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I need feminism because tumblr - Page 26

post #376 of 5646
Originally Posted by harvey_birdman View Post

At least she still has her white privilege.

Well, Duke wouldn't let in a poor PoC. Dog whistle.
post #377 of 5646
Do they have poor people in New Jersey?
post #378 of 5646
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by Lighthouse View Post

Do they have poor people in New Jersey?

Lol, yes. Try attending a concert in Camden.
post #379 of 5646
Originally Posted by harvey_birdman View Post

Lol, yes. Try attending a concert in Camden.

No. 32 on the bucket list.
post #380 of 5646
Thread Starter 
Originally Posted by Lighthouse View Post

No. 32 on the bucket list.

I'd do it last, as if things go poorly you won't be doing anything else on your bucket list.
post #381 of 5646
Thread Starter 
Gamer Privilege


"Being able to game is a privilege. Being able to boycott is a privilege. I have the power to engage in the leisure activity, and try to change things about it that I don’t like. In the spirit of invisible knapsacks and unpacking them, and this blog’s themes, below I’ve listed some of the ways my situation has given me an advantage over others in relation to technology. I am an American, white, from a Christian family, middle-class, young, able-bodied, average-sized, and non-transexual.

I can decide what technology is valuable, and look down on those who do not have access to technology or choose not to use it.
I can ignore my positions of power. I didn’t think to preface this post with a disclaimer of the American-centric point of view.
I can decide what products to boycott, afford to boycott them, and criticize others for not boycotting them.
I can have an ad-free blog.
When I purchase a game, my payment is unlikely to be questioned because of my physical appearance or dress.
I grew up with a computer, and was taught how to operate one and type in school. I grew up with video games and access to them.
I can afford a cell-phone and a laptop.
I have the leisure time to game.
I can afford to purchase the newest games and technological gadgets.
I can drive to the store to immediately purchase something I decide I want, and can afford to pay shipping if I choose to purchase it online.
I can decide what others could afford or should purchase if only they didn’t spend their money on what I define as frivolous.
Games are written in a language that is familiar to me.. Game reviews and magazines are written in a language I understand, and “experts” are usually from my race and class.
I can use the internet as a tool to reach others like myself.
I can determine which genres of games are valuable and which are “beneath me.”
I can easily find games that represent members of my own race."
post #382 of 5646
Thread Starter 
"I wasn't molested privilege."


"Let’s talk about privilege.
Usually when we think of privilege, it’s simple things like your parents giving the privilege to drive their car, or having the privilege to go to school or not go hungry. But privilege is much more than that— it’s about the everyday, ordinary things in our lives that we take for granted. A black person, for example, cannot go to the mall without being followed by security (because all black people are shoplifters, or course). A white person doesn’t have to worry about that— they can go to the mall and be perfectly fine. Similarly, many women cannot walk down the street without having people yell sexist things out of passing cars. A man can walk down the street and think about puppies and kittens. That’s what privilege is— you can do ordinary things without harassment or without feeling self-conscious or unsafe, and you won’t even notice it as something extraordinary.
The other day, a friend told me about how she was hanging out with some friends when they suddenly started telling jokes— jokes about sexually abused children. The thing about privilege is, you can do or say things about other people under the assumption that those people are not present. Or, if they were present, their opinion and their feelings wouldn’t matter anyway. This is all, of course, in spite of those very inconvenient statistics that 1 in 4 women and 1 in 6 men have been raped, molested, or sexually abused.
Privilege is also about convenience; the conscious and sometimes subconscious desire to ignore issues or problems. A white person can say things like “hey, let’s all just be color-blind. People are just people” because they’ve never been made to feel like less than a person because of the way they look. A person who hasn’t been sexually abused can say “Why is the internet signal in here so retarded and gay?” (answer: because it was abused as a child), all without even realizing that if there are at least six people in the room, it’s pretty likely that someone is going to be hurt by what you say. For you, it’s a joke— but for that person, it’s an experience or multiple experiences that are so horrible that they’d rather die than have to relive them.

What can I do, say, or feel safely that others cannot? Would people of other groups be able to do these safely?
If I speak out about how I feel or voice my opinion, will others take me seriously? What if I was in X group or minority?
Are people of my group equally represented in popular media?
Do I ever feel like I have to “prove myself” to other people because I am different?
Do I ever look at other people and envy what they have or can do?
Are my needs being met when I express them?"
post #383 of 5646
Thread Starter 
The Adult Privilege


"I am a firm believer in the personhood of children and that children are an oppressed group. It pains me to see so much child hate within feminism; not from all feminists of course, but there certainly is a lot of mother-blaming and child hate in some pockets of feminism. Many others have spoken eloquently and thoughtfully about this before me, so I’m not going to reiterate what they’ve said. Long story short, I believe that children’s rights are important, and that feminists in being progressive and advocating for marginalised groups of all kinds, should be invested in working for the rights of all oppressed groups – including children.

The Adult Privilege Checklist

As a child:

I am not legally allowed to vote, even though government makes decisions about me and people like me.
If I need a caregiver, he or she will not be my peer.
It is often considered acceptable, appropriate and even desirable for my caregiver to physically assault me if I do not please them.
In many places I can legally be physically disciplined in my place of education.
If I am hit, even once, by a loved one, that is not normally legally considered abuse.
It is likely that I am smaller than the person assaulting me, and that I will be unable to defend myself.
If I am behaving in a way others do not like (or my caregiver has decided they no longer wish to be in a certain place), it is considered acceptable to physically pick me up and forcibly remove me from the area/situation.
If I am routinely yelled at, criticized, and belittled in my own home, this might not generally be recognised as abusive behaviour.
My physical and emotional needs are often not treated as reasonable and important.
If I am angry or upset, this is often not taken seriously and I am often condescended and patronised.
I am almost always dependent on others for my economic support.
I do not get to make choices about family finances, when to spend money and on what.
If I am allowed to earn money at all, it will be at a lower rate than adults doing exactly the same work.
I am routinely ignored or told to be quiet.
If I am the only child in a group of people, I will often be shut out of the conversation or patronised.
It is considered acceptable to talk over me or to interrupt me while I am speaking.
When I display age-appropriate behaviour, other people find it unacceptable.
I cannot be ‘noisier/more active than average’ in a public place without people questioning my right to be in that place.
If I am ‘noisier/more active than average’ in a public place I risk myself and my caregiver being thrown out.
I cannot speak in public to a group of people without putting people my age on trial.
I do not have free choice with my language. If I use ‘unacceptable’ words I will often be punished.
If I am suffering from mental health problems, I am often dismissed and have them put down to my age.
Adults often feel they have the right to harass me.
Adults feel it is their right to talk to me even after I make it clear I do not wish to talk to them.
Adults feel it is their right to touch me (tousle my hair, pinch my cheek) without my permission.
Society and the media often portray people like me in a negative light.
The media often describes people like me as lazy, ignorant or criminal.
People often make decisions on my behalf and tell me that they know better than I do what is best for me.
The world is not generally sized to fit me:
I am not usually able to find a seat which is made for somebody my size.
Light switches, windows, sinks and toilets are not usually positioned for someone my size to be able to reach easily.
I cannot be certain that I will be able to lock the door to my bathroom stall or reach the toilet paper once I’m sitting down.
It is very possible that I might find myself trapped somewhere that I cannot leave without assistance.
Silverware, plates, and glasses will usually not be sized to fit my hands.
When eating out, or at a film, the wait time will probably not feel reasonable to me, and if I eat as I would at home I might attract stares and rude comments.
If my wait time for food or entertainment feels unreasonable, and I complain, people will generally not be understanding and apologetic.
I can’t talk with my mouth full without people putting this down to my age.
I might not understand the unspoken rules of interacting in public spaces, they might not feel natural to me, and might not be able to follow them without causing myself distress.
I may not be able to speak my native language with fluency and am often not understood by other native speakers.
It is considered acceptable for another speaker of my native language to laugh at me for my language choices, or inability to express myself.
I am not usually given a choice about my place of education (or whether to participate in education). If I am sent to school I am legally expected to attend, whether it is my choice or not. If I am home educated I might not be given the choice to go to school if I so wish.
If I am late to my place of education I will probably be reprimanded, even if this is the fault of my adult caregiver.
I am almost never permitted to choose my educational curriculum, materials, or pace.
My educational evaluations will often be based on circumstances entirely outside my control–the actions of other students, or of my caregivers, or the learning materials available to me.
If I am feeling ill, I might not be able to adequately express this to my caregiver. If I can, I might not be taken seriously or treated properly.
If I need to see a health professional, I am reliant upon my caregiver to arrange this for me.
Medical professionals often ignore me entirely, choosing instead to speak to my caregiver only about my needs.
I am not able to make my own medical decisions. The right to make these decisions belongs to other people entirely (usually my adult caregivers).
In some places, if I require an abortion, my adult caregivers must be notified, which can sometimes place me in great danger.
I might not be able to attend to my bodily needs (housing, food, water, toileting, health needs, taking myself to bed) without relying on someone else to assist me.
I am often forced to eat foods I do not like.
People might advocate force-feeding me, and this is not often seen as abusive.
My bedtime is set (often arbitrarily) by my caregiver, and I often do not have input on this.
I have no choice about my living space – the house I live in, its decoration, the arrangement of furniture etc.
I often have no choice about my outward appearance – haircuts, clothing etc.
I am usually not given a choice about which religion to follow.
If I wish to spend time with other people, I need the permission and sometimes the assistance of my caregiver to arrange this.
If I do not wish to spend time with a certain person or people, I am not usually given the choice to avoid them.
My sexual development is often not explained to me and sometimes actively discouraged.
If my sexuality/gender identity is not cis and straight, I can expect to be told it’s “wrong,” and efforts will be made to change it. Use of force is considered acceptable in this situation.
It is considered unacceptable for me to enjoy my sexuality.
My belongings can be taken from me (often by my adult caregiver) and this is not viewed as theft.
If I am in public unescorted by an adult, random adults may demand to escort me, and restrict my movements; this is considered acceptable, regardless of my own opinions or those of my legal caregiver.
I am limited in what films I may see alone, regardless of my opinions or those of my caregiver.
It is considered acceptable or even “prudent” for me to be discriminated against and regarded with suspicion when patronising a store or other establishment.
It is often considered acceptable to force me to submit my belongings to a search before/after/during my visit to a store or other establishment."
post #384 of 5646
I didn't think I needed more reasons for my misanthropy.
post #385 of 5646

The Monogamous Privilege


For the purposes of this list, I will refer to one’s position on the diagram of monogamy vs. various types of non-monogamy (polyamory, open marriage, swinging, religious polygyny, etc.) as simply “relationship orientation”.

Note that for the purposes of this list, “relationship orientation” does NOT refer to one’s sexual orientation re: the Kinsey scale (heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, pansexual, etc.). Monogamous individuals who are LGBTQ and/or in interracial and/or intergenerational romantic relationships may well be exempt from some (though not all) of these privileges, especially those marked with an asterisk at the end.

Monogamous Privilege Checklist:

1) I can legally marry whomever I wish, with all the legal, medical, and financial benefits of marriage universally recognized for me and my family no matter where I live.*

2) I am not accused of being abused, warped, immoral, unethical, or psychologically confused because of my relationship orientation.

3) No one ever questions the validity of my love because of my relationship orientation.

4) It is not assumed based on my relationship orientation that I or any of my former or current partners has been misled, coerced, manipulated, or used in any way.

5) No one argues that my relationship orientation is impractical, unstable, incompatible with commitment, or otherwise effectively impossible to realize. No one argues that my relationship orientation works better in theory than in practice.

6) It is not assumed that my life must be overly-complicated because of my relationship orientation.

7) No one tries to convert me to their relationship orientation.

8 It is not assumed that I will switch relationship orientations as soon as I find the “right” person.

9) It is not generally understood that I am unfit to raise children because of my relationship orientation.

10) I can feel certain that my government will not suddenly remove my children to a foster home based on my relationship orientation.

11) As a responsible and loving parent, I won’t lose my children in a custody battle because of my relationship orientation.

12) As a responsible and loving adult, I can adopt children without lying about my relationship orientation.

13) I can be certain that my children won’t be harassed because of my relationship orientation.

14) My children are given texts and information at school that validates my family structure – two parents with kids, two sets of grandparents, etc.

15) It is not assumed based on my relationship orientation that my children are/were raised in an unstable environment.

16) No one assumes or speculates based on my relationship orientation that my children experience or ever will experience emotional, psychological, social, or behavioral problems.

17) I do not have to explain my relationship orientation to strangers whenever it comes up.

18) People don’t ask why I made my choice of relationship orientation.

19) People don’t ask why I made my choice to be public about my relationship orientation.

20) I don’t have to defend my relationship orientation.

21) I am not identified, categorized or grouped by my relationship orientation.

22) I am never asked to speak for everyone who shares my relationship orientation.

23) My individual behavior is not thought to reflect on all persons who identify with my relationship orientation.

24) If a romantic relationship of mine ends, no one blames my relationship orientation.

25) I can be sure that all of my roommates, classmates, and coworkers will be comfortable with my relationship orientation.

26) When I talk about my monogamy (such as in a joke or talking about my relationships), I am never accused of pushing my relationship orientation onto others.

27) I do not have to fear revealing my relationship orientation to friends or family. It’s assumed.

28) I do not have to fear that if my family, friends, or professional community find out about my relationship orientation there will be economic, emotional, physical, or psychological consequences for me or for others.

29) I can run for political office without expecting that my relationship orientation will disqualify me.

30) I can depart from most meetings, classes, and conversations without feeling fearful, excluded, isolated, attacked, outnumbered, unheard, held at a distance, stereotyped or feared because of my relationship orientation.

31) I can date whomever I wish, regardless of whether or not they previously identified with my relationship orientation, without fear that my new partner will be shunned by their friends and family due to their choice to embark upon a relationship with someone of my relationship orientation.

32) I am guaranteed to find people of my relationship orientation represented in my workplace.

33) I can be sure that my classes/courses/training will require curricular materials that testify to the existence of people with my relationship orientation.

34) I can easily find a religious community that will not exclude me based on my relationship orientation.

35) I am guaranteed to find sex education literature for people with my relationship orientation.

36) I can count on finding a therapist or doctor who will recognize my relationship orientation as valid, should I seek their services.

37) I can be sure that if I need legal or medical help my relationship orientation will not work against me.
38) Public hand-holding with my love is seen as acceptable and endearing. I can walk in public with my partner and not have people stare or do a double-take.*

39) I can choose not to think politically about my relationship orientation.

40) I can remain oblivious to the language and culture of other relationship orientations (i.e. polyamory, swinging, etc.) without paying any penalty for such obliviousness.

41) Even if I am oblivious about other relationship orientations, my culture affords me the privilege of judging those orientations and being an authoritative source of relationship advice because I am monogamous. This is especially true if I am a therapist, researcher, media darling, or other authority figure.

42) In everyday conversation, the language my friends and I use generally assumes my relationship orientation. For example, “family” meaning monogamous relationships with children.

43) Nobody calls me monogamous with malice.

44) I am not asked to think about why I am monogamous.

45) Society encourages me to marry and celebrates my commitment.*

46) My relationship orientation is commonly represented in music, television, movies, books, magazines, greeting cards, and postcards.

47) Major, mainstream social networking websites such as Facebook allow me to set my relationship status according to my relationship orientation.

48) I can go to relationship and dating events (i.e. singles events, relationship skills workshops) secure in the knowledge that my relationship orientation will be the standard and will be catered to.

49) I never need to change pronouns when describing the events of my life in order to protect my job, my family, or my friendships.*

50) If I’m a teenager, I can enjoy dating, first loves, and all the social approval of learning to love appropriately within my relationship orientation.*

51) If I’m called to work with children or to serve God (in most denominations), I don’t have to lie about my relationship orientation in order to keep my job.

52) I can count on my community of friends, acquaintances, strangers, and various institutions to celebrate my love and my family, mourn my losses, and support my relationships.*

53) It is not assumed merely because of my relationship orientation that I am experienced in sex (or that I even have it at all!).

54) It is not assumed that I am inclined toward my relationship orientation purely for sexual reasons.

55) It is not assumed based on my relationship orientation that I am more likely than average to have STIs.

56) It is not assumed based on my relationship orientation that I am unaware of the risks posed by my sexual behavior.

57) I am not assumed based on my relationship orientation to be sexually indiscriminate.

58) I do not have to deal with the language and culture of my relationship orientation being co-opted, redefined, and demonized by an unfriendly majority which controls the media.

59) No one ever calls my relationship orientation “creepy” or “disturbing”.

60) I can befriend people without them and/or their romantic partners assuming that I am trying to convert them to my relationship orientation.

61) No one takes issue with their children being around me based on my relationship orientation.

62) I can be fairly certain that anyone who is in a committed, romantic relationship with me will also be invited to most parties, weddings, and other social events to which I am invited.*

63) No one makes assumptions about my political views or religious beliefs based on my relationship orientation.

64) No one refers to my relationship orientation by the wrong term or label, either intentionally or inadvertently.

65) I do not have to coin or invent terms to describe my relationship orientation and familial connections to others, because the language describing my relationship orientation already exists and is known throughout the culture.

66) No one ever ridicules or makes jokes about the terminology that people with my relationship orientation commonly use to describe their relationship structures and familial connections.

– Cory Davis
post #386 of 5646
I know I need my relationship status to be validated by being present in popular media.
46) My relationship orientation is commonly represented in music, television, movies, books, magazines, greeting cards, and postcards.
post #387 of 5646
Thread Starter 
I want to start an "I am not attracted to children privilege checklist" tumblr.

I don't have to register as a sex offender.

I don't have neighbours who want to do me bodily injury as I walk to the grocery store.

I don't have to take the long way home to avoid walking in a school zone.

post #388 of 5646
Originally Posted by harvey_birdman View Post

I want to start an "I am not attracted to children privilege checklist" tumblr.

I don't have to register as a sex offender.

I don't have neighbours who want to do me bodily injury as I walk to the grocery store.

I don't have to take the long way home to avoid walking in a school zone.


post #389 of 5646
Thin Privilege (you know you want it)


The following are examples of thin privilege that those of us who are seen by society as being physically “too big” experience regularly in our lives.

Examples of Thin Privilege:
1.You’re not assumed to be unhealthy just because of your size.
2.Your size is probably not the first thing people notice about you (unless you’re being thin-shamed – the opposite of fat-shamed).
3.When you’re at the grocery store, people don’t comment on the food selection in your cart in the name of “trying to be helpful.”
4.Your health insurance rates are not higher than everyone else’s.
5.You can expect to pay reasonable prices for your clothing.
6.You can expect to find your clothing size sold locally.
7.You can expect to find clothing in the latest styles and colors instead of colorless, shapeless and outdated styles meant to hide your body.
8.You don’t receive suggestions from your friends and family to join Weight Watchers or any other weight-loss program.
9.When you go to the doctor, they don’t suspect diabetes (or high blood pressure, high cholesterol, or other “weight-related” diagnoses) as the first/most likely diagnosis.
10.You don’t get told, “You have such a pretty/handsome face” (implying: if only you’d lose weight you could be even more attractive).
11.People do not assume that you are lazy, based solely on your size.
12.You’re not the brunt of jokes for countless numbers of comedians.
13.Airlines won’t charge you extra to fly.
14.You are not perceived as looking sloppy or unprofessional based on your size.
15.You can eat what you want, when you want in public and not have others judge you for it or make assumptions about your eating habits.
16.You can walk out of a gas station with a box of doughnuts and not have people yell at you to “Lay off them doughnuts, fatty!” (This actually happened to one of my friends.)
17.People don’t ask your partners what it’s like to have sex with you because of your size.
18.Your body type isn’t sexually fetishized.
19.You’re more likely to get a raise or promotion at work than someone who is fat.
20.Friends don’t describe you to others using a qualifier (e.g. “He’s kind of heavy, but REALLY nice, though”).
21.The media doesn’t describe your body shape as part of an “epidemic”.
22.You can choose to not be preoccupied with your size and shape because you have other priorities without being judged.
post #390 of 5646
HOly shit, I don't know what is worse someone who would write out all that tripe in a self-righteous attempt at....something or someone who would read all that to be self righteously smug.
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