Post your five favorite bands and I will mock and generalize you. - Page 2

You only have one tempo and it's plodding. Breaking Benjamin? What the fuck? You might as well listen to Simon Says.



P.S. Dolores O'Riordowned.

You are white and in college.

You're that guy that says he "likes everything" and is agreeable to the point of severe irritation. You probably own Live 8 on Blu-Ray. Go to hell.


You are fucking awesome at Tony Hawk 2.

When you were 11 one time your parents took you on a road trip to the U.S. and you stopped at the drive-thru of an Arby's in Dearborn, MI wearing this shirt:



A black guy gave you a confused look and your parents nervously locked the doors of their Altima. Sometimes you still have nightmares.

You always wanted to dye your hair some dipshit color but your overbearing mother wouldn't let you. Then your dick fell off. You use the word "classy" more than most people do, and far more than anyone should.

You once placed a newspaper personal ad describing yourself as "wistful." You are still recovering from the erection that the cornfield sex scene from whatever Children of the Corn that was gave you. Your alcoholism causes you to relate facts regarding local history that people mostly nod at.

One time you tried to impress a girl with high-falutin' talk about your headphones, but she ended up fucking that lacrosse player (who is a closeted homo) anyway.