Need Brand/Fit Advice (Suits and Sportcoats)

Long time reader, first time poster (out of frustration). I need advice, bad. I have serious trouble finding suits and sport-coats that fit (don't want to go MTM or bespoke). I am a 38R with a 29-30 waist but muscular thighs (the sort of male equivalent of an hourglass shape maybe?)

What I Wear Now:

All of my more casual and button down shirts are RL Polo Custom Fit. All of my dress shirts are Nordstrom Non-Iron trim fit. I like these 100x more than the Brooks shirts I used to wear.

For pants, I like Dockers D2 or Banana Republic "regular fit" chinos. I have tried Bill's Kakhis, Bonobos, J Crew, but Dockers/BR are the only two types that fit.

Here is where it gets interesting. Suits and sport coats are my nightmare, but I can't live without them. When I go to court or meet with clients, I need a suit. Around the office, I can wear business casual (button down and sport coat), but I still need to look nice. I have tried all kinds of brands, and my biggest problem is finding a happy medium between something that fits my athletic build but doesn't look to skinny. I think I am still stuck in my prep school mentality of a conservative "east coast American" fit. On any given day, without court or a client meeting, I wear chinos, a button down shirt (maybe a tie), and a sport coat.

My biggest problem with suits comes from the pants. Most "trim" or "slim" suits have skinny pants which don't suit me at all. I have a very small waist, but muscular legs. With these suits, you can either see the full outline of parts you shouldn't see in the front, they are way too tight in the seat, or they look like parachute pants. I can't find something in the middle. I have tried buying a size up in pants and having the tailor alter them, but by the time they get done making them fit, the whole line of the suit is ruined. And generally, there isn't enough fabric to let the pants out in the areas that need to be let out if I actually find my size.

For the jackets, I HATE slim fit. A huge trend on Style Forum and in stores is to have a "slim" fitting jacket that looks fine when your arms are at your sides, but the minute you lift your arms up, the jacket looks too tight unless it is unbuttoned. That drives me nuts. I've tried standard Hickey Freeman suits, and they are too boxy. I've tried all of the Brooks line, and they are either too boxy or too tight. I've tried Saks house brand, but they are way too trendy and tight. I refuse to buy Hugo Boss or any other fashion brand on principal.

I like to be able to move around and feel comfortable in my suit. If I have to keep it unbuttoned to shake hands or raise my arm comfortably, I think something is wrong. I also prefer more unstructured jackets without a lot of padding. I have looked at suit supply, but they are a little to trendy for my taste. Even looking at their online catalog, the suit button is pulling (is that the new thing?).

This is where I need your advice. Right now, I have a love hate relationship with Jos A Bank (don't jump the gun yet!) because they seem to fit me. I think their Sig Gold tailored fit suits are a great value on a buy one get three sale, and I like their Sig tailored fit sport coats. They have a traditional enough cut that I don't feel like I'm trying to be in a European fashion catalog, I can move my arms comfortably, and they are trim enough that I can get them tailored a little to fit better, but most of all, the fit is predictable. The shoulders are perfect (no dimple), the collar of the suit doesn't come off of my shirt when I move (huge pet peeve, and I see this a lot on even very expensive suits), the sides don't look artificially suppressed, and there isn't too much extra fabric in the back.

I know I can go in there, get my size, and it works. (I hate shopping). My problem with these suits is that they are sometimes too structured and have too much shoulder padding. I am also afraid I might look an idiot with a suit that is not what is "in" right now.

Here are my questions

1) what are some good jacket patterns that could dress up more casual chinos? (the entire range of kakhi colors)

2) where is the line drawn between a suit being a traditional American cut (not slim/euro) and being too big in general? All I see now are suits that are getting tighter and more uncomfortable.

2) what are some other brands to look for in suits and sport coats? (MTM and bespoke aren't worth it to me).