amount of people on drugs is staggering (even to my open-mindedness). Whilst I take a laissez-faire attitude regarding other peoples drug use, I don't endorse my own. Baring that aforementioned snafu, I can talk to anyone about almost anything and my stubbornness and competitive edge allows me to discuss whatever is the topic of conversation for hours on end. At the same time, my interest are ever ranging and I can always find something in common with other people, as mush as I might like a particular subject, it is just a scratch at the surface of my interests and knowledge (which in return can be attributed to an almost photographic memory). I can go from baroque to rap music in a single conversation without any concern, as both are of interest to me and can easily handle either topic with ease, which I guess is the ultimate trick, to always find something you can talk about that will lead to a good enough conversation in which, you are not bored to tears, but she is in an interested enough mood, that afterwards will allow you to take certain "˜liberties'. Jon.
post #23 of 80
Quote:
Don't bore them to tears with intellectual dribble when they would rather jump your bones. Focus on biology, not physics.
In college and grad school, I found that the two subjects were not mutually incompatible. Just realize yourself that there are no perfect women, and appreciate them for what they have to offer. They'll reciprocate. I don't really agree with vero, whose personality I would assume many women would find a little intense. But I guess some women like that - who can account for taste? BTW, don't take on a "project". At the beginning, it might be cute, but inevitably, you'll be frustrated, and she'll be resentful.
post #24 of 80
Quote:
(which in return can be attributed to an almost photographic memory).
Hmmm. I think I must have more of a pornographic memory.
post #25 of 80
Quote:
Quote:
(imageWIS @ 22 Sep. 2004, 09:19) (which in return can be attributed to an almost photographic memory).
Hmmm. I think I must have more of a pornographic memory.
Don't get me wrong, I remember porn too. Jon.
post #26 of 80
Actually now that I think about it, I have the perfect anecdote regarding what we are discussing: The night before I left NY from my 5-day trip earlier this month, I was scheduled to go to my cousin's friend's birthday party at around 10:00 pm (some club, it sucked, but the night got better afterwards, CU has one nice student body ), thus I found myself dining alone at Serafina Fabulous Grill, which was about a 1 ½ minute walk away from my hotel (I stayed at The Regency on Park & 61st) and was sitting next to some guy in his late 30's - late 40's (the restaurant is pretty dark, and you can never tell nowadays anyway) who was having dinner with a pretty young woman (probably half his age, and with a eastern European accent), and I happened to listen to part of their conversation; and what really caught my attention was this part: Man: So, you know who I played tennis with today? Woman: Who? Man: Rupert Murdoch's ex-wife Woman: Blank Stare Man: Do you know who Rupert Murdoch is? Woman: Blank Stare, then: "No" Man: He owns News Corp Woman: Blank Stare Man: News Corp owns Fox, the TV channel? Woman: Oh. Man: Anyways, he is a really wealthy man and I played tennis today with his ex-wife Woman: Wait, who did she divorce? Man: Rupert Murdoch, he owns News Corp... At which point I tuned out because I was almost sure that I had lost a few million brain cells and needed to keep my ear from bleeding unto my Polo Pink Pony shirt (it is white, after all&#33, then after a while I tuned back in out of curiosity and there was almost a word-by-word recapitulation of the Murdoch conversation. My point? Looks don't always go with brains (although sometimes you get lucky, but don't count on it)...and some people are fucking morons. Jon.
post #27 of 80
Must we revive this thread?
post #28 of 80
Don't get me wrong -- I am not advocating that you have a large quantity of sex with 20 to 30 women in college. I am advocating having high quality sex with 1 to 5 women in college.  Just don't expect these women to be your dream women who you're going to fall in love with and have a mature relationship. Odds are, you won't. You're likely too young and don't know yourself well enough at this point in your life to have a mature relationship. I didn't have a real, mature relationship until I was 30 or so because that's how long it took me to figure out just what the hell I wanted out of my life. Today, by the way, is my 35th birthday... And man, don't fall into the typical faulty male logic of working hard right now with hopes of making lots of money after graduation that will attract lots of women who will give you lots of sex. It didn't happen that way for me. I was too busy working and travelling on business after college to even date, much less get much sex. Heck, come to think of it, I didn't have much time to spend all the money I was making either, it just went into savings and investments. Again, hindsight being 20/20, I recommend working less and HAVING FUN now -- you'll be focused on your career pretty heavily after school, putting in long hours as you start at the bottom rung of the ladder in your company / industry. During this time, finding the time and energy for dating women may be challenging for you. More than likely, the women you'll be sleeping with then will be "convenience" women you work with on your project teams at work, and boy can that ever get messy quick and cause headaches and dilemmas. Whatever you do -- don't sleep with a client. My $0.02: Get as much out of your system -- literally and figuratively speaking -- as you can RIGHT NOW while you are in college and the picking is ripe.  
post #29 of 80
Quote:
And hey, once i've got lots of money I'm sure there won't be any shortage of girls to have sex with so that I can make-up for my college years
A huge miscalculation. I firmly believe that the way you choose to live now is the way you'll choose to live in the future. A guy doesn't devote his life to making partner/tenure/lots of cash, and having achieved that goal, suddenly change priorities and become a fun-loving, easy-going, what will be will be guy. For starters, there is always the next million/the prestigious prize/the senior partnership to chase. Do you think that Warren Buffet or Bill Gates need to work another day in their lives? They work because that is what they do. And the next thing is that you really don't want to attract a bunch of golddiggers in any case, and the professional and especially artistic and academic women are not likely to be overly attracted to your big bucks. They may have some of their own, or in the case of artists and academics, may sort of look down on men who believe strongly in the value of wealth building.
post #30 of 80
If you're still in school, maybe you should just take (or audit) some interesting elective classes and see if you can find your dream girl there. It worked for me. I met my wife in an undergrad honors physics seminar.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
Styleforum › Forums › Culture › Social Life, Food & Drink, Travel › Nerd dating