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Guys giving me a hard time at work because I wear suits all the time - Page 11

post #151 of 158
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chopper88 View Post
 


Maybe that's the problem. I asked you what people were saying to you, to see what we're talking about here, but got no response. I do understand it can be unintentional, but you seem attacked rather easily. Those two characteristics are not a great combination. You certainly don't have to bow down for all criticism, and take shit from everyone. But acknowledging the underlying problem in certain cases is a good thing :)

 

With that response, you make it easy for me to say "yes you are", but I wont. You just have to realise, that you might also set this up the same way for people who will, even though you don't intent to do so. Either with clothes, buying a watch, saying something someone else doesn't want to hear. It happens, just give in a little from time to time. You need people around you, and to get where you want to be, you need people to need you. If they don't like you, they will do everything to avoid you and won't need you.

Well, I never mentioned I got mostly compliments from most people, and small comments here and there. After a point people got used to it. (About 6 months- 1 year so I am not easily attacked) The harshest comment was still good natured and went along the lines of "who are you trying to impress?" and "what are you doing? we're casual here." I also got a friendly reminder that it's not going to get me a promotion. 

 

In my particular situation my work is impeccable, so this topic is truly about clothing and personality. 

 

I've heard the graphic tee analogy, but no one wears graphic tees... We are in a building where investors, multimillion dollar a year customers, partners etc. walk around all the time. The CEO's office is in the same building. Like I said initially, the women get it, they dress to the tee. 

 

The problem occurred when a VP I reported to had a problem with it because he wears polo's with holes in it and looks like hes dressed for gardening. I guess he spread a rumor and someone from HR asked me if I wear a suit when at a production sites when I go there to evaluate assets. (Where I normally wear steel toe boots and a hard hat)  

 

The reason I posted this on a style fourm is to see what like minded people think. I understand I need people around me and I am positive I have a naturally pleasing personality. I like to have people around me and to work together with. I am an all around people person.

 

Where I am different in personality from others is that I am far more ambitious than the average person. I have a strong inner voice that tells me to keep striving beyond my circumstances or station in life. I also enjoy the finer things in life. My clothing reflects my personality, so does my car (Honda S2000) as with my choice in many other things. I like to push and inspire others, and also I also like to be pushed and inspired. 

 

I understand that throughout a career you have to get people to WANT to work with you. The question is, should you stop being yourself for the sake of fitting in?


Edited by slickback - 5/23/14 at 11:59am
post #152 of 158
Where in Jersey do you live? Curious as I grew up there.
post #153 of 158
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by patrickBOOTH View Post

As a person who dresses up daily, those outfits would go unnoticed in my office. I don't know why they would foster attention.

The outfits with no tie are the ones that were "toned down" in the recent weeks

post #154 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by slickback View Post

The question is, should you stop being yourself for the sake of fitting in?

That's something everyone has to answer for themselves. No one else can answer it for you.
post #155 of 158
Thread Starter 

post #156 of 158
Where do you live in Jersey?
post #157 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by slickback View Post
 

The question is, should you stop being yourself for the sake of fitting in?

If being yourself is actively hindering your career (and you seem to like your job), then I think this is a rather easy question to answer.

 

The other solution would be to get out of there and go find a job where the people dress business formal all the time.  Something tells me you'll still wear or do something to differentiate yourself in that environment, though...

post #158 of 158
Quote:
Originally Posted by diadem View Post
 

If being yourself is actively hindering your career (and you seem to like your job), then I think this is a rather easy question to answer.

 

The other solution would be to get out of there and go find a job where the people dress business formal all the time.  Something tells me you'll still wear or do something to differentiate yourself in that environment, though...


I was very attached to "being myself" for a long time, but then I realized that I was not actually that great. "Striving beyond your circumstances" should include changing who you are.

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