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Paying on a first date - Page 2

post #16 of 207
7/25/07 at 12:57pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fabienne View Post
I've said it before, but I've always hated it when men automatically decided they would pay for my meal.

Yeah, but you're, you know ... French.
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post #17 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:00pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Manton View Post
Yeah, but you're, you know ... French.

I don't think that's very French.
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post #18 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:01pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Manton View Post
Yeah, but you're, you know ... French.

Come to think of it, the last person to have paid for my meal was... a Frenchman. But he was much older than me and would have been offended if I hadn't allowed it. I protested minimally and accepted gracefully.
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post #19 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:02pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by RJman View Post
I don't think that's very French.

Oh? Have you been dating in France? Tell all!
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post #20 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:04pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fabienne View Post
Oh? Have you been dating in France? Tell all!

Mé non!
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post #21 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:04pm
I will always pay on a first date if I asked the woman out. If a woman asks me out, I'll let her pay, but we'll often split or I'll get the tab, depending.
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post #22 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:07pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by RJman View Post
Mé non!

C'est ça, oui, à d'autres !
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post #23 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:17pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by bslo View Post
I've heard various men make similar statements, and the sentiment seems incredibly outdated to me. Usually, the statement is made by a man trying to appear gallant, which is typically the kind of man women should stay away from (no offense Matt).
I guess that I should clarify that I am talking about the original courtship period, and not a years long relationship. Nevertheless, it is the way I was raised and find a woman's insistence on paying and all of the other feminist pretense that goes with it to be a huge turn of. Then again, I haven't been in the early stages of dating a woman in about 15 years, so I don't really know what is a turn off. Thinking about it more, if a woman wants to pay for me, I would prefer that she had me over to dinner at her place. That seems much more appropriate than whipping out the calculator after the date. Edit: I guess Baron's solution makes sense. If you ask, you pay.
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post #24 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:30pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by iammatt View Post
I think that a man should pay as a rule on all dates. If a woman wants to pay one time as a nice surprise, fine, but in the normal ocurse of things I would not feel comfortable with a woman paying for me.

So what were you giving me shit about?
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post #25 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:38pm
If they insist on paying I tell them those McBurgers where just remnants from last night's dinner anyways. Ladies love a man who got his shit together.
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post #26 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:38pm
dont know how this is a question, regardless of how much she makes, i go on a date with her i pay.
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post #27 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:40pm
This is something I've thought about myself since I have a history of picking up the bill. I'm starting to think about settling down, so if a woman doesn't show any generosity over the course of a few dates (assuming she's making similar $$ to me), I've made a rule to dump her immediately. The traditional side of me wants to pay, but the other side is telling me to avoid any woman that shows signs of female entitlement so early in a relationship. I think you set the tone for a relationship early-on. If you pay for everything right from the start, you're doomed before you begin.

I'm voting that I'd let her pay to see how she deals with my response. Many women make false offers to pay knowing fully well that most men will usually insist upon paying, which of course they accept. If she holds-out b/c I let her do what she asked to do, then goodbye, and next!

EDIT: My reading skills have been failing me lately. I just realized this was for a first date.
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post #28 of 207
7/25/07 at 1:47pm
I think a man should pay on the first date, and all dates after. Like iammatt said, it`s OK for the woman to pay for a surprise here and there.

If a woman offers to pay, I always just say *don`t worry about it* and quickly take the check. If they continued to insist on paying (which never happened to me before) I would start wondering why they want to pay so badly. It would make me feel like I did not give them a good time, so they want to pay half (or full) to make sure I didn`t think it was a real date.
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post #29 of 207
7/25/07 at 2:35pm
Would love to see this correlated with who will pay full price for a pair of shoes...
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post #30 of 207
7/25/07 at 3:17pm
To be quiet honest the whole concept of asking a woman to a dinner is like saying - Look im not interesting enough , but i will bribe you with dinner and drinks for you to sit and listen to me!

Instead, my first dates are always over coffee, and its hardly much to start with and I pay for them. But it sure beats dinner and akwardness of who pays what.
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