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Yet another Prom advice post.

post #1 of 14
Thread Starter 

So everyone in my school has some skewed idea that Tuxedoes are meant to be worn with a vest and a tie, and that wearing anything else to prom is just unthinkable. I wanted to wear a Tux where i dont have the vest, I have a black bow tie and a golden pocket square to match my date's dress. Date's Dress. Anyone think thats a good idea, or should I go ahead and follow the norm with a golden vest, golden tie and no pocket square?
Any advice would be helpful!

post #2 of 14
See www.blacktieguide.com and use the "Search" function on here for threads offering advice on prom wear.

Welcome to SF!
post #3 of 14
1. That dress is not at all gold. It is black with a nude top layer under black lace.
2. Go black bow tie, black cummerbund/vest (or since it is HS, you can skip this all together), and white pocket square.

Your date's dress is virtually colorless.

Something like this, but with white PS:
Quote:
Originally Posted by b9w4 View Post

150158_2598649184798_1811820961_1543955_760099132_n.jpg

post #4 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by kfarhaan View Post

So everyone in my school has some skewed idea that Tuxedoes are meant to be worn with a vest and a tie, and that wearing anything else to prom is just unthinkable. I wanted to wear a Tux where i dont have the vest, I have a black bow tie and a golden pocket square to match my date's dress. Date's Dress. Anyone think thats a good idea, or should I go ahead and follow the norm with a golden vest, golden tie and no pocket square?
Any advice would be helpful!

So everyone in your school, but you, needs to get a clue. The Dinner Jacket (commonly, and incorrectly referred to as the Tuxedo) is a fairly regimented thing. You may wear it with either a cummerbund  or a vest and you may wear it with a bow tie of any color so long as it is black. Any deviation from this and you are absolutely, categorically doing it wrong. Period. (This is the lecture I was given by my father, who was a member for the Tuxedo Club and, as far as I am concerned, it is immutable law).

 

Now I am off to figure out which bright red tie I will be wearing with my black suit tomorrow. biggrin.gif

post #5 of 14
The starting point should be traditional black tie, but you can bend the "rules" somewhat if you're going to feel more comfortable (or stylish) as a result. Your aim is to enjoy the prom, after all.

I wouldn't wear anything obviously matching my date's outfit- it's rather too fawning in my view. However, you might feel differently, especially if it's customary at the event.
post #6 of 14
Pocket square to match her dress sounds fine, but the bow tie and vest or cummerbund should be black.
post #7 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by MisterFu View Post

So everyone in your school, but you, needs to get a clue. The Dinner Jacket (commonly, and incorrectly referred to as the Tuxedo) is a fairly regimented thing. You may wear it with either a cummerbund  or a vest and you may wear it with a bow tie of any color so long as it is black. Any deviation from this and you are absolutely, categorically doing it wrong. Period. (This is the lecture I was given by my father, who was a member for the Tuxedo Club and, as far as I am concerned, it is immutable law).

Now I am off to figure out which bright red tie I will be wearing with my black suit tomorrow. biggrin.gif

My objections don't have much relevance to this thread, but I don't really agree with any of this. "Tuxedo" isn't incorrect, it's just the word Americans use, while Brits use "dinner jacket" or "dinner suit". It also didn't start out with strict rules, nor have any ever been truly codified. The original "tuxedo" was supposedly celestial blue, not black: https://www.henrypoole.com/?id=14&pid=2.

For the most formal types of black-tie occasions, there is a standard, which black tie describes well. But for more informal, particularly private, black tie events, variations abound. Here's one of the PoW's dinner suits:

http://asuitablewardrobe.dynend.com/2012/06/under-hammer-again.html

It is true that one thing that rarely seems to be challenged is that the suit must be worn with a bow tie, and it must be black, and that a waist covering should be worn (although this is commonly omitted today, it is still generally thought by those who care to be a mistake).

This is in contrast to white tie, which does have strict rules that are always followed, permitting very little variation.
post #8 of 14
Interesting stuff, unbelragazzo, especially the Henry Poole piece.

While I agree that there are, strictly speaking, no fixed rules, there are well established norms, which are well worth emphasising, especially to newcomers.

The black tie "rules" work pretty well for the individual and, if the majority of men adhere to them reasonably closely, for the event, too. Disagree?
post #9 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by Snaporaz View Post

Interesting stuff, unbelragazzo, especially the Henry Poole piece.

While I agree that there are, strictly speaking, no fixed rules, there are well established norms, which are well worth emphasising, especially to newcomers.

The black tie "rules" work pretty well for the individual and, if the majority of men adhere to them reasonably closely, for the event, too. Disagree?

I don't disagree with that. Those who aren't well acquainted with the traditions of black tie and the meanings conveyed by deviations from it would be well served to get the standard rig as dictated by blacktieguide.com, which is why I said my comments don't have much practical relevance for this thread. It's just a kind of historical note that the meaning of "black tie" is much less rigid than that of "white tie."
post #10 of 14
That wasn't you then, wearing a green checked tuxedo at the White House Correspondents' Dinner? ;-)
post #11 of 14
post #12 of 14
I don't know where the original post is, but Vox (who probably has more first hand knowledge and experience of black tie than anybody else who talks about clothes in public) reposted these SF posts on his blog:

http://www.voxsartoria.com/post/42147159683/a-man-who-understands-black-tie-part-1
http://www.voxsartoria.com/post/42147263346/a-man-who-understands-black-tie-part-2
post #13 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by Snaporaz View Post

That wasn't you then, wearing a green checked tuxedo at the White House Correspondents' Dinner? ;-)

Ha did somebody do that? Pics please.
post #14 of 14
Quote:
Originally Posted by unbelragazzo View Post


Ha did somebody do that? Pics please.

 

Just kidding, I'm afraid...

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